NTNP/Done or taking a break from TTC

[AshleyButters]

Just looking for some chatter bugs!!!! I have been actively TTC for a year. I decided yesterday that I am done. I don't care anymore and I want to just take a break, or NTNP....

How do you NOT pay attention? I know my cervical mucus and I know my cycle. I just figured I would not take any temps or OPKs, and no supplements. We will just BD when we feel like it.

Any other advice?!

 

[jasminemarie]

Heya! I've been trying to find something like this! Seems everyone is so into tracking and all that stuff and I just have no clue and can't be bothered!
I have a 3 year old son, and we are NTNP for #2. It'll happen when it happens.
Unfortunately I don't have any advice since, like I said I have no clue about tracking and whatnot, but I'm good for a chat and going through the NTNP journey together!

 

[raine87]

DH and I have been trying for 10 cycles and I too am completely done. I am in the same boat though....I know my cycles even without temping. I get ovulation pains pretty bad so there is no denying or ignoring those. We are wanting to take a step back though and worry about the holidays and go from there. I'm up for good chatter too!!

 

[housefinch]

Just looking for some chatter bugs!!!! I have been actively TTC for a year. I decided yesterday that I am done. I don't care anymore and I want to just take a break, or NTNP....

How do you NOT pay attention? I know my cervical mucus and I know my cycle. I just figured I would not take any temps or OPKs, and no supplements. We will just BD when we feel like it.

Any other advice?!

I feel the same way, we have been TTC for a year and no luck so last month i put the apps and thermometer away and trying to not focus on it, but as you say I know my cycle so it's in the back of my mind of course! My goal is to go with what feels good, have fun, enjoy being outdoors and other hobbies - basically try not to obsess as I have been known to do! But here I am, wondering again if this will be the month

 

[MKaykes]

I'm in the same boat! I'd love to stop "trying" but just don't know how to do that. I want to kind of pay attention to my cycle so I know when to expect AF, but need to stop obsessing about temps, ovulating, and the terrible TWW!

I've been off the pill since the first of the year and actively ttc since after 3 months of NTNP, so I guess 7 months actively tying, and it is getting exhausting! Plus the disappointment every month I'd getting to be too much.

I'm going back to school in Jan, and really if it doesn't happen for us this month, if rather wait so I don't need to take a semester off, and I'm looking forward to a break!

 

[AshleyButters]

Hey Mamas Welcome to the thread!!
So this is what I have been doing to take a step back:

-On FB if I see a pregnancy announcement, I immediately unfollow/block
-I BD with hubby when I'm actually in the mood (not because I know I am fertile)
-Instead of laying down after my husband finishes, I get up and go to the bathroom
-As weird as it sounds, when I wipe I am not inspecting my toilet paper anymore. I try to "look" away so I am not obsessing over my cervical mucus
-I have stopped the notifications on my phone that alerts me to when I am about to get my period or my fertile time
-Have not used any vitamins, instead cups, opks or preseed
-Focusing on exercising or a hobby

One thing that I am still doing is getting acupuncture because I have a really great acupuncturist (she is almost like a counselor for me)

How are you girls holding up? I get pretty jaded some days, but I keep talking to myself saying I am done/on a break for now.

 

[jasminemarie]

Well, that's great your break is off to a good start it seems. Just keep up with hobbies and stuff to keep you busy. Who knows, maybe your BFP is closer than you think with you not stressing about it.
Oddly enough, even though I don't keep track of any of that stuff to begin with I'm still finding myself obsessing over it. Like every time we do it, I mark down a one week mark and a two week mark after, I'm wanting to do it all the time to up the chances (which, oddly, SO isn't in to)
And I just think about it half the day how weird and crazy it'd be! Haha

 

[raine87]

Just got done with AF and I'm usually ok until I get my ovulation pains.......that's when I obsess. I'm going to try to not remind my DH that we haven't BD in a certain amount of time too. We've tried the BD-ing every 2-3 days and we didn't have any luck and BD-ing every day just isn't feasible for us. We both work crazy hours. I'm going to try to loose a little weight too. I was reading that if you are over weight to try to loose just 10% of your body weight and it can greatly increase your fertility chances.

 

[MKaykes]

Seriously, when you think about how many women get pregnant unplanned, the lengths we go to seem kind of ridiculous don't they? I feel especially ridiculous laying there in bed with my legs in the air after we DTD.

It's hard for me, as two of my best friends are pregnant, I was really hoping to be following close behind. Instead I'll just enjoy watching their little ones (they are on #2).

I've been going to a yoga geared for infertility as well as general calming anxiety, so I'm going to stick with that, but no more temperatures or opks.

I love the idea of just enjoying time with DH and not forcing BDing.

