OH finds sex a bit weird now - anyone else?

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - Third Trimester' started by zippy4, Mar 29, 2011.

  1. zippy4

    zippy4 Well-Known Member

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    Well my hubby admitted he finds sex a little weird now as I get bigger and kicks get stronger and belly moves etc (I'm 31+1 but baby is measuring about 34 weeks on scan). He says it's because it's much more real now that our baby boy is in there. I feel really down about this and feel like he is not attracted to me anymore even though he says he is. Anyone else in a similar situation? :(
     
  2. camerashy

    camerashy Well-Known Member

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    yep is perfectly normal hun ........can get very uncomfy + is a bit weird when ur mid-flow and baby starts to kick!!!!

    i really dont think its coz he loves u any less or ur not as attractive to him .....
     
  3. tuppance

    tuppance Well-Known Member

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    I think it is perfectly normal. With my OH and I it's the other way round, I find sex really weird and just don't ever want it and he doesn't find me being a pregnant a problem; it is all the kicks and moves etc that put me off. This doesn't mean one bit that I find him any less attractive it's just a block in my head when it comes to sex and now feels like there is three instead of just two people (just completely conscious that LO is there). I'm sure your OH is feeling that way too and it is completely nothing to worry about and doesn't mean he loves you less or finds you any less attractive :hugs:
     
  4. flumpsmummy

    flumpsmummy Well-Known Member

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    it is perfectly normal and at least hes been open and honest with you, some men just refuse to talk about it, doesnt mean you cant pleasure each other in other ways iykwim.
     
  5. JWandBump

    JWandBump Well-Known Member

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    For me and my OH its the other way around lol I cant stand sex, it hurts, its painfull, its uncomfy (for me the list goes on) :blush:
    I feel awful for saying no all the time :(
     
  6. Sazaroo

    Sazaroo Well-Known Member

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    My hubby's the same, he won't have sex as he's worried about hurting the baby and finds it weird knowing she's in there. I understand but it does make me feel unattractive (he's never been able to resist in the 12 years we've been together) And it's not like I can put on some sexy underwear and high heels to persuade him... That might be weird with my huge bump lol xx
     
  7. missy26

    missy26 Well-Known Member

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    Nope he says he can feel the weight of the bump now when we do it :blush: but doesnt weird him out yet but i do lean back a bit so the bump isnt on him plus she always seems to be asleep while we are doing it :blush:
     
  8. zippy4

    zippy4 Well-Known Member

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    Thank you for your lovely responses. I'm glad I'm not the only one because I was starting to feel really low about it all. Like sazaroo said he hadn't been able to resist me in the 6 years we have been together and I guess now I just find it hard because he doesn't want it right now. I just automatically feel unattractive as a result - but I guess hormones are probably making me feel worse xx
     
  9. nicole_

    nicole_ Aidy's Mummy

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    my OHs the same and ive just found him looking at suggestive pics of my mates on fb
    he wont even have sex with me when i ask, im so goddam hurt :(
     
  10. Lizzeh

    Lizzeh Aurora <3

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    My husband also admitted it's a lot less sexy but I'm no less lovable... :grr:
    Luckily I have some tricks that never fail to distract him! :laugh2:
     
  11. 5ara

    5ara Fin's mom

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    Don't worry, my OH hasn't been into sex since I started showing. He says "I'm not into threesomes", LOL! It doesn't bother me because I pretty much feel the same way, especially since I started feeling big kicks. It's just weird - it doesn't have anything to do with not being in the mood or being unattracted to him.
     
  12. Lilly12

    Lilly12 Mommy & #2 on board

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    My husband finds it odd too.
    Especially right now since the baby her head is very low.

    We haven't had sex in a while, it doesn't bother me and it doesn't bother him either.. although we both can't wait to have sex again.
    We both just find it weird to have sex right now with a baby in my stomach.

    We talk about it, so we know how we both feel and it's not that he finds me less attractive, just weirded out by her head being so low.. he doesn't want to poke her :haha:
     
  13. KandyKinz

    KandyKinz Pregnant with #3

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    My hubby ordinarily has a pretty low sex drive and would only ever get in the mood every 3 or 4 days... and it's gotten much worse in the last few months. It's been about 2 weeks since we've done anything at all and I've attempted and been shot down on several occassions during that time. I feel completely gutted! and extremely distanced from him as a result to the point where I don't even want to talk to him, be in the same room with him or even have him at the birth. I HATE how he's made me feel so awful and rejected and quite truthfully him not putting out is having a very very negative effect on our overall relationship.... which doesn't even feel like a relationship anymore. He's more like a glorified room mate then anything else now :cry:
     
  14. Sunday_girl

    Sunday_girl Leo's mummy

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    The opposite with me too, he only has to look down there and it starts to feel all sore and sensitive! Plus the baby seems to get really excited which is a TOTAL off put haha *_*
     
  15. zippy4

    zippy4 Well-Known Member

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    That's very much how I feel only maybe not as extreme. I still love him with all my heart but he doesn't understand how hurt and low I feel. I just find it difficult to accept that he no longer wants sex with me (not helped by my high sex drive since being pregnant). I feel more like a room mate right now. On the flip side I totally understand why he finds it weird but yet it still upsets me. Dam hormones xx
     
  16. nicole_

    nicole_ Aidy's Mummy

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    thats identical to how ive been feeling. i even said to him im more like your housemate then your girlfriend and some nights ive been so upset ive slept in the spare room as i just dont wana be in the same bed as him :(
     
  17. Jess812

    Jess812 Jacob & Connor <3

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    oh yes! ive only had sex like twice this year :cry: It just doesn't happen..... he said a while ago he doesn't feel right with baby been in there, that happened from when could feel baby/hard bump.
    Makes me feel awful an upset at times but he says don't be daft its just that he feels weird with having baby in between us! :shrug:
    But will make it up to me afterwards :haha:
     
  18. HippieJess

    HippieJess Mom to 1 sweet girl

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    My DH has a really low sex drive, we haven't had sex since we conceived. :blush: When I told him the doc suggested sex to jumpstart labor I thought he might actually go for it since we haven't dtd in 9 months. Instead he laughed & said "uh, nope". Of course I got upset & feel like its me (even though its probably because of the baby). So then he says "we'll talk about it if you don't go by your due date". My doc is already talking about induction which my DH thinks is a better idea then having sex. :dohh:
     
  19. stomp110

    stomp110 Well-Known Member

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    I hate sex now... As if it isn't painful enough then you get kicked and a foot in your rib haha... Not for me anymore x
     
  20. Inge

    Inge Leo and Jamie

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    Im the one that finds it wierd. Im so uncomfortable and it gives me cramps in my bump now so OH wont have sex with me anymore :haha: Im also getting hardly any pleasure from it at all. Even if I "do it myself" still nothing :shrug: anyone else not enjoying it? Hes saying we should wait til our anniversary in August :wacko: No way am I waiting that long :haha:
     

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