new to all of this :) help! :)

[nikaylav19]

Hi everyone! My amazing partner and I are getting married in april of 2014, we want to have children maybe a year or so after...we both have huge hearts for children and we really want children of our own. We want to adopt, but we also want to have a baby of our own, we want me to be artificially inseminated but the only thing is, I don't want the "father/donor" to even know who we are, I don't know if this is mean or not, it's just I want my partner and I to be the only ones that are parents of the baby, I don't want anyone else thinking about their daughter or son that they kinda have because it is there sperm.. I want an anonymous donor but I want to make sure their family history is good, there is no medical issues or anything, and also I don't know if it's possible, but my partner is darker than me, so if two females were technically able to have a baby, I would have a mixed baby, so I don't know if it's possible to do all of this...I don't want to sound any certain way, I just have put alot of thought into this and ohh things would be so much easier if two females could just make a baby of their own lol. but does anyone know atleast where to start? how much this is going to cost, and how it all works? lol thanks guys!

 

[ched429]

hello nikaylav19

 

[ebelle]

If you are looking for anonymous donor, I would think you'll have to get the sperm from a sperm bank. That would be the best way. There are a few sperm banks in the US that do provide sperm for lesbian parents. California Cyrobank is one of them.

Wishing you well and happy journey!

 

[tamzy]

Hi There nikaylav19, the ladies on this forum are very helpful.

You can choose to do it through a clinic if you want a unknown donor, as this would be the way to go, and can be cheaper if you do it the known way, but draw up an agreement that there will be no parental rights??? I don't know if they do this in your country, but I'm from South Africa, things are different. let me know how your searching goes, all the best of luck, we are all here for you.

 

[bjbuchanan]

My partner and I have debated every possible scenario for getting prego and here's the deal.

Generally speaking if you're going with a cryo bank its going to run you anywhere from $300-$500 a "pop" and its suggested that you try at least 2 "pops" on your 2 most fertile days. If youre adding that up we are already at $1200-$2000 a month to try and they say it takes on average 6 months. We were told by our local cryo bank that if you have a known donor that it takes the cost down by around $100-$150 each cc which helps.

We also read that fresh sperm are more "active" thus more likely to get you knocked up. After long consideration we decided to try the fresh sperm route with a known donor to see how that goes before the purchase route. So we found our seed guy (thank you jennifer anniston and the movie the switch) and started to research what sort of contract needed to be drawn up. We found out that in our state if there is no intercourse and the exchange was always in a donation capacity that there were no legal ties to the donor. Meaning that he had no rights to the child, but also to protect him that we had no right to try and get child support etc from him. Not sure what the law is in your state but it would be worth looking into. Regardless we did write up a generic contract before he handed over his guys

Currently we are about a week past our first missed period and hoping for the best.

Do your research and make the best decision for you...Good Luck

 

[ebelle]

My partner and I have debated every possible scenario for getting prego and here's the deal.

Generally speaking if you're going with a cryo bank its going to run you anywhere from $300-$500 a "pop" and its suggested that you try at least 2 "pops" on your 2 most fertile days. If youre adding that up we are already at $1200-$2000 a month to try and they say it takes on average 6 months. We were told by our local cryo bank that if you have a known donor that it takes the cost down by around $100-$150 each cc which helps.

We also read that fresh sperm are more "active" thus more likely to get you knocked up. After long consideration we decided to try the fresh sperm route with a known donor to see how that goes before the purchase route. So we found our seed guy (thank you jennifer anniston and the movie the switch) and started to research what sort of contract needed to be drawn up. We found out that in our state if there is no intercourse and the exchange was always in a donation capacity that there were no legal ties to the donor. Meaning that he had no rights to the child, but also to protect him that we had no right to try and get child support etc from him. Not sure what the law is in your state but it would be worth looking into. Regardless we did write up a generic contract before he handed over his guys

Currently we are about a week past our first missed period and hoping for the best.

Do your research and make the best decision for you...Good Luck

keeping fingers crossed for you to get that !