Nipple confusion - heartbroken :(

[knk2011]

So it seems family have been pacifying my son with dummy's etc and been getting him to sleep with a dummy - something I never did.

Now he refuses to latch sometimes and then when he does he gets lazy and blisters me

Today I am pumping because I don't want to change him to bottles and formula. That would just be too big a change.

I'm heart broken, as much as I complained about how sore I got or how it felt I was always doing the work load, it was mine and his special thing, something only I could give him and now it's gone

I am just glad I can still provide him with my milk with a bottle.

 

[rhii]

Don't lose hope ..my baby is a month old and we had latch issues until two days ago when I started using a shield! Could you try a nipple shield?? That might be a better transition for him if it's nipple confusion that's going on...then you can wean off it later if you need to.

 

[knk2011]

It's definitely an idea.

 

[summer rain]

Don't panic! Some babies go through a phase of lazy latching even those who haven't had dummies or bottles. My youngest latched perfectly and all by himself for the first week or so but then he started latching really lazily, pulling off, taking in loads of wind and getting easily distracted during feeds. I am not sure why but I think over active let down and slight oversupply has something to do with it. Definitely not nipple confusion as he wont take a bottle or a dummy at all and not tongue or lip tie either. It has improved and I have noticed when he is semi asleep or really hungry he will latch perfectly. Xx

 

[knk2011]

Don't panic! Some babies go through a phase of lazy latching even those who haven't had dummies or bottles. My youngest latched perfectly and all by himself for the first week or so but then he started latching really lazily, pulling off, taking in loads of wind and getting easily distracted during feeds. I am not sure why but I think over active let down and slight oversupply has something to do with it. Definitely not nipple confusion as he wont take a bottle or a dummy at all and not tongue or lip tie either. It has improved and I have noticed when he is semi asleep or really hungry he will latch perfectly. Xx

That could be the problem, sounds like what Reuben does. He seems to take a lot of air lately and pulls off for no reason.
Just like his father, easily distracted lol x

 

[optimistic1]

If he seems distracted it could be a developmental thing maybe? Anytime my daughters eyesight improved she'd be a horrible eater cause she wants to test out her eyes by staring at everything. Right now she's noticing bright colors and we have the bright red thing in our living room that she loooves she stares at it all day and talks to it and laughs. When she's eating she'll pull off multiple times so she can stare at it make sure its still there I guess..

 

[CatherineK]

Just be patient, he will latch I bet. And never give him a bottle yourself, that way no matter what other people do, he will associate YOU with breast only. I've breastfed three and never had to supplement, even with working full time from 2 months on. But I have never given any of my babies a bottle. They associated bottle with daddy, and breast with mommy.

 

[CelticNiamh]

I would keep at it as well, and try laid back breastfeeding https://www.llli.org/docs/0000000000000001WAB/WAB_Tear_sheet_Toolkit/01_laid_back_breastfeeding.pdf

it could be a phase he is going through and hopefully ends so you can get back to feeding and not having to worry about expresing and bottles

I also agree with you never giving baby the bottle

 

[CatherineK]

Id also have a talking to, to relatives giving pacifiers without your approval. I would not let them have my child for any length of time unsupervised I they are not following your rules for your child.

 

[MrsClark24]

Oh sweetie! Keep trying, take the pacifiers away and just keep trying. good luck!

 

[knk2011]

If he seems distracted it could be a developmental thing maybe? Anytime my daughters eyesight improved she'd be a horrible eater cause she wants to test out her eyes by staring at everything. Right now she's noticing bright colors and we have the bright red thing in our living room that she loooves she stares at it all day and talks to it and laughs. When she's eating she'll pull off multiple times so she can stare at it make sure its still there I guess..

I think this is what's happening.
I noticed today that he seems to be able to lock his eyes onto my face now, it feels as though he is actually looking at me now.

Our living room is black and white so he's fascinated by it all and he has a strange fascination with the stairs!

 

[Athena]

He's only two weeks old hun your family can't have had the opportunity to give dummies for too long a time can they? Did they just do it when you were out the room or something? Poor you that's so naughty to do that without your permission! Chuck the dummies and do as the others said, get daddy to give a bottle if he absolutely needs one and keep nursing, you will keep that lovely special bond

 

[nuffmac]

My MIL gave Oliver a dummy the first few days he was home. I was so annoyed! I got rid of them and he is fine without them. He nursesfor comfort when he needs to.

I second the other ladies and say dont go to the bottles. I had yo use a nipple shield for a few weeks on one side snd he latched to it no bother. He still had to latch properly to the other side which took a couple of tries but he did.

My little guy gets soooo distratcted by black. I tell everyone black is his favourite colour already!!

Hope its going better for u. Lay down the rules with the family and friends on what u want and why. Its hard first time but i fou d once i started speaking up and saying no then they stopped being as pushy. Xxx

 

[mysteriouseye]

How are you getting on? Don’t worry too much I had Esmee on the breast on a nipple shield for 2 months and gave her a dummy I thought I would never be able able to breastfeed her normally but nearly a year on I have just given up breastfeeding and that has been her on my bare breast and if it doesn’t work out there is nothing wrong with the bottle either xxx