New and confused

[kermy79]

Ok i my lmp was the 17th of march and on sunday i started spotting, so to cut a long story short i had a miscarriage at 8 weeks pregnant.

its only been 2 days since i lost my little Oscar (what we were going to call him if he had been a boy) and i am still bleeding quite heavy.

I managed to take a little walk today and i feel guilty for doing it. I feel like i am ignoring my angel baby, like i havent given him the respect he deserves. I even cried at my friends joke because i dont have the right to ba happy yet. My lovely dh has tried (bless him) to make things as normal as possible (we have a young son) for tyler but as much as i understand, i hate him for doing this.

Hes now started asking about trying again and i am scared to death of even looking at him, i am just not sure what to think. I am not sure if i even want to try again but on the other hand if i think of giving up i hate it so much it hurts.

Help ladies, im confused and need help.

 

[kermy79]

OMG thanks for all the r&r's ladies. 17 views and not one of you could offer one word of suppot or help. Thanks a bloody lot. Thought this forum was ment to help people.

 

[Tweak0605]

I'm sorry you're having to go through this. It's been over 2 months since my MMC, and I am still not 100% healed (emotionally) from it. The only way I will feel better is when I'm pregnant again.

You will get better. It will take time. I think the walk was good for you. It's good to get out and do things like that. Just take the time you need to heal from it.

 

[Ozziemum]

Hay

So sorry for your loss. I had a missed miscarriage at 12 weeks recently (my third in a row but the first 2 were early misses). The first week i literally felt numb, like life was going on around me and i didn't have a right to join in, so i know how you feel.

We had to get back to normal for our 2 little ones but i felt angry for quite a while at DH for just getting back to normal, i actually accused him of being relieved that it had happened i was soooooo mad that he could move on so quickly.

It does get easier, been 7 weeks for me now and although its hard some days, a lot of the time it is ok now, i still struggle to see other people pregnant (i seem to be surrounded by them) and i am still reminding myself every tuesday how many weeks i would have been, 19 weeks this week :-<< for me i will feel better and worse if i ever get pregnant again, glad to be doing it all again and getting another chance but terrifed that its going to end the same way.

I really hope you start to feel better soon, sending you big hugs x

 

[LittleBird]

First, I'm sorry for your loss. It's such a sad thing to experience and it hits all of us differently.

I think Tweak is right about the walks. The fresh air and sun will help you heal and even though you don't want to forget little Oscar, you don't want to feel down and depressed. You will know when you're ready to TTC again, just talk to your DH and explain that it's too soon for you right now. It sounds like he wants most for you to be happy and maybe that's why he's bringing up TTC again.

 

[kermy79]

Thanks ladies, there is no worse feeling than knowing your alone, but thanks to you i know im not. Even though sometimes it feels like it. Im just numb, my thoughts keep wondering, i have no concentration at all. But at least i know this is normal and i will survive. Thankyou!!

 

[darcie]

You are completely normal, nobody should have to go through this. Give yourself time to come to terms with things, its only been a few days. Im sure when the time feels right you will start trying again. And dont be scared to try again and dont feel guilty about anything nothing you could of done would of prevented this so you should never feel guilty about laughing and going for walks and doing nice things. xxxxx