PAL - February 2013 rainbow babies

[Mrskg]

Welcome stacy x sorry for your losses but your rainbow will more than meake up for all your heartache xxx

 

[AllMacsNow]

Welcome, Stacey! I'm glad you found us. I'm so sorry for your losses, but we're almost there this time!

 

[NT123]

Welcome Stacey! If u are anything like the rest of us ur just starting to get ur head around the whole idea of it actually happening this time and starting to get bits ready for baby... At 30 weeks ( nearly 31 ) I barely have anything organised but lots of ladies are very organised by now!

 

[staceyful]

Thanks everyone Yeah I'm really unorganised I've been buying things but then just storing them away so have a whole house to redecorate before she's here! Have any of you chosen names yet? we're calling our little girl Halle x

 

[NT123]

We have a few names, Avery Quinn, lilah grace or Sophia grace at the moment but I'm not 100% on any of them as yet! We have the nursery furniture arriving soon and have decorated the nursery so hoping to be getting straight so we can buy the actual essentials fairly soon! I still have not let any clothes in the house as yet as have not felt ready...

 

[Lulu]

Welcome Stacey, sorry for your losses Your rainbow will make up for your pain.

NT I'm so not organised. The room that will be baby's room is still full of my husband's work stuff (he works from home) & my craft things so we haven't even started to decorate. No where near it. Luckily we still have big things from my son, like the pram but nothing else. I have bought a pram suit in white & a striped babygro in neutral colour, felt I needed to buy something for this baby.

But now we know we're having a girl, I want to eBay all our baby boy clothes then buy loads of girl stuff

 

[EchoMyke]

I know I'm a bit late but I just happened to stumble across this site today. You all seem like such a caring group of ladies and honestly, I could use the support and optimism in general. I lost my son a little over a year ago at 39 weeks. This pregnancy has me hopeful but terrified as I will not even be allowed to carry this one to that point. Every day in itself is a milestone and I've been battling my nesting instincts for fear of jinxing things with this Little Critter.

 

[EchoMyke]

Some days are tougher than others but I've noticed that this time around I experience panic attacks, which I've never been subject to before. Just wondering who else has been dealing with similar things.

 

[shocker]

Welcome stacey Halle is a gorgeous name! I had my loss when i was 18 so we were similar ages, losing him made me realise how much I wanted to be a mum aswell, I think its very difficult to cope with the very different circumstances of losing an unplanned pregnancy while your young, especially as I know many people around me felt that I should be "happy you have your life back" and had several people tell me i should feel that way and that it was a "lucky escape", it used to upset me a lot.

Echomyke Im so sorry for your loss theres a group on here for woman who have suffered later losses that you might find a little more useful, im not saying all losses arent incredibly difficult just that i lost rowan at 14+4 and that was so difficult, I cant imagine how hard it was getting to 39 weeks and all the extra anxiety that coming to the end of the third tri must bring for you so it might be helpful to speak to ladies who've been through it. I have panic attacks when I cant feel him moving, ive had to start using inhalers again even though i havnt had an asthma attack for years because i work myself up and find it so hard to breathe, i am militant about counting his kicks twice a day and also have a home doppler but it doesnt alleviate the stress very much at this stage. I think its natural to feel your going to 'jinx' things, but do remember, the fact that they wont let you carry to that point is good as it means that when he/she (do you know what your having?) is nicely cooked they will make sure that you have the best monitoring and take no risks in getting him/her out as safely and quickly as possible
Here is the other thread aswell if you want a look
https://babyandbump.momtastic.com/p...te-loss-stillbirth-neonatal-loss-sids-21.html

Im out of hospital at last and banned from travelling anymore, did all my christmas shopping online while i was in so just hoping now that the post isnt delayed or no one will get anything! cant believe its nearly 33 weeks now, wish i had a fast forward button! never been so anxious to get christmas over and done with in my life!

 

[Blue eyes 81]

Glad to hear you are home and doing well shocker.

 

[EchoMyke]

Thank you for pointing out that other group. I'm very new to this posting thing. I thought i was doing well in learning to navigate Facebook lol. I was particularly interested with this group of ladies because we're due in February, it's niceto have people going through what you're going through physically as well as mentally. Perhaps i should clarify a little bit, this is my fourth pregnancy. The other two before stillbirth were list early on. I will say this much, loss is loss. It's always devastating. Initially i was just hoping that everything about this pregnancy would be different, and thankfully, much of it has been. If it weren't for my history i wouldn't need to see the high risk doctors that I've been visiting, things have been going that smoothly in answer to your question it's a boy, and he's been playing catch up and growing rapidly. I carry small, but he went from 10th percentile to 17th and now he's at 39th. It's not completely set in stone, but i want to name him Riot James. James is in both mine and my boyfriend's family and i just like Riot because it's different and fits his very active personality! ;-)

 

[AllMacsNow]

Echo, welcome to our little group. I am so sorry for your losses, but glad you've found us. It's a great group of women, and I'm so glad that it exists. You're right, it's definitely nice to have women who basically know right where you're at physically and mentally, all at the same time.

Most of us have moved past the time frame when we had our losses, so some of the anxiety is easing for most of us, and we're starting to really believe that things will be ok this time. I can imagine that isn't really necessarily the case for you, though, and hope that we can be here for you as you go through everything.

I am glad to hear that you're being watched so closely by your docs, so that everything will go smoothly for you, and Riot will make a beautiful healthy addition to your family.

