Painful Sex

[Ethereal]

Hi ladies,

I have a bedroom issue. OH and I have only had sex once during this pregnancy and it was last week (or the week before I cant remember, that's how great it was ha!) and it was very painful and not enjoyable at all. We stopped and that was it.

I dont want to try again for fear of it hurting again. It hurt all night and the day after. There was no bleeding though which is good but I dont understand why it was so sore?

I hate sex during pregnancy anyway, I feel gross and unsexy and fragile. Eugh. OH and I like to get quite kinky in the bedroom but in my delicate state, positions and roughness and level of kink just gets so boring during pregnancy I'd rather just not bother.

However! Denying sex to my OH for the whole time seems cruel, and I would be up for doing it as long as it didn't feel like a million tiny knives in my vagina during intercourse.

Long story short, why am I hurting, is it normal, and is there a cure? The poor sod is feeling deprived and if I dont let him have a go again soon I fear he'll run away with a hooker.

 

[Snufflepop]

I have no advice but I feel the same. I hate pregnant sex!! I feel fat and unattractive and not remotely interested. When pg with my dd we hardly dtd for 8 months and this pregnancy is turning out the same. We tried last week ( because dh was feeling deprived and I was fed up of him moaning about how long it had been) and it was not great. V painful for me. I don't think we will be doing it again any time soon. If he is desperate there are other things he/we can do 😉

Besides the way I look at is that we have to go through enough discomfort with pregnancy and labour, the least he can do is go without sex for a bit!

 

[Lauren999]

I really don't enjoy sex while pregnant either. It's uncomfortable and I just don't feel into it. Every few weeks I force myself to do it to keep hubby happy.

 

[littlesteph]

I think it's something to do with how we feel about sex at the moment.
I've haven't really been in the mood for sex, we tried a few nights ago and everything down there was tight and sore.
There are some nights where I do want it though and those night aren't so much of a problem. its still a little tender but after awhile its not too bad.
A guy at hubby's work mentioned to him to try using lube, it's meant to help us not feel so sore after or during.

 

[charlie_lael]

Have you tried a lube? Could be because it's dry down there and tight cus hormones

 

[mrsed]

I hate it too... I want to but it's so uncomfortable that I'm scared to try again. Poor hubby

 

[SweetV]

I'm the total opposite and love sex when pregnant. It can be very awkward and positions are limited but I guess I'm self conscious about my body image and it's nice to know that DH still finds me attractive. I agree that you should try lube (I believe it should be water based?). Everything is swollen and if you aren't enjoying it mentally it could definitely be making it worse physically. Also double check for UTI's, sometimes that can be a symptom before there are others.

 

[Blu10]

Maybe try a lube lots of foreplay and a different position. I wasnt able to have sex with DH due to bleeding for the first 18 weeks but were now enjoying it again x

 

[marigold91]

Is your cervix super low? Mine is, so sex is really not comfortable for me. I had an internal exam a few weeks ago and my doctor said my cervix is just a fingertips length away - so no wonder sex isn't enjoyable right now! It's a really strange feeling all the time, actually - like even when I'm sitting on the toilet to pee, my vagina feels "full" or heavy... like weighed down or something! I don't know if that part is all in my head, though - lol.

 

[bunyhuny]

Sorry you're going through that. No fun at all!

I've been having the same issue. I think we're going to try lube next time. I'm not anti-sex at all and would really like to be feeling better so I could be up for it more often, but pregnancy has been kicking my butt! The most recent time DH and I went at it (a couple days ago), I was really enjoying everything until it came to the actual penetration part and then it just hurt like crazy. I'd even had an orgasm already that was not at all painful, so things should have been pretty lubricated, but it sure didn't feel like they were. Very weird.

DH and I have DTD maybe four times this pregnancy and this was the first time it hurt. I think we'll be trying lube next time and if that doesn't work, actual intercourse is just going to be off the menu for a while. Oh well, plenty of other (non-painful) things to do.

 

[lingz]

my husband n i dont dare to try.. scare will hurt the baby..