I think focusing on hobbies is a great distraction! So, ladies, what are done of your hobbies? In a baker, but several months ago I started trying to cut back on my sugar and start working out so...it's been too long since I've made so much as a batch of chocolate chip cookies! I need to start baking more, DH would be happy 😊

 

[jasminemarie]

Yeah, honestly DTD every day just isn't a thing for us either, he goes to bed early to get up for work, and I have to stay up with Lucas until he goes to bed and half asleep BD just isn't good lmao.
My SIL and I will be doing some baking in a few days. Like, mass amounts haha!
And yesterday I had this weird epiphany while out with Lucas, I won't bore you with the details but I realized I can do a lot of things I thought I couldn't. And I want to enjoy it a little before "hitting the reset button" so to speak.

 

[raine87]

I cross stitch and quilt. Those are my big projects for Christmas presents too this year. I'm going to be turning my attention too to trying to lose weight. I've thought about doing yoga for infertility but Idk how well I could do that. I don't have the best balance. And now that it's cooler out I'm going to be Taking our dog on nice long walks. She's going to hate it. She fakes leg injuries when she is taken on too many or too long of walks.

 

[jasminemarie]

That is actually kinda funny, a dog so lazy it fakes injuries lmao!
I'm also an aspiring writer so I'm hoping to focus on that as well in the coming months.
Except... My boobs have been hurting real bad the past couple days it's weird. A lot of my period signs are the same as pregnancy signs so I feel like it's probably just my body playing tricks, but I guess we will see in a week or so it AF shows up. My body does like to mess with me a lot so I wouldn't be surprised.

 

[AshleyButters]

Hey girlies!!! I hope you don't think I am rude, I try to only come to check this thread every few days or so, WHICH is another way for me to chillax on the baby obsessing stuff.

Once I click on baby and bump, my mind focuses on baby stuff, so I am trying not to refresh B&B multiple times a day lol!!!!!

I love baking, but I too have been focusing on losing weight before jumping on the TTC wagon again.

So my hobby is to workout more consistently, and if I have "baby" thoughts, I try to think of other happy things.

 

[jasminemarie]

Of course we don't think you're rude! People have lives! Not everyone is a loser who constantly check BnB like me!

 

[MKaykes]

I agree Ashley, definitely not rude! I was actually thinking the same thing...that I need to log in to BnB less now that I've decided to NTNP. I could say we could expect a slower response time in this thread and we'll all be okay with it!

So...on the losing weight note, what are you ladies doing? I'm not exactly overweight (thankfully blessed with decent genes) but since I was about 25 I've slowly been putting on weight. I'm 32 now and put on about 25lbs since graduating college. In the last year I've lost close to 10 pounds but still want to drop another 5 or so. My biggest issue is most of my weight gain has been in my belly. I always thought my mom's little belly was thanks to my sister and me, but I don't have the "mom" excuse! I've had too many people ask if I'm pregnant, which when I'm trying to both lose weight and to get pregnant is really not what you want to hear or respond to!

What are you ladies doing to try to drop some pounds? I've purchased a couple Beach Body workouts (P90 and 21 DayFix). I've enjoyed the workouts, but can't seen to stick with it. I'd rather easy ice cream, lol!

 

[jasminemarie]

Well, uh. I'm actually pretty small. I'm only 120 pounds, my problem is I do have a little gut, and I am very out of shape and I'd love to get back into shape again and feel good about myself instead of counting the days and I get heavier and more out of shape ( I used to be underweight only 100-105lb) I gained a lot with Lucas, and then lost it all unfortunately. You'd think I'd have been happy but being underweight is just as bad for self confidence as over weight, people saying they wanna shove a hamburger down your throat, asking if having a baby is going to kill you etc. It wasn't by choice, I just couldn't gain. I was glad when pounds started to stick finally except it was all in my gut and nowhere else!! So I'd like to do it up a bit but I'm happy with my weight, I'd like to even put on a couple more maybe.

 

[raine87]

I am definitely in the overweight category. My goal is to lose 10% of my weight. I'm going to watch my calorie and carb intake. I'm also going to increase my water intake and decrease on my caffiene. I already don't drink soda, I haven't for several years. I want to just change my eating habits where they are healthier so more veggies and fruits and less fatty foods. But ya'll crazy if you think I'm giving up ice cream!

 

[jasminemarie]

Oh man how could ANYONE give up ice cream? I could find out I'm lactose intolerant tomorrow and you still wouldn't stop me! Same with cheese. Love cheese!

 

[raine87]

Lol I love cheese too. One time we ran out of cheese and my husband looked at me and seriously asked if something was wrong with me or if I was a clone. That just doesn't happen in our house.

 

[jasminemarie]

Cheese is expensive, so we don't always buy it, but when I see it on sale hell yeah! And then ya gone pretty fast haha!