OH Doesnt find me attractive pregnant!!!

[miss maternal]

Im feeling upset and rejected as we went round a friends house last night and he told them that he didnt find me sexy being pregnant which hurt me as he had a short affair 3 months ago. I also had a fling with someone I knew who still found me attractive pregnant who said im great pregnant and its a shame my ex doesnt realise it. I was flattered that he liked me for me but my ex says he was using me.
I still feel rejected by my ex for what he done to me and he said he finds it hard living with me as im always moaning and that im not normal.
I didnt used to fancy him when he was fat but I still made an effort to have sex with him and now he has lost weight it has gone to his head and he repays me like this.at a time when im vunerable and feeling hormaonal.

How are your men treating you being pregnant?

 

[Wobbles]

You back with him hun? Confused with OH & ex in your post.

I think he needs a fucking slap! Sorry but oh boy after everything he makes you feel like that and voices it infront of friends!!

 

[Layla]

aww hun, your OH is not worth all this upset. I cant belive what you have been through and put up with over the past few months.

What is the situation with your and your OH right now, are you still together? is he taking an interest in the baby?
Whats going to happen when you give birth, will he be bugging you every 5 mins to lose the baby weight etc? coz you wont need the extra stress of that.

I know that having a baby is a scarey time, but i think you need to look at your Oh and work out if he is really worth all this, he doesnt sound very nice or suportive towards you atall, and at this stage of the pregnancy he should be!

Sorry, i dont mean to come across harsh, im trying my best to word this nicely, i just worry that you are being put under unessary pressure, its not good for you

x

 

[Tezzy]

i agree with whats been said hun.. dont let him treat you like crap

 

[mickey]

I get treated like a princess!

My OH finds me very attractive and when I have cravings he goes round to the shop and gets me what I want and when I am hungry at night he gets up and prepares me something after my wish!

I get back massages, foot massages and am not expected to keep the flat immaculate (as this is really getting hard at the moment, although the flat is tiny!)

My OH is the best man in the world and I love him truly!

sorry, miss maternal, I know this won't help you, but I wanted to answer your question!

in my opinion men should appreciate we are going through all this for nine month to give them a baby!
and at last they were involved in making the baby as well!

I think the father of your baby does not act appropriate at all!

 

[Angel]

You shouldn't let him treat you like that,through both my pregnancies now my DH has been nothing but supportive and loving,he loves the bump and still finds me attractive.
Pregnant women even though we don't feel it, are beautiful annd deserve to be treated with respect from their partners.I hope you can figure this whole thing out,reading your other post it sounds as if your OH is not giving you what you need during this time.Goodluck

 

[Mango]

Missmaternal you deserve far better. I remember previous posts you wrote about your OH and things don't seem to be going as well as they could. I really think you should consider what YOU need and how his presence may be hindering that. Have the two of you ever considered counselling. It is a large step and can be quite difficult, but with a lil one on the way you may want to make one decision or the other soon.

 

[miss maternal]

aww hun, your OH is not worth all this upset. I cant belive what you have been through and put up with over the past few months.

What is the situation with your and your OH right now, are you still together? is he taking an interest in the baby?
Whats going to happen when you give birth, will he be bugging you every 5 mins to lose the baby weight etc? coz you wont need the extra stress of that.

I know that having a baby is a scarey time, but i think you need to look at your Oh and work out if he is really worth all this, he doesnt sound very nice or suportive towards you atall, and at this stage of the pregnancy he should be!

Sorry, i dont mean to come across harsh, im trying my best to word this nicely, i just worry that you are being put under unessary pressure, its not good for you

x

I have gone back to make a go of things as I do still love him and he has done up the nursary. We just seem to piss eachother off and he makes me feel like crap and even said he is worried I wont cope with the baby if I get post natal depression. I want to prove him wrong and I know I WILL be a good mum and cope with my baby. I just cant cope with his honesty and put down comments at the moment. He says I want to pick a fight with him all the time and that its my hormones but I have always been hard to live with. I just want him to respect me but he says that you earn respect.
He is making an effort with the baby and is nice when it suits him but where he is an only child he is selfish and thinks I should put him first and is jealous if I spend time with my family. Thats why I thought a family of our own would make him feel more wanted.

 

[Wobbles]

I could not have worded my reply as good as these girls have MissM.

I think you sound like a warm hearted person and he just doesn't deserve you and he doesn't deserve you to make excuses for him why you have tried again... hes threw it back in your face from what I can see.

Nice to see hes made having your first baby a happy one and filled you with confidence ... way to go to make you feel like shit before the babies even born. If you do find yourself down and blue I personally would assume from all this he has caused you the outcome.

Sorry if Im wrong in what I have said.

 

[marley2580]

Sorry to be so blunt, but what he is doing sounds to me like a form of domestic abuse. I really think you should try and find someone to talk to, even if it's somewhere like Women's Aid - they're not just there for women who's partners are violent.

 

[princess2323]

I get treated like a princess!

My OH finds me very attractive and when I have cravings he goes round to the shop and gets me what I want and when I am hungry at night he gets up and prepares me something after my wish!

I get back massages, foot massages and am not expected to keep the flat immaculate (as this is really getting hard at the moment, although the flat is tiny!)

My OH is the best man in the world and I love him truly!

sorry, miss maternal, I know this won't help you, but I wanted to answer your question!

in my opinion men should appreciate we are going through all this for nine month to give them a baby!
and at last they were involved in making the baby as well!

