**One For Mums To Be & Those Already Mummies...Breastfeeding Advice**

[Elephant13]

Hiya Everyone,
I know this is very early to be posting but I saw my midwife last night and she was talking me through all the stages etc and asked me to have a think about a few things. One of which is breastfeeding. Originally I was against it, purely because I don't want feeding to come down soley to me, myself and my partner both want to share equal baby duties 7 bond with our baby in all ways.
However I have read a little and I am obviously aware of the health benefits to a newborn but I was wondering if anyone had any tips. I don't want to be frowned upon for not breastfeeding and my partner suggested maybe expressing/pumping milk so that he can help with feeds too & also making it easier when were out and about.
I know this will have plenty of split opinions but I was just intrigued to see if anyone else had given it a thought and if there was anyone feeling the same as me?!
I know I have plenty of time to think about it but I'd really just be happy to hear a little feedback from anyone whose "been there done that" so to speak, or anyone feeling like me & a little torn!
Thanks in advance ladies!xxxx

 

[Celesse]

Feeding is just one of many many jobs that need doing with a new baby. I was fine doing all the feeds cos I could assign other jobs as daddy jobs. Dads still help with feeding, they help you get comfortable, take the baby afterwards to burp them.

I don't think that is easier taking bottles out and about at all. Its much harder. You have to transport the bottle, get it right temperature, you can run out. Where as boobs go everywhere with you and are always ready to feed at the right temperature.

Exclusively expressing is a lot of work and hard to maintain. Its much easier just to feed straight from the breast.

 

[bther]

I'm a trained breastfeeding peer supporter so my views are biased. I will personally be breastfeeding for as long as baby wants to. Just so you're aware, if you choose to pump and give expressed milk by bottle, if you do it in the first 6 weeks you run the risk of nipple confusion and baby not latching onto your breast (getting milk from a bottle required much less effort from baby).

I loved the bond it gave me and my son and all the health benefits are obviously great! Also saved money on formula/bottles etc which is blummin' expensive. And it burns calories so you spring back into shape quicker.

Your partner can help out in other ways. He can take baby while you nap between feeds or he can baby wear/have skin to skin to get a bond going. He can also just look after you and make sure you're well hydrated and fed. There will be plenty of time to help with feeding once you start weaning.

Just my two cents!

 

[Hansie]

I am also a lll leader (la leche league) so I am also biased. Of course not that I judge anyone at all! Like pp's have said there are lots of other bonding jobs daddy can do. Breast milk is not best it is perfect for your baby and formula is not a close second and can damage your babies digestive system. Not to mention the health benifits of breast milk/ breastfeeding for you and baby. (These are facts remember!) breastfeeding is an amazing bonding experience and really the easiest option! (I have spoken to many mums who ff their first and bf their second and can not believe how much easier breastfeeding is) also if daddy is going back to work will he want to be doing all the night feeds when you are going to be in your jammies all day and he has to go to work? ( again of course I don't know your partner ) but I know how I would feel. Do you want to go downstairs in the night 3/4/5 times when you could roll over and wop your your boob out and go back to sleep.

These are facts remember not my opinion

I would say don't make a decision apart from to see how you feel. It is what boobies were ment for and will make you feel a million dollers!

 

[lovelylaura]

With both of my girls i tried and failed to BF, i had little support from professionals and knew no one who BF. My advice to you is get a much information as possible. Its not as simple as put them on your boob and of you go. And if you are doing it for the benefits of BF then definitely think about expressing, from what ive read its hard work but its definitely worth it. This time i will try again and hope to succeed, however if it doesn't work i will be expressing.

 

[Elephant13]

Thanks for your feedback ladies. Sometimes when you read online you don't always get real peoples feedback so its nice to hear peoples opinions.
My only other worry was I will have to go back to work after 3 months and was anxious about how I would go about it then if I decided to breast feed. Any of you have any tips on that?
Thanks for your advice already! x

 

[Elephant13]

With both of my girls i tried and failed to BF, i had little support from professionals and knew no one who BF. My advice to you is get a much information as possible. Its not as simple as put them on your boob and of you go. And if you are doing it for the benefits of BF then definitely think about expressing, from what ive read its hard work but its definitely worth it. This time i will try again and hope to succeed, however if it doesn't work i will be expressing.

