OH doesn't want to TTC due to our age

[sjulias67]

I am 37 years old and OH is 43 years old. We both will be 38 and 44 in the next coming months. We have a ten year old DD. I lost my son at 18 weeks due to incompetent cervix on July 1st.

I wanted to TTC soon but OH doesn't want to. He feels that it would be too hard on all of us if the pregnancy goes to full term and the child has disabilities due to our age. He does have some health complications and smokes. I suggested we could do amino, but according to him that decision is also too hard and is not willing to TTC.

It is like I am fighting a lost battle.

 

[Indigo77]

I'm sorry.....

 

[dachsundmom]

 

[Wendyk07]

I'm so sorry hun. Is there no way he will change his mind?

 

[SuperAwesome]

Hugs to you!

Perhaps this is a good time for your OH to improve his health and quit smoking. It'd reduce the chance of defects, you know? Maybe then he'll feel differently (hopefully!)

 

[sjulias67]

I'm so sorry hun. Is there no way he will change his mind?

We had a big fight yesterday on it. I did try to convince him that the chances for a healthy baby are still 90% at age 38 and there are many women who have overcome IC and delivered healthy babies, but he is not agreeing for now.

 

[sjulias67]

Hugs to you!

Perhaps this is a good time for your OH to improve his health and quit smoking. It'd reduce the chance of defects, you know? Maybe then he'll feel differently (hopefully!)

I too wish, that he quits smoking and hopefully feels differently. But I too didn't want to lose time and deep in my heart I didn't want to start TTC with a fight, rather with positive thoughts.

I already have IC which is quite enough to add stress in the pregnancy then to keep on worrying about this.