On the road again graduates

[Carybear]

How precious left... He is just gorgeous!

Wow! Red! Can't believe how close you are getting... Now much longer for you either Starry... and I love the name Hannah

 

[Starry Night]

Aw, Left, he is so wee and precious. I love his scrunchy little face. Newborns make the best facial expressions. I can't wait for my turn to come.

Still feeling under the weather. Tried to eat some lunch today but it didn't go over well. I wasn't sick but it just tasted blech and is sitting heavy. And I'm so dizzy. Going on day 4....

 

[rayraykay]

Left- what a birth story. Man oh man. I am so glad Sean is here safe & sound. Labor is not for the faint of heart! Haha, women are so amazing. Our bodies are incredible. How are you feeling?

Starry- I hope no news is good news as well for your GD test. I would imagine if they haven't called you yet it's probably good news. I am so sorry you've been sick. I hope you start to feel better soon.

Red- 33 weeks! Enjoy the time.. as I know you are. Even tho I am so happy to have Sloane here, I do sometimes miss feeling her inside me. There is something so special about that- it's a bond only you and your baby have. No one else. So cool.

Cary- As usual thank you for the support. How are you? How is DH?

Skye- Hi!!!! I hope you're doing well.

Anchor- Hi! Love to you and your precious baby Evelyn!

AFM- Sloane will be 12 weeks on Tuesday. She rolled from her tummy to back for the first time on Wednesday. That was insane. She also laughed for the first time at me singing her Bingo last night. It was to die for. She also cries real tears now. So heartbreaking! Time seemed to creep by when I was pregnant and now I wish it would slow down.

Love to everyone. xoxoxo

 

[skyesmom]

awww Left!! he's so so precious!

and Starry - Hannah is a beautiful name! I also like that it's a palindrome, that you can read it both from left to right and vice versa... lol sounds funny but i like symmetrical names (and still named my angel Skye which is not symmetrical at all!)

Rayray - thanks for checking up! so so sweet to hear Sloane is making her first big discoveries and achievements, i think those "first everythings" really make your heart melt in a way which can't be described and told.
and you also answered one of the questions i've been asking myself for a while, too.. after mc i of course missed the feeling of the baby inside my tummy, and was wondering if you still feel that after the birth, too, even if they're safe and sound and healthy in your arms, as it's such a particular and unique feeling! so, you do!

Red! 33 weeks!!!!! eeeek!! it's gonna be in no time!!

Cary, Anchor and Topanga: my greetings and love to you! i hope you're doing fine girls!

afm, working and feeling much better now. my angelversary passed, only OH and i remembered and it was fine he was really really really sweet and took me out for a dinner and then a little trip to the beach which was totally unexpected and it really really made my day! he's just the best!

 

[rayraykay]

skye- I am so sorry about your loss. Angelversaries are tough. Although I am so happy that your OH remembered and treated you with loving kindness. I remember feeling that way after I had my mc too. And yes, I do miss feeling Sloane inside my belly sometimes. It's odd, to feel something then have it be gone. It's nice that I have her where I can see her, anything that comes up seems easier to fix when she's on the outside, but the worrying never stops, haha. Welcome to motherhood my momma has told me.

 

[Left wonderin]

Ray ray you have such a great way of describing things ! That's exactly it now they are here I feel I have some hope of fixing the issue that arises ! When they were inside its all so totally out of your control . Skye anneversaries are so hard , its so lovely that you marked it and your oh remembered and minded you xxxxx I hope you also minded yourself , anniversaries bring up so many emotions, feeling and memories xxxx

 

[Starry Night]

skye - Angelversaries are tough. How wonderful that your OH participated in it with you and was there to help you through and make you feel special. As time passes the emotions on those dates get less raw even though you never really forget.

This rainbow is due right smack in between three angelversaries (2 m/c anniversaries and 1 angel due date...it is a tough week...) so I am hoping to find some way to remember my lost babies when this one is born. Maybe include them in the FB annoucement.

afm - appointment went well. No GD! Little girl was bashful and I had to force myself to not panic with my OB couldn't find the heart beat right away. The doctor was hemming a bit and I right away said "she was kicking me the whole way here!" I was still relieved when she found the heart beat. I'm at 2 week appointments now so I'm hoping that will help time pass.

 

[skyesmom]

thank you for your support ladies! it means the world to me!

this angelversary went quite smoothly compared to the last year (it was the first one for this loss, so all still very very raw and I was on a business trip! sucked BIG time!!)
but yes, i definitely am so so lucky to have the OH i have... the best man ever
i was happy it was weekend so i didn't have to work and so on... otherwise i think i'd taken some time off anyway as being forced to put up a pretty face is the worst for me. i actually woke up feeling quite well to my surprise, and both OH and I had a couple of hard moments but as we were "allowed" to show our feelings (there were no people around) and talk about them, it all went away smoothly...

if we were at work or ie. a drink with friends and had to keep up a smiley face, it would have been way way harder! like this, it was perfect and i was happy to see that the time did heal some wounds, although we never forget.

