Only just begun... and already discouraged

[berwar]

I'm new to the BabyandBump thread and discovered it while searching for trying to conceive forums. So....Hello All!! After reading the threads I am really starting to feel at home and ready to introduce myself.

Just rounding out the second month of actively ttc and after a negative pregnancy test following some of what I THOUGHT were pregnancy symptoms, I am definitely feeling bummed.

Here's a little backstory: DH and I got pregnant with our daughter by complete accident in 2011. I had my mirena removed (for medical complications) and my doctor told me to start my pill again after I start my period. 1 month later I found out I was pregnant. This was especially shocking to me since I had tried for 6 months to get pregnant with my ex-husband to no avail.

Our daughter is now 2 and we are ready to take that step again, but I worry a lot about whether we will be able to get pregnant when we actively try. Having never planned a child, a lot of this information is completely new to me and I am learning a lot from reading the board.

I'm 2 months in and I worry constantly about infertility and wonder if I am pregnant. I know it seems super silly, but I started taking the pill very "lax" 2 months prior to us trying and nothing happened. Now, I've been charting my cycle but am really having trouble figuring out my ovulation due to irregular periods (28-36 days). AF should arrive as late December 9 and if so, I plan to start OPKs. I know its silly to worry so soon but I read a statistic that said 60% of people conceive in the first 3 months! Man, that is some serious pressure!

Anyway, hoping to make friends on the board, those who are new and those who are veterans to this board. Feel free to pass along any advice and well wishes! Looking forward to knowing you all better!

 

[supersherwolf]

Even before I got married, I was worried that I would be the one who couldn't have kids, the infertile one. I've been married for 6 months now and still trying, it worries me everyday that I could never have kids(even though I'm perfectly healthy, with regular periods), I think it's just pressure that we as woman all put on ourselves because of constant thinking or maybe pressure from friends and family. Your worries are completely normal and every woman on this board probably has the same thoughts as you.

Good luck on your TTC journey, hope it's a blessed one. Try to find ways to make this process as relaxing as possible, you don't want it to take over your life. & welcome!

 

[berwar]

You are so right supersherwolf! Its comforting to hear it from someone else! I am really hoping this board helps me relax and enjoy the process more. And it really helps meeting others who are TTC. I don't know anyone personally who is currently TTC and it makes for a very lonely process.

 

[siempre]

berwar! we are the same!
I have also only just begun. Month #2 just failed for me as of this morning, and like you, I thought maybe this was really the month! It's ridiculous, only 2 months and I feel totally discouraged and like I must have a major problem!
I worry all the time that we are going to the couple to need IVF or frankly never conceived at all. I work in health care (actually I work in the NICU) so I'm exposed to babies and pregnant ladies EVERY day. Mostly it doesn't bother me, I'm busy and if I'm not thinking about my own issues it's better. But every once in awhile, like when I hear of ANOTHER accidental conception that was undesired, it's a hard day….
I also look at the statistics and start to worry…60% in first three months…am I already in the minority? That can't be good….
My sister has endometriosis and had to have a tube and ovary removed. She's not tried to conceive. In my paranoia, I have now self-diagnosed with endo also and have convinced myself that every twinge and cramp is further evidence of this. We are so healthy and not that old (33), I have completely regular cycles, and definitely ovulate based on temps and OPKs and I have pretty obvious ovulation pain; so why are we not the couple that has the "accident" or gets pregnant on the first try!? There's no explanation or answer to that that satisfies me.

I feel that I must be a very impatient person. I see so many women on here that have been trying for years and I don't know how I would be able to handle that.

On to December cycle I guess….

 

[berwar]

Siempre, it sounds like we have a lot in common as far as mindset goes. I dunno how you manage to work in the NICU! I am baby crazy without beinf surrounded by them all day!
I know what you mean about the infertility. After AF I find myself online looking at secondary infertility symptoms and causes and diagnosing myself!
On the bright side, you have a lot in your favor. A cycle like clockwork! I wish I was that lucky. I really struggle with when I ovulate, when to test, when ill start. Im gonna start OPKs next cycle after I get my period.
For a silver lining: I am reminded of a funny story from when i was in my early 20s. One time my two best friends and I were talking about our periods being late. The more we talked the more anxious we all got about being pregnant! We went to the store and bought 3 tests and tested togetger. they were all negative. And thats when our thoughts shifted from "Am I pregnant?" to "WHY am I NOT pregnant?" Lol! ll never forget that experience because it shows the true nature of women and how we are all similar in our concerns about pregnancy and conception.
Sending baby dust your way. Would be glad to be a ttc buddy for you in the future!

 

[MrsHscott]

Morning ladies!

I know it's really hard but try not to feel discouraged you are both doing all the right things and when you start to worry/panic the whole process totally takes over and the pressure builds which isn't fun at all

Myself and OH have been trying to concieve for 18months now so I totally understand how disheartening a BFN each cycle can be

Be great to keep up to date with you ladies and I'm wishing you all the luck in the world that you'll receive your BFP soon! In the meantime try and relax and enjoy practicing! I know my hubby is in his element at the moment lol xxxx

 

[odouglass]

I just started TTC after being released by my neurosurgeon after a spinal fusion surgery. However, right as I started TTC and was ovulating both DH and I got sick- I still have the flu and DH is getting better. My best friend found out that she is pregnant and I am very happy for her but also jealous. I've always worried that I wouldn't be able to have kids and that would absolutely crush me! FX and baby dust to all.