Not sure what category this should go in!!

[oorweeistyin]

Hi there,

As the title says...I fit in to various categories....let me introduce myself, I am 40, been ttc for 35 months and had 2 mmc's. The last one 3 weeks ago

My OH is 41 (no children) and i have a ds who is 11.

I feel like i'm completely losing the plot!!!

We haven't asked for help as my OH is in the forces and for the last 2.5 years he has been abroad, so we were only seeing each other for a weekend or week every 2-3 months and didn't think any doctor would take us seriously.

I am now at the stage where I want to give up....I have so many emotions running through me, sadness, anger, disappointment and when I thought that things couldn't get any worse.......the SIL has just announced she is pregnant and told me on the same day that I started to miscarry. They weren't even trying either and that just hit me like a right hook from Mike Tyson.

My OH is not abroad anymore but he has just started a new posting in England and therefore we are not together all the time either.

I just needed to write this down as I feel that no one else could possibly understand!!! Sorry guys but now I have actually said it out loud....I feel a tad better.

Can anyone out there relate to this? Or am I just a psycho hormonally imbalanced b*tch???

 

[Princess Lou]

Hi. I can't relate to you for various reasons (not same age bracket/husband works at home/never had a BFP/I have been trying for 37 months so close in that respect).

I just wanted to say, you know you can get pregnant so that it is a positive sign, I understand that the end result is heartbreaking but things can be done to help - I had a friend who had a healthy baby boy then lost four baby boys from 20-28 weeks then had a healthy baby girl. She does't know how she was able to carry the first boy to full term and not the other four though.

If your hubby is in the forces can they not offer you marriage quarters whilst he is stationed in the UK? I understand this isn't always practical with children etc but if you are together more regular, the problem may be solved. I would still go and see the doctor about your struggles, they can still run tests etc to check that everything is working okay for you both and then suggest treatments for when your hubby returns.

Good Luck. X

 

[oorweeistyin]

Hi Princess Lou,

Thanks for the reply, yes it is a positive sign that we know that we can get pregnant but so frustrating when it ends that way......It's like you get all this hope for it to be snatched away and the emotions that come with it are heart wrenching.

We couldn't get quarters because we are not married, we have our own house here in Scotland and I have my job here. It may be a case of timing or it may just be that I am too old now. I have been referred for tests, so we will see what comes back. They won't take me as seriously as someone under 35 anyway, so i'm not holding out much hope.

I hope that you get a BFP soon xxxx

 

[readyformore]

So sorry to hear you're struggling.

I fit into many categories as well and sometimes I don't know where to post. I feel out of place here because I already have children, but I hate reading or posting on regular ttc forums because I am ltttc. The secondary forum is really slow and doesn't offer much suport because noone is on it often.
I really like the 35+ forum. Not everyone is ltttc, but a bunch are and they are very welcoming, you should try it. But, going through infertility twice always makes me come back here, at least to read if not post.
If there was a forum for 35+, ltttc with multiple children at home, I'd fit right in, lol.

There is also a loss forum that might be comforting for you.

I hope you are able to get a doc to take you seriously.