Thanks Laura, I was hoping to hear stories like yours as I am aware that for everyone it isn't easy. One friend in particular was distraught when she could bf and she felt like a bad mum because it is something that is meant to be natural. Thanks for sharing your experience with me! x

 

[Hansie]

It's not easy for everyone but less than 3% are physically unable to Breastfeed. It's about getting good support, persistence and percervience (sp?).i know a lot of mums who have pumped when they have gone back to work, your employer have to provide you with a private room to pump and a place to store the milk by law xxxxxx

 

[bther]

Go pop into some breastfeeding groups before baby comes and chat to some to the helpers there. As Hansie said, good support is a must. Once you've got positioning and attachment nailed it's easy!

 

[Hansie]

With both of my girls i tried and failed to BF, i had little support from professionals and knew no one who BF. My advice to you is get a much information as possible. Its not as simple as put them on your boob and of you go. And if you are doing it for the benefits of BF then definitely think about expressing, from what ive read its hard work but its definitely worth it. This time i will try again and hope to succeed, however if it doesn't work i will be expressing.

Sounds like you had rubbish support be persistent with hp's and seek the right support before you have the baby maybe? I think its criminal how little support some midwives and health visitors and even doctors give. They are clueless a lot of the time.

 

[VJean]

I went back to work at 12 weeks and was able to continue bfing my baby. I nursed her in the am, pumped twice at work, then nursed her in the evening/night. We cosleep so sometimes it felt like she ate all night, but it helped keep my supply up and I slept thru it. She will be 1 tomorrow and I just stopped pumping yesterday. She still bfs morning, evening and night. I wouldn't do it any other way!

 

[jkbmah]

Hi just to add in my own experience. I struggled to get DD to latch on as I have inverted nipples (and hospital was very warm ). Em needed to feed and had jaundice and so eventually the midwives in the hospital told me to give her a bottle of expressed milk, after that any chance of latching on had gone. I do wish I had the opportunity to see a breastfeeding consultant to help (it was the weekend apparently so no-one around). However I did exclusively express for about 9 weeks and it is very hard work. You get all the sterilizing faff plus you get even less sleep as you have to express at night too!

All that being said, I'm glad I did what I could. I'm glad OH could help out with night feeds, however I do still feel like had I been able to BF as normal, it might actually be easier than steralizing, getting up going downstairs to warm previously expressed bottles etc.

Also from what i understand BFing takes longer (sometime up to an hour or so) whereas bottle feeding (either EXP or formula) is quicker as the milk comes out faster & straight away.

I will be trying again this time to BF but I doubt I would exclusively express for as long this time if I am unable to BF.

not sure if any of this is of any help

 

[Lois22]

Please don't feel pushed though. I didn't Breastfeed and I don't feel guilty for not. Do whatever is best for you.

Xx

 

[Elephant13]

Thanks again for replies.
With my job I work in an office with 2 men, I run all the secretarial duties and only have a lunch break that has to be taken at a certain time, whether by law or not they have to give me a room they are a small company and I am the only female working here right now so would have to discuss with them and work something out to suit me. Thanks very much for all your feedback xxx

 

[armywife11]

You have so many options.. You can breastfeed and pump, you can give solely formula, you can solely pump, and you can give breastmilk when present and formula when away. I know people who have done all of these. You just need to do what you feel is best.

Daddys can help in a 1000 other ways!

I myself solely breastfed (we did struggle at first). My daughter refused to accept a bottle and to be honest I didn't push the matter because for me it was just easier to let her get it from the source. I was also a stay at home mom so she could be with me at all times which I admit made it easier for me to do that.

 

[Celesse]

You can combination feed as well if it suits when you go back to work. Its a little harder to maintain supply and you need to spread out the breast feeds as much as possible, but giving both formula and feeding from the breast is also an option. It doesn't have to be all or nothing and every breast feed counts.

