Paedophilia, in your genes?

[Yammas]

I kno but my point is that back then it was considered 'normal'

 

[Natsku]

Yeah I agree with you, whats normal changes.

 

[sequeena]

No. I think people really do want to do these disgusting things. Though I am very biased on this subject having been on the receiving end.

 

[cherryglitter]

No. I think people really do want to do these disgusting things. Though I am very biased on this subject having been on the receiving end.

very sorry to hear that

 

[Tegans Mama]

I think it does have a lot to do with how society changes, women are at their prime for child bearing in their teens and twenties I think that on itself tells us something about how much we have evolved as a species. It might not be paedophilia to be attracted to a teen but it's illegal and morally frowned upon but also 'natural' and a very recent change in attitude. Ofc there's a massive difference between a preteen and 15 year old and this is where I think the law needs clarifying, a 14 year old I'd capable of consenting to sex with an adult IMO whether that adult is 18 or 35. A child is not

 

[cherryglitter]

it is amazing. i was really young when i started my period, 11 i think, i was in primary school i know that much.
it's amazing that physically i was ready to breed but mentally nowhere near ready!

 

[Tegans Mama]

I started mine at 9!! And way back when we'd have had our first child about a year later...

 

[cherryglitter]

so crazy thinking about it. it does show how much we have evolved.

 

[sequeena]

No. I think people really do want to do these disgusting things. Though I am very biased on this subject having been on the receiving end.

very sorry to hear that

Thanks

 

[deafgal]

Even when it was considered normal to marry a teen, I think those people were sick. Older men don't care if they were really for marriage. I am ok when two young people marrying together back those days as they grow and learn together. But not men who are old enough to be their father unless these girls are about over 23 or so.

 

[Sarahkka]

But older men marrying very young women still happens all over the world. And in most of those cultures, it is considered better to have an older husband because he is better able to provide and care for you and your offspring, being more established and more likely wealthier than a boy your own age.
So not sure we can call it "back then". Maybe for western society, but not for many many cultures around the world.

Also, what about the sexualization of children?
We deplore pedophilia, yet we don't collectively seem to have a problem with things like child beauty pageants (where small girls are prancing around in outfits that look like they came straight out of the brothel) or fashions that give 6-year olds padded bras or dolls that look like they would make a good living in the sex industry.... you get my point.
If it's nurture, more than nature, what are we projecting onto small children that might make them into a sexualized object? Do we have a role in creating victims in this regard?

(This is just food for thought, by the way. Personally, I believe that no matter how you are wired, there is always choice involved.)

 

[Blah11]

I dont think any of that has any relevance on how a paedophile thinks. Theyre attracted to children and part of that is their innocence so dressing them as mini adults i dont think that makes a difference.

 

[Natsku]

I agree with Blah. But I think it does affect adults and teens though, some of these 13/14/15 year old girls (some even younger) I see around town honestly look at least 18 with the way they dress and the makeup and that is bound to confuse some men.

 

[Eve]

I don't think it helps when we dress our young children like that, but I also agree that when it comes to a pedophile, I don't think it matters a whole heck of a lot what the child is wearing

Natsku has a good point about the teens and adults though. Mark's step sister when she was 11-12, she could dress up and look at least 17-18! It scared me!

 

[sequeena]

I don't think it helps when we dress our young children like that, but I also agree that when it comes to a pedophile, I don't think it matter a whole heck of a lot what the child is wearing

Natsku has a good point about the teens and adults though. Mark's step sister when she was 11-12, she could dress up and look at least 17-18! It scared me!

No it doesn't I always dressed myself in baggy things, never wore make up etc. I put on quite a lot of weight too foolishly thinking that would stop the abuse but none of it worked. It only stopped when I left home at 19 and I would still get cornered when I went home right up until last March when he was arrested (found not guilty december 2010... guess waiting 10 years was just too long, no proper evidence etc)

 

[Eve]

I don't think it helps when we dress our young children like that, but I also agree that when it comes to a pedophile, I don't think it matters a whole heck of a lot what the child is wearing

Natsku has a good point about the teens and adults though. Mark's step sister when she was 11-12, she could dress up and look at least 17-18! It scared me!