Starry that is a tough angelversary schedule there in a week! but your LO arriving exactly then feels like she's a present from all your angels, like all of them saying hello to you and letting you know they are always close to their sister... even with their angelversaries honestly, the romantic person i am, i just can't believe this is a coincidence

 

[Starry Night]

I am hoping it's not a coincidence too. My first miscarriage actually happened on the anniversary of the day DH proposed to me and ever since then I've been hoping to "redeem" that day, that month, to the happy time it used it be in my mind.

 

[Left wonderin]

I had Sean on the 22nd of February but was brought in for induction on the 21st . The date of my first ov after mc ( checked ff ) was the 21st of feb 2013 ! Weird or what

 

[Starry Night]

I had a dream that this one will come by section on the 21st of May. I doubt that will happen though. My doc wants me to VBAC so a section a week before the due date would mean something had changed and not a good change and I don't want that.

 

[Carybear]

I'm having a difficult night... I want to be a mom so much... I should totally write this in another thread because you all deserve to hear good things and not complaints, but it just sucks... Most of the time I can keep it to myself and go on with life... But it was 16 months today that I mc and it is hard for me not to wonder why not me????
I'm sure my time will come but I'm tired of the waiting...

Sorry ladies.. Don't have too many pity parties but I guess tonight just feels like a good time to have one...

 

[Starry Night]

You are more than welcome to pity-party here. That desire to be a mom is such a beautiful thing so of course it will hurt when it doesn't happen. We can't always be strong. I keep thinking of you (and Skye) and hoping that you will get your precious babies soon.

 

[Left wonderin]

I'm having a difficult night... I want to be a mom so much... I should totally write this in another thread because you all deserve to hear good things and not complaints, but it just sucks... Most of the time I can keep it to myself and go on with life... But it was 16 months today that I mc and it is hard for me not to wonder why not me????
I'm sure my time will come but I'm tired of the waiting...

Sorry ladies.. Don't have too many pity parties but I guess tonight just feels like a good time to have one...

Cary I would be sad to think you couldn't share how you are feeling with us . You have been so supportive to all. Of us even when your journey has been difficulty . I know that yearning and it cannot be ignored its like a ache deep down . Please share how you are feeling and doing and let us be here for you even if its only with a listening ear

 

[Carybear]

Thanks so much.

 

[rayraykay]

Cary- first of all times a million. This is one of the many times that I wish I could hug you in person. I am a big believer in hugs and I love giving and receiving them. haha.

Second of all- ALWAYS feel free to come here and tell us those things. That's what this is, a support thread. I am always in awe of how incredibly supportive you've been to us even when you journey to a rainbow is still in progress. sending you love today & always

 

[RedWylder]

I'm with the other ladies, Cary. Never feel like you can't share here. We all remember the pain of trying to concieve far to well and we'd be poor friends if we couldn't support you even though you've graciously supported us for the past 9+ months. Hang in there. You'll get your moment.

 

[skyesmom]

Cary!! i hear you! and i second all the other ladies here! i've pity-parted here recently myself, big time! and receiving all the support and understanding from all of you has really made a difference for me.

as rayray says, i'm also a great believer in hugs, and if i could hug you instead of typing, i would. i so understand this yearning in your heart, when all the rest that you do no matter how it's going, gets just a relative importance and it all feels senseless because you can't get your baby.

those moments come sooner or later, no matter how strong you are (and trust me, you're one of the strongest women i've seen around here. all of you here).

these nights come because it is simply effing HARD. hard hard hard hard. and you can't always be having good days and easy heart when it's hard. and feel defeated and discouraged and wanting to give up because it is so unfair.

and when it gets that tough, there really is no need for giving you an extra load by staying alone... that's why we are here, to support each other!

the day i see you posting your BFP announcement here, i'll do a happy dance as if it were my own!

and trust me, they're just around the corner

 

[Topanga053]

The other girls have already said it all, but Cary, I'm so glad you're here and sharing with us! We're all here to support each other, no matter where we are on our journey!! I am so sorry you were having a hard day. I hope the sorrow has past for you and your heart is a little bit lighter today. You are an amazing woman and your rainbow will be just as amazing as you someday! In the meantime, ALWAYS come here if you need shoulders to cry on! We have plenty of them and we've used your shoulder plenty of times!

Love to all of you amazing girls!! xoxo

 

[Carybear]

Ladies! I feel so loved! Thank you all so much.

My neice is pregnant and due May 2nd with number four. She doesn't take care of the first three. I guess that is what made me lose it.. Saw her message on facebook.

I know my time is coming (and yours too Skye) and when it does I will be the happiest woman in the world. Anywho... to you ladies and precious rainbows.