 

[Sun_Flower]

I was one of the 3% then I guess, my milk never came in after nearly 3 weeks, I had lots of support but no-one picked up the fact that my severe PPH and subsequent low iron levels could have been the reason why. Because of all the stress surrounding it, my guilt for formula feeding, my daughter losing too much weight etc, my first three weeks with my daughter were horrendous. This time round I'm going to try again, but if it doesn't work I'm not going to beat myself up about it, I'd rather treasure the early weeks with my new baby. Formula is not poison, yes it's less convenient but you get used to it and get it down to a fine art so it doesn't take much time at all. My daughter hit her milestones on time, is vastly ahead with her speech, and has had no health problems other than the usual cold once in a while. You being happy, content and not stressed is JUST as important as how you choose your baby. As long as they're fed and content, that's what matters xx

 

[Celesse]

I was one of the 3% then I guess, my milk never came in after nearly 3 weeks, I had lots of support but no-one picked up the fact that my severe PPH and subsequent low iron levels could have been the reason why. Because of all the stress surrounding it, my guilt for formula feeding, my daughter losing too much weight etc, my first three weeks with my daughter were horrendous. This time round I'm going to try again, but if it doesn't work I'm not going to beat myself up about it, I'd rather treasure the early weeks with my new baby. Formula is not poison, yes it's less convenient but you get used to it and get it down to a fine art so it doesn't take much time at all. My daughter hit her milestones on time, is vastly ahead with her speech, and has had no health problems other than the usual cold once in a while. You being happy, content and not stressed is JUST as important as how you choose your baby. As long as they're fed and content, that's what matters xx

That 3% figure is based on a study done of a native population of somewhere where everyone breast feeds as there is no option to formula feed. The point a lot of people miss is that a lot of women and babies within that subject group will have died and not had the interruptions to nursing that women in the western world have.

If you take your own example of a PPH, well chances are that in the study that the statistic is based on you would have died from the PPH and therefore wouldn't have been nursing to be included in the figures. And you are indeed correct that a PPH and low iron can cause low milk supply.

I do wonder if you had the correct support though. If you say your milk hadn't come in after 3 weeks what were you feeding your baby? If you were giving formula then your breasts won't have been getting the stimulation needed for the milk to come in. If the demand wasn't there then the supply would not be there either as breast work on a demand first supply second basis.

With my son I had a PPH and a late case of retained products leading to infection. I had terrible supply with my milk. But I was able to increase that supply (eventually) with the aid of domperidome and a lot of expressing. He was a 14% weight loss. I had similar issues with my daughter of very low supply and my milk taking ages to come in. She was an 18% weight loss. And it all took a lot longer than 3 weeks.

BTW, I'm not posting this to have a go, but the "I didn't have enough milk" myth is very damaging. A woman truly believes she didn't have enough milk, tells pregnant women this, then when those women go on to have their babies they remember this. And when certain things happen they believe they too don't have enough milk even though its another issue which could be over come.

 

[Sun_Flower]

When I say my milk didn't come in - I had milk, but it was only fore milk, I wasn't producing the calorie rich hind milk which is the important part. I demand fed round the clock for three weeks, it made no difference. She lost 15% of her birth weight, and no one could explain why I wasn't producing anything of decent quality. Her stools never went through the change that happens when your milk comes in and they start receiving the calorie/ fat rich full milk (going from green to yellow), I never leaked or felt full or had anything come out in a stream like all of my breast feeding friends did/ do have.

I've done the UNICEF baby friendly breast feeding course, I know the biology behind it, know what a correct latch looks like, know how to hand express, know all he benefits etc. But that was of no use to me when the quality wasn't there. Switching to formula was the best thing I ever did, my baby was satisfied, content and thriving, I was no longer stressed. I felt guilty at the time, and no mother should feel guilty for feeding their baby, which is why I always try and tell people my experience, because a lot of the time all you get is how breast feeding is the only good way, and if you do anything else you're failing your child, or simply 'weren't trying hard enough' which is just wrong xx

 

[linz143]

With DD I tried pumping and giving in a bottle at 5 days. Dh wanted to help and my nipples were killing me. So I pumped and bottle fed for 2 days. After the two days I tried to bring her back to my breast and she'd drink a minute or two then start screaming where she had a perfect latch before. I battled this for a whole week before I gave up and exclusively pumped and bottle fed until she was 12 weeks old. After that we switched to formula because pumping every 3 hours and listening to the baby wake up and cry when you have just let down to the pump means you have to keep pumping. If you stop it's nearly impossible to get another let down. And waking up to feed her and having another scheduled pumping session in one hour when she's sleeping was torture. This time no bottles for at least a month. If DH wants to help he can hold the baby and change diapers. But please don't think that exclusively pumping is a good solution. It's an absolute nightmare.