 

[PerpetualMama]

Been up since 3 AM to pee. Way too much going on in my head. I still cannot believe I will have a little one here in just over 2 months. Even though she is awake and bopping around in there, even though I see her on the scans and waddle like a penguin...I cannot wrap my brain around it.
5 more classes for school and I'm finally done with this bulls#!t. I'm not sure what I'll do from here on out school-wise, but I plan on thinking about that after Christmas. This has been the worst semester for school ever, and my heart is not in this program anymore. I'm not sure if it's only because of the pregnancy or if it's the combination of all the crap the professors and department heads or fellow students have put me through (not that the teachers have been mean, just disorganized and way too laid back for my learning style). Finals next week so I have a lot of studying to do...counting down my days to freedom!
I had a scare on Friday, woke up to bloody discharge reminiscent of what I saw with the start of labor with my last 3. It also brought back all the horror of my miscarriage so I was a bit of a weepy wreck. Doc fit me in right away (my appt wasn't til 4 PM but I got in at 9:30 AM) and found me to be closed up tight with no dialation. She sent me in for my 3rd tri scan and my placenta is plenty out of the way now! Sonographer confirmed girl, and she's measuring pretty much right on spot (minus a couple days) and weighing in approx 3 lbs 6 oz . Sonographer also checked cervical length but he said nothing to me. I am obviously NOT in labor, and I have to assume everything was fine because my OB never called (even though she said she would either way). The conclusion is that my bleeding was cervical, and most likely due to being seriously sensitive since I had a LEEP procedure done 5 years ago to remove pre-cancerous cells. I worked 4 days in a row after having about a month off of work, and I pushed myself so hard...I way overdid it, so now I know what happens :/.
Took DH in for his vasectomy yesterday. He was so nervous, and I didn't feel too terrible for him at the time since it's his choice (and nothing compared t the horrors I've been through down there)...but they had a few minor complications during the procedure so now his poor sack is all bruised and he hasn't slept for the pain (He IS actually asleep right now, but was wide awake when I got up at 3 AM. I'm typing lights out in the kitchen). Guess I gotta baby him a little today. I truly am grateful not to have had to do it myself, and I was completely at peace with Anneliese being our last. I am so tired, and way too old to do this all again. One day I will enjoy grandbabies!!

 

[EchoMyke]

Yesterday i was fortunate enough to run into a girlfriend of mine that i hadn't seen in awhile. I've been feeling kind of down and lonely lately and not at all prepared for this little guy. She gave me the sweetest gift, a picture frame where it keeps one picture in the center and has little spots along the edges to put a new photo for each month. Haven't received much for this one because i still had so many things left over from expecting the last. I don't plan on having a baby shower until he's about 6 weeks old and have thought I'd just make due with what i have. However, that little gesture, something new just for this baby. Not something saved from the child that should have been, really made me feel warm and fuzzy about things. And made that feeling of hope bubble up a bit more. I'm scared to be excited but every time i feel him kick, squirm or roll it brings a sense of reassurance. Even if he is keeping me up at night or beating up my bladder lol.

 

[EchoMyke]

Yesterday i was fortunate enough to run into a girlfriend of mine that i hadn't seen in awhile. I've been feeling kind of down and lonely lately and not at all prepared for this little guy. She gave me the sweetest gift, a picture frame where it keeps one picture in the center and has little spots along the edges to put a new photo for each month. Haven't received much for this one because i still had so many things left over from expecting the last. I don't plan on having a baby shower until he's about 6 weeks old and have thought I'd just make due with what i have. However, that little gesture, something new just for this baby. Not something saved from the child that should have been, really made me feel warm and fuzzy about things. And made that feeling of hope bubble up a bit more. I'm scared to be excited but every time i feel him kick, squirm or roll it brings a sense of reassurance. Even if he is keeping me up at night or beating up my bladder lol.

 

[Blue eyes 81]

Merry Christmas ladies.

 

[debzie]

Hope all.you lovely ladies had a good Christmas. I did no work for once as I hav worked the last few. Downton the day wirh my patents,bro and SIS in law and all the kids. Can't wait until next year to have my lo crawling about too.

As far as my pregnancy is concerned just now starting to feel tired. Feet abd legs are swollen heartburn us continuous. Wouldn't change it for the world.

 

[shocker]

Hope everyone had a good christmas!! Been in and out of hospital for the last month with hyperemesis getting worse again, turns out i'll be having a january baby as theyre inducing then! Cant believe its getting so close!!

 

[PerpetualMama]

I'm free! School is out!
Hope you all had a good Christmas!
Echo: I was surprised to get 3 big boxes full of little girlie clothes from my dad and step mom Christmas eve. It was like a mini baby shower. Eveything I have for her so far is a hand-me down. It is time for me to start organizing everything now that Christmas and school are over. It DOES feel good to get something just for this little one. I cannot imagine what you have gone through. My loss was early on, and it pains me to think of a loss so close to birth, that is my big fear.
Shocker: are you excited to be induced early?
My doc told me she will not let me go overdue for long. I'm hoping LO comes a little early, but I'm not counting on it given my track record

 

[EchoMyke]

PerpetualMama: I'm so happy that you got those new goodies! it's so nice to see things coming together, like it's own little affirmation that everything will be okay. My sister sent me the bassinet I'd been wanting and a couple other things. Feels sort of surreal to see it in my bedroom all ready for baby. Nice, but surreal. The nesting instinct has been a tough battle in this house but I've been trying to hold off since maternity leave is only another week or two away and I'll have plenty of time at home then. My Mama is coming to stay with me for a bit so there goes my plans for an actual nursery since she'll need that bedroom but i wouldn't have it any other way
Shocker: have they given you an actual date yet? And are you all set up for your little bundle? I know none of us can really wait to be done with pregnancy and be where we get to meet our babies face to face but going early must feel overwhelming.

Hope everybody had a wonderful Christmas! Ours was fantastic!