not single yet, considering leaving but scared.

[hanernaner24]

I am currently 34 weeks pregnant. Throughout this pregnancy, I have had an extremely hard time with anxiety and depression. I have also noticed that my boyfriend is a lot different than I thought he was before I was pregnant. I've noticed he isn't emotionally there like I need him to be, he doesn't have the same interests as me, his sense of humor sucks (which i am a huge goofball and humor is important), and family is a huge part of my life and he really doesn't care that I really want him around them more to get to know them since I am pregnant with his child and it really hurts me. I have become more and more unattracted to him throughout this pregnancy, but havn't made a decision to leave for the fact that I want to make sure I am completely myself before making a big decision. I know I am hormonal, but I am just so unhappy being around him. He doesn't even have to yell, just being in his presence makes me unhappy. I don't enjoy his company, he doesn't do anything for me, I never get excited to see him, ever. Most of it has to do with I feel like he hasn't been here for me emotionally and has been selfish and I havn't been able to be comfortable around him during this pregnancy bc he makes me feel bad for certain things. Example, his dog (who he loves to death) sheds horribly. I ask him to get her hair cut or just help maintain it bc I'm uncomfortable with it all and he gets annoyed and says he'll brush her but refuses to cut her hair bc he doesnt believe in haircuts (the brushing doesn't work btw bc she has so much hair). I also don't want the dog in the bedroom bc all the hair gets on the bed and drives me insane when trying to sleep, but I am scared to ask him to let her sleep on the floor or outside of the bedroom bc I'm scared to hear his reaction. I don't feel comfortable talking to him about anything bc his reactions always come out a bit selfish and not caring and makes me feel bad. SO, currently I am only around because I'm trying to make it work for the baby, but everyday I really think about leaving. I'm just scared to make the move bc we did have a big argument a few weeks ago and I threatened to leave and he said "I'M GETTING THAT BABY 50/50 AND YOU'RE NOT TAKING HIM TO THAT DAYCARE WHERE HE'S AROUND YOU ALL THE TIME." So, I am scared to do anything. but I get anxiety everytime I come to our apartment together, I really want to move back home, I just am so confused and don't know what to do. I just want to be happy.

 

[daneuse27]

How long have you two been together and when did this behaviour of his start? It definitely sounds like he isn't respectful of your feelings or input on how things should go, and that's a very bad sign. Things should be equally decided between both of you and it shouldn't be such a struggle to get him to listen to your point of view instead of only considering his own.

I would tell him that if he wants to have a dog, you need him keep the hair on it trimmed so that the hairs aren't getting everywhere. If he's insistent on having her hair long, then he should be the one to make sure its vacuumed up every day so its not affecting you. You shouldn't be scared to talk to him at all; this is your home too and you have every bit as much say as he does.

 

[linz1988]

You sound like you dont know this guy at all you shouldn't be feelin like that! My daughters dad tried to talk the same rubbish so i gave her my last name and left him of the birth certificate! Im not having anyone tell me wether i can get a passport for my daughter!

 

[kaylacrouch93]

I am going through the same thing right now i am married though so its quiet a bit harder for me to just to say im done.. but i really want to leave I have two kids only one is biolicalily his but we was together before i had my first and is on the BC as daddy!. Im so scared of how my life is gonna turn out if i stay with him but i am scared to leave.. Mainly cause of my kids..

 

[modified]

My marriage broke up when I was 28 weeks pregnant. Do what's right for you and your baby - that doesn't have to be together with him

 

[kaitlyn_rose]

Oh girl. I'm so sorry :/ I left my daughters father early so it was easier for me. The way I see it, if your already picturing your life without him and your already questioning the relationship and your not happy and can't see the future together, in your head the decision is already made. It's just waiting for your heart to catch up. Sometimes it's hard to make choices like that. Whatever you decide to do, just know you have so much support

 

[Orlantha]

No joke, I was a total b**ch when I was pregnant, all the way up to when my son was born. My hormones were out of control and took me over! Just sayin'. Not sure if you're that way...

You are weird to your bf. He doesn't know what's happening with your body or with the baby. Neither do you. You have no idea what will happen once that beautiful baby decides to be born. How will your life change? What's going to happen? Why does everyone say it completely changes your life--when you like your life the way it was?

Are you the same to your bf as you were before you were preggo? Chances are, no, you are not. Maybe he wants his dog a little around a little more now because he misses his relationship with you.

Your baby is going to make you very happy, no matter what happens with your bf

I'm not trying to be mean at all. I love pregnant women and I love babies, but sometimes we are a bit irrational.

Being a single parent is so hard. Having been both single and partnered as a mom, I would estimate it is approximately a hundred times more challenging to be a single parent (unless grandma lives within a short drive and can watch baby when you need to make all the money in the household).

I don't know your situation. I'm just trying to tell you what I went through. And if I had written this post at 34 weeks, after the baby was born, I would attribute it almost completely to those pregnancy hormones!