Overwhelming sadness

[Becktoria]

Not been on here for a while. Just need somebody to talk too who understands how I feel. I've had a terrible few weeks. As some of u know, lost my daughter at 36wks in July, she was stillborn, then had a mmc @ 10 weeks in feb. Now have blocked tubes
I recently went back to work which was extremely difficult, Im front line staff and deal with all walks of life and working with registrars, seeing all those new born babies in work has killed me. Also 1 of the girls who works with me is pregnant, my first day back and she's sat on the next desk going on about her pregnancy and labour etc. I still find it very difficult to be around pregnant women after losing my daughter , I just thought she was so insensitive. My best friend also pregnant and seeing her growing bump and Facebook status on pregnancy, it makes me so sad, angry, jealous. I Thought I was doing so well but out of nowhere this suffocating sadness and jealously has crept up on me and hit me full force. I don't want to feel like this, I want to be happy but I don't think I can even begin to heal until I'm holding a baby. Also me and my husband have been rock solid but we haven't been getting on great lately. I feel so lonely like nobody can hear me or understands.

Sorry for the miserable update I just needed to vent a bit xx

 

[sjbno1]

Hi Hun, I have no experience of what you have been through but I wanted to give you a big that girl does seem so insensitive

I cant imagine how you must feel but hope that things start looking up soon, could you speak to your hubby or maybe see someone to talk to? x

 

[Bugbabe77]

Didn't want to read and run - wanna send u lots of hugs. I also wanna echo what sjb says - is there not anyone u could go and talk to? A bereavement counsellor or someone? Maybe u and ur dh could go together.

 

[sarahlou1985]

big hugs Didn't want to read and run just to offer support, it does get easier, if I can offer any hope at all then it is that you can conceive so it is just a waiting game, good luck and i'm very sure you will have your little bun very soon xxx

 

[Sammysmummy]

Becktoria I am so sorry for your loss and I'm glad you have somewhere to express how you feel. I'm feeling like that too at the moment. I believe it has to get better. Thinking of you x

 

[Becktoria]

Thanks for your kind words ladies, it's been a tough few weeks. So glad I found this site to talk to other people xx

 

[Stella_Marie]

Hi Becktoria
I want to say that I completely feel your pain. I hope your future will bring you such happiness with a beautiful baby to hold and call your own. That's my wish for myself too. I'll pray about it. x