rach, i wrote this to my bff who just had a baby: feel free to use or not use as a guideline.
" i am SO happy for you, and your family, and i'm so excited to meet Hannah, but it also makes me sad for myself. you know how long we have been trying, and the hurdles we are encountering, and while we have some promising treatments on the horizon, it's not a done deal. i dont know how i will feel when i get there, so there will probably be tears, both happy and sad, and i hope you know the sadness is about me, and nothing to do with you. (i'm literally choking back tears just writing this - crying at work makes everyone uncomfortable!). i'm scared, about a lot of things, but mostly about it never happening to me, and that can be hard for people to understand and relate to, but i really want to be honest with you, so if you sense anything - distance or sadness or whatever - you know that it is something i am working on. please tell me if i have overstepped our friendship boundaries by laying all this out for you, or if you have changed your mind about my visit (i hope not, i have a lot of presents to give you/hannah)."
hugs to you all!