I think the father of your baby does not act appropriate at all!

i totally agree--- my hubby is the same way as mickey's ---- although he is starting to get a lil annoyed like when i want a back massage ---he's like ur taking advantage of me and im like ya maybe just a lil---but my back really hurts---lol so i give him a massage tooo to make up 4 it --- but he would never in his right mind call me fat--- he luvs my pregnant body--- and yes the boobs help too---- lol

 

[BurtonBaby]

I'm sorry to hear that MissM. Like it's not hard enough for us to adjust to our constantly changing bodies, he has to make it harder for you by criticizing you, and especially in front of friends? I need reassurance from my DH all the time. I've only started showing in the past couple weeks, and I already feel down about it. If he wasn't here to support me and accept and love my body, I would be a mess. I would try to talk to him calmly and rationally about it, even tho it can be hard sometimes when we get emotional. Tell him that the things he said, and his actions really hurt. And that this baby is 50% him, and that you're the one doing all the hard work to bring it here. Who knows, maybe he will come around. If not, I say that slap in the face Wobbles suggested. =)

 

[Wobbles]

Sorry to be so blunt, but what he is doing sounds to me like a form of domestic abuse. I really think you should try and find someone to talk to, even if it's somewhere like Women's Aid - they're not just there for women who's partners are violent.

I think I agree with marleys suggestion actually!

MissM how are you

 

[miss maternal]

Sorry to be so blunt, but what he is doing sounds to me like a form of domestic abuse. I really think you should try and find someone to talk to, even if it's somewhere like Women's Aid - they're not just there for women who's partners are violent.

That is so true Marley. I was referred to a councillor after all this shit happened and she told me that it was domestic abuse and she said not to move back but I felt I had to as I still love him and want to settle her with both parents. He is on trial though and if he is an arse I have places to go. I do think he just banters with me as he used to be fat ane I just say hey im pregnant when he says im fat.

Im up and down Wobbles and have told him how im feeling but this affair has destroyed my confidence as we are not sexually compatable and he went off with someone who he connected with when I felt down about my body.

 

[sweetsammi]

I am so sorry you are going through this sweetie. You deserve better. Pregnancy is a difficult time for all of us, making and bringin up a child is the most difficult job in the world and he should be understanding of this. Pregnancy is a magical and beautiful time in a woman's life and for him to try to ruin this experience for you is selfish. Your man should be there for you in every way possible. Giving you back massages, listening to you complain about all the niggles, making you tea, cleaning etc..Most of all he should be there everyday telling you what a wonderful mother you are going to be and that you look beautiful. My man does all of this. We are gonna feel paranoid and feel fat and haggered enough as it is carrying those babys around- If he cannot be appreciative of that then I would seriously reconsider if it is worth having this man in your life. I understand you want to be settled for you baby's sake and that you still love him. But if your man carries on when the baby is here the child is gonna sence mummy isnt happy and this will in turn upset him/her. Not to mention that i think love alone isnt always enough in a relationship-If it was all our relationships would be perfect! This man is bullying you and you need to be loved and supported. You need respect from him as a woman, a lover and a mother and at the minute hun you aint getting any of that. Personally it sounds to me like he treats you like this because deep down it is HIM who lacks the confidence and by putting you down it makes HIM feel better, like the bigger person which is wrong and a weakness in my opinion. You need that confidence of yours in order to bring your baby into this world, how dare he just come and take it! Im so sorry if any of this is harsh or has upset u. But you seem like you have a lot of love to give and i wouldnt waste it on him. Just remember you are beautiful and strong and dont let him or anyone else make you believe otherwise. Good luck xx

 

[mickey]

Personally it sounds to me like he treats you like this because deep down it is HIM who lacks the confidence and by putting you down it makes HIM feel better, like the bigger person...

for me it sounds like this as well!

 

[ablaze]

I am so sorry you are going through this sweetie. You deserve better. Pregnancy is a difficult time for all of us, making and bringin up a child is the most difficult job in the world and he should be understanding of this. Pregnancy is a magical and beautiful time in a woman's life and for him to try to ruin this experience for you is selfish. Your man should be there for you in every way possible. Giving you back massages, listening to you complain about all the niggles, making you tea, cleaning etc..Most of all he should be there everyday telling you what a wonderful mother you are going to be and that you look beautiful. My man does all of this. We are gonna feel paranoid and feel fat and haggered enough as it is carrying those babys around- If he cannot be appreciative of that then I would seriously reconsider if it is worth having this man in your life. I understand you want to be settled for you baby's sake and that you still love him. But if your man carries on when the baby is here the child is gonna sence mummy isnt happy and this will in turn upset him/her. Not to mention that i think love alone isnt always enough in a relationship-If it was all our relationships would be perfect! This man is bullying you and you need to be loved and supported. You need respect from him as a woman, a lover and a mother and at the minute hun you aint getting any of that. Personally it sounds to me like he treats you like this because deep down it is HIM who lacks the confidence and by putting you down it makes HIM feel better, like the bigger person which is wrong and a weakness in my opinion. You need that confidence of yours in order to bring your baby into this world, how dare he just come and take it! Im so sorry if any of this is harsh or has upset u. But you seem like you have a lot of love to give and i wouldnt waste it on him. Just remember you are beautiful and strong and dont let him or anyone else make you believe otherwise. Good luck xx

i agree with all of this!

 

[miss maternal]

Thanks SweetSammi.

 

[KX]

hope ur ok hun xxxx