NTNP Cycling

[thestarsfall]

And I don't mean periods lol. I feel like I go through a cycle of really wanting a baby to not caring as much every cycle. Like right after AF I am like "well, we could use another month or two to get some more finances in order and lose more weight etc etc, so lets not try this month" and then 2 weeks later I am all baby fever and then I get closer to ovulation and it's like "OMG BABY WANTING" and then in the TWW I am flip flopping back and forth the whole time being like "urgh I hope I am" or "well if I am not that's cool too" and then AF will come and I will be like "well, okay, I guess"

right now I am in TWW land. And while I would be absolutely thrilled if I were pregnant, I am also kinda hoping I am not this month because DH got fired from his one job a week ago and isn't back to full time hours at his backup job and while I have a job, it's client based and I don't have many clients...but I just picked up another client based job but once again, I don't know how often I will actually be working. I love my work, so I like that aspect, but at the same time...I kinda just wanna get a full time hourly rate job and save up loads of money for a future baby and a house and stuff...

I think if I did get pregnant right now I would look for a close to full time job and try to juggle everything just so we'd have the money.

Argh...life.

 

[greenlady]

I know exactly what you mean. We have just moved down under (from the UK about 2.5 months ago) and we are still settling in, DH is still trying to find his perfect job, and I have just started a part time job. We are living upstairs from my parents until after Christmas at least, we have accommodation organised around February so we will definitely be moving out. But yeah circumstances and not perfect, but also I know everything will resolve itself too.

In the meantime DD is 2 and a half and I wanted about 3-3.5, max 4 years between my kids. And I'm conscious that getting pregnant could take longer than anticipated. So we decided I should come off the pill regardless, I've been off for 5 weeks and still no AF...

But anyway I'm the same I oscillate between actually hoping AF will appear and secretly thinking oh it would be nice if I was actually pregnant. If I could time it absolutely perfectly I would get pregnant around November-January.

All I do know is, there's never a perfect time, and whatever happens, you just do your best to make it work xx

 

[NtnpAndHappy]

I am going through the same thing!!! I am 21 and my partner is 23 and I go through a moment of "all I want is a baby" and then I go through feeling like "I don't know if a baby is good for me right now" then right before Af comes I am hoping for a BFP and when she shows I'm partially relieved and partially sad.

I am really happy with wanting to be a mother at this young age, but then of course I have my scares and wonder if I can do it, and wonder how my life and future goals will change... then I think of how many people do this and survive and I was unplanned. I stopped taking my BC in June, and the tww is getting easier each month, I think NTNP is definitely easier on my brain then actively TTC and getting disappointed. I have 10days before AF we didn't BD much this month so I dont think I'll be getting a BFP but I am secretly hoping I do.

 

[momof3bears]

I kinda do that too. The first part of cycle (AF and right after) I tell myself Im not gona stress about it and if it happens, it happens. I do try to make sure we "try" at least every other day while fertility is high. But by the time I am 6 or 7 dpo I start going nuts! Mostly because I am paying such close attention to every little thing and get to thinking it could mean it did happen. I need to be banned from buying pregnancy tests though! I wish I knew of a way to make myself stop thinking so hard about it sometimes.

 

[purplepebbles]

I kinda do that too. The first part of cycle (AF and right after) I tell myself Im not gona stress about it and if it happens, it happens. I do try to make sure we "try" at least every other day while fertility is high. But by the time I am 6 or 7 dpo I start going nuts! Mostly because I am paying such close attention to every little thing and get to thinking it could mean it did happen. I need to be banned from buying pregnancy tests though! I wish I knew of a way to make myself stop thinking so hard about it sometimes.

This is exactly what I do too!! I tell myself, just going to see how it goes, yet I'm on pregnancy forums, looking up different pregnancy related things on google, checking my ovulation and fertile days and making sure we BD every other day! Once I think I may have ovulated, I analyse every single twinge, pain, emotion until AF arrives. It is so hard not to be aware of anything and wish sometimes I didnt know or want to know so much about how my body works.

I think its only natural to feel a bit apprehensive whilst TTC/NTNP because it *could* happen and the rest of your life changes. Its being responsible for another person besides yourself that cant yet do anything for themselves. I swing between thinking 'do I really feel I can do this? Can we afford it? How will it change us as a couple?' etc etc but then I spend time with friends kids and think 'This is what I want' and sod the other things. I know it will be tough financially but its all to easy to put it off because of money!

Everytime AF arrives, I think 'Oh well never mind, same again next month' and it seems that family/friends who I've told we are TTC are more disappointed than I am! I dont want to get involved in charting etc, but am considering getting an opk ONLY to see when my fertile period is, as even though I am regular since coming off the pill, I worry that things aren't right down there. I know it could take a while to conceive as I was on the pill for a long time, but I'm impatient sometimes!

 

[Vicki_Cream]

This! Everything above - SPOT ON!!

 

[NtnpAndHappy]

I kinda do that too. The first part of cycle (AF and right after) I tell myself Im not gona stress about it and if it happens, it happens. I do try to make sure we "try" at least every other day while fertility is high. But by the time I am 6 or 7 dpo I start going nuts! Mostly because I am paying such close attention to every little thing and get to thinking it could mean it did happen. I need to be banned from buying pregnancy tests though! I wish I knew of a way to make myself stop thinking so hard about it sometimes.

This is exactly what I do too!! I tell myself, just going to see how it goes, yet I'm on pregnancy forums, looking up different pregnancy related things on google, checking my ovulation and fertile days and making sure we BD every other day! Once I think I may have ovulated, I analyse every single twinge, pain, emotion until AF arrives. It is so hard not to be aware of anything and wish sometimes I didnt know or want to know so much about how my body works.

I think its only natural to feel a bit apprehensive whilst TTC/NTNP because it *could* happen and the rest of your life changes. Its being responsible for another person besides yourself that cant yet do anything for themselves. I swing between thinking 'do I really feel I can do this? Can we afford it? How will it change us as a couple?' etc etc but then I spend time with friends kids and think 'This is what I want' and sod the other things. I know it will be tough financially but its all to easy to put it off because of money!

Everytime AF arrives, I think 'Oh well never mind, same again next month' and it seems that family/friends who I've told we are TTC are more disappointed than I am! I dont want to get involved in charting etc, but am considering getting an opk ONLY to see when my fertile period is, as even though I am regular since coming off the pill, I worry that things aren't right down there. I know it could take a while to conceive as I was on the pill for a long time, but I'm impatient sometimes!

Same here since off the pill I cant tell if I'm ovulating... My period is extremely regular 26 days no earlier no later and always 4 or 5 day af... but during my cycle I never see EWCM or the pain I have no clue... I might get an OPK to see if I am even ovulating, Ive gained weight recently so I think that might be effecting my ovulation not sure