No it doesn't I always dressed myself in baggy things, never wore make up etc. I put on quite a lot of weight too foolishly thinking that would stop the abuse but none of it worked. It only stopped when I left home at 19 and I would still get cornered when I went home right up until last March when he was arrested (found not guilty december 2010... guess waiting 10 years was just too long, no proper evidence etc)

Wow hun I can't even begin to imagine what you went through I am so sorry you had to go through that, and that you will always carry it with you Big Big Big

 

[Nibblenic]

I would also say there is a difference between peadophilies and sexual abuse of a family child.

In what way?

Hi sorry, limited computer access.

I am unfortunate enough to know of two adult men who sexually abused their own offspring. Not that I have contact with them now but have in the past.

They never sought out other children, other than their offspring. They as far as i am aware never groomed other young children or looked at pornography of under aged children.
On was 'experimenting with being gay' on his own. Decided that he was gay and not into children
The other abused his own daughter as a way of controlling the mother and as part of his domestic violence games.

Neither inexcusable, both horrifically horrible things especially listening to them talk about it so calmly and coldly. Like almost they didnt do it and it was some sort of right off passage. I wouldnt say either was pedophiles as they were doing it for different reasons than an attraction of sexual urge towards children. Not that i am saying that it doesnt happen that way. but I do think every abuser is different

 

[deafgal]

I agree with Blah. But I think it does affect adults and teens though, some of these 13/14/15 year old girls (some even younger) I see around town honestly look at least 18 with the way they dress and the makeup and that is bound to confuse some men.

heard of slut walk?

 

[deafgal]

But older men marrying very young women still happens all over the world. And in most of those cultures, it is considered better to have an older husband because he is better able to provide and care for you and your offspring, being more established and more likely wealthier than a boy your own age.
So not sure we can call it "back then". Maybe for western society, but not for many many cultures around the world.

Also, what about the sexualization of children?
We deplore pedophilia, yet we don't collectively seem to have a problem with things like child beauty pageants (where small girls are prancing around in outfits that look like they came straight out of the brothel) or fashions that give 6-year olds padded bras or dolls that look like they would make a good living in the sex industry.... you get my point.
If it's nurture, more than nature, what are we projecting onto small children that might make them into a sexualized object? Do we have a role in creating victims in this regard?

(This is just food for thought, by the way. Personally, I believe that no matter how you are wired, there is always choice involved.)

I still think it is wrong. older men are like alpha male anyway, they oppress the younger male to keep them from succeeding in life (they control the wealth) so they can get young girls and get them pregnant young (while rejecting the older women)

 

[Sarahkka]

But older men marrying very young women still happens all over the world. And in most of those cultures, it is considered better to have an older husband because he is better able to provide and care for you and your offspring, being more established and more likely wealthier than a boy your own age.
So not sure we can call it "back then". Maybe for western society, but not for many many cultures around the world.

Also, what about the sexualization of children?
We deplore pedophilia, yet we don't collectively seem to have a problem with things like child beauty pageants (where small girls are prancing around in outfits that look like they came straight out of the brothel) or fashions that give 6-year olds padded bras or dolls that look like they would make a good living in the sex industry.... you get my point.
If it's nurture, more than nature, what are we projecting onto small children that might make them into a sexualized object? Do we have a role in creating victims in this regard?

(This is just food for thought, by the way. Personally, I believe that no matter how you are wired, there is always choice involved.)

I still think it is wrong. older men are like alpha male anyway, they oppress the younger male to keep them from succeeding in life (they control the wealth) so they can get young girls and get them pregnant young (while rejecting the older women)

Oh, I'm not condoning it.
Not at all.
Just saying that it sure isn't something that only exists in the past and that people in those cultures believe that it's a better way - provides more support, etc for the girl. Sometimes cultural stuff makes those situations a lot more complex.