Newly single, living with ex, anyone else been there?

[DaisyDreamer]

Hi all my ex and I finally broke up last night. It's been a long time coming this past two months and it was a straw that broke the camel's back sort of thing.

Things is we live together in a very tiny "one bedroom apartment"--only one place to sleep inf you catch my drift. Looks like it will be this way for a while, considering all of our stuff is pretty much interwoven together, back accounts, sharing one car, etc.

Anyone else been there? How did you manage, how long did it last? Did it suck or were you guys able to be friendly eventually?

 

[Tropiclands]

Well you really aren't fully separated if you're still living together. Are you able to move away on your own?

 

[DaisyDreamer]

Well you really aren't fully separated if you're still living together. Are you able to move away on your own?

Not particularly due to finances.

 

[Tropiclands]

Okay. Are you trying to get financially independent to where you are able to live on your own?

 

[Noria]

I think you should move out as fast as possible! I did the same thing!

 

[MrsT&Ben]

I lived with my (can't come soon enough) ex husband for 3 months after we split up. It was hell.
Thankfully he slept in the living room and I was in the bedroom.
I hated it. You need to find a way to move out asap.

 

[SpecialScars]

I posted earlier here. I'm divorced with 3 FT kids from that marriage, 14 weeks pregnant with bf, but I'm breaking up with him tonight. We both live with his mother, and as a single, now pregnant mom of soon to be 4, there's NO WAY I can move out until I finish my BSN program and get a career - in 3 years. We don't share finances or accounts or anything, since he shares all that with his mommy (barf - part of the problem). . .so it's easier for me to feel independent since I've basically felt that way except for having to live here where the rent is cheap. . .I feel like it's doable. I also have a friend who has lived with her ex-husband for years because she is unable to make it on her own, and he pays all the bills. It's not fun, but they've made it work this far. I think it's manageable if there is a plan - for me to rush out of here would disrupt all my children and be an enormous hardship and isn't worth is as long as my 'bf' and his mom can respect my needs and space, and I pay them rent and take care of the household chores, ect, like I always do.

so, don't worry and DON'T rush into another, different stressful situation that you can't afford. SLowly separate yourself from him, open your own accounts and take your time to assure you're doing things wisely. have a good plan and move towards that. Don't sleep with him!! Give yourself a break from other men as well - don't rush into anything just to have some support. . .good luck!!