Panicing about birth #3

[banana07]

Morning ladies,



For some unknown reason this morning I am panicking seriously about the birth of #3 due 14th April.

DS1 was born as normal with an Epidural

DS2 they tried to insert epidural 6 times and failed each time (took nearly 2 hours) and then it was too late and he came out naturally thankfully at that stage it was quick so I didn't have to dwell on it but they punctured my spinal fluid and I had to go back into theathre 3 days later to get a blood patch done where they insert blood into my spine via epidural needle after not being able to sit up or lift my head for 3 days.

So this time there is no way I am chancing an epidural even to I had said with DS2 I didn't want to get one I screamed all the way to the hospital for one. Yes I know it could go perfectly this time but no way I'm risking being re admitted to hospital again and even the consultant in theatre struggled to get the epdiural in the time I had the blood patch done.

with DS2 the epidural was in sight so that obv kept me going and then it all happened so quickly but how will I cope this time from the start knowing that there is no light at the end of the tunnel bar the baby of course. What if I end up with a big long labour yes I know they usually happen quicker each time but what if its 2-3 days of agony.

Oh the fear in me this morning is even giving me serious braxton hicks.

Pethadine is not an option either reacted terribly to it on DS1 was hysterical and shouting at people about having no tickets and no chicken etc... totally out of mind.


And yes I know some ppl have a much worse time. My SIL nearly died last month after a serious bleed after the birth and my sister just went through 3 days of agony which ended in an emergency section after the babys heartrate deadlined. I do feel a little irrational but I can't help but panic for some reason!!

Any advice!!??

 

[Bellaloo12]

Hi hun i dont know why but i was really panicky about my 3rd labour its so weird as i had 2 previously good births. I know it's easier said than done but just try not to panic yourself about it. you know that having an epidural is out of the question and pethadine is out of the question you have been through it with no epidural before you will be Able to do it again. just think positive to yourself. Have ypu looked at hypno birthing they have some really good techniques i used them with my second and had a realy good labour with no painrelief what so ever i laboured on my feet which made the pain a lot more bearable and labour a lot quicker sorry i cant be of much help to you xx

 

[banana07]

Thanks Bellaloo12.

Funny I have been just looking at hypnobirth stuff since I posted here! I'm not normally into natural or what I call Hippie Dippy stuff but reading reviews on an irish pregnancy and baby form and there tons and tons of good stories. Could be worth a try although I suspect hubby will burst laughing at me!!

Thanks again, god knows why it hit me so bad this morning!!

 

[LaughOutLoud]

I'm panicking too. I have looooooong labours! First time I had epidural eventually an they got her out with vantouse- could have ended up as EMCS. Second time baby was in trouble, epidural failed and because baby wasn't doing good I had EMCS. Hypnobirth went out the window for me. This time I'm scared of labouring invade baby gets distressed again an I think I know my body will drag it out longer again so I'm thinking of planned section but family are telling me not to do that. I'm confused an scared too. I think when it's your first you don't really know what to expect but after a history, things can seem a bit more scary. I was told before to go with an open mind an may be that's what I need to do again? Good luck as I don't have much advice for you x

 

[Bellaloo12]

I think the thing is as well is to Not listen to borth stories of any kind as it can panic us a lot more. Deffinatly look into the breathing techniques etc will really help when i first heard of it with my second i thought it was 'hippyish' too lol but it really will help you! What about ta tens machine? They are supposed to be good too x

 

[banana07]

Oh Laughoutloud, that is a tricky one. 3rd time lucky maybe!!?? Unless you went in and if things appeared in the early stages to be going very very slow you could opt for a section so not exactly an emergency one or a planned one?

All of my sisters had sections two of the emergency and one planned cause of breach but I know the two emergency ones said not a hope in hell would they go through 2-3 days of contractions to most likely end up with a section.

If I had one section personally I think I'd go for it again but I have no experience of a section so this is certainly not gospel! How was your recovery after the sec ?

Bellaloo12, Yes we are certainly not the hippy dippy type but at this stage I'm willing to look at anything. Said it to DH on the phone made him promise not to laugh which he didn't but he did say I did so super with DS2 I'll be grand. He does have huge sympath for women going through labour and things we all deserve a gold star and be worshiped after but he really not sure about this hypno thing. He'll obv go with what I want but I think I'll look into and see. As I said I "did so well" wiht Ds2 cause until the last 20mins the epidural was in sight!! Don't know how I'll cope even with inital pains thinking there is no relief!!

I have a tens machine from DS1 (9 years ago if it still even works!!). I nearly threw it out the window at 3am in the morning but in hind sight I now thinks because I had it on too high for what I thought were big contractions (which I later found out to be mild contractions when I got the real big ones!!).

I am feeling slightly better also since when I text DH earlier that i was awful worried this morning about Labour and he text back look Joan Burton (political party leader here in ireland) will just have to cope if they are not re-elected (we have elections this year!! Oh I nearly died laughing!!

 

[Bellaloo12]

Ah bless you. Amd its nice to know you have a supportive partner too that makes so much difference. Just look at the breathing tecniques for the hypno birthing it will be worth a go. Really i have never used. Tens machine before so i would know lol i think its completely normal for you to feel so anxious as you know what expect etc this time round and you know the pain of it you will do great i'm sure..have you thought about a birthing pool labour? x

 

[banana07]

Birthing pool not an option where I live or anywhere near it. They don't do birth plans in my hospital. In my sisters one up the road she had to fill out forms about pain relief and dim lighting and who and when to cut the cord and did she want skin to skin contact straight away etc... but we have nothing at all like that and they are all public hospitals ran by HSE. Didn't really matter for her anyway she was 3 days in screaming agony before ended with a section I don't think the "plan" even crossed her mind!!

Midwife with DS1 was a horrible battleaxe really old school stop your nonsense type. Midwives with DS2 were so so lovely I'd do anything to have them again but unfortunately its just the luck of the draw but from what I've heard all the midwives in my hospital are really lovely.

 

[Bellaloo12]

Ah really. Yeh your right it is luck of the draw hun. Hope everything goes smoothly for you. You will have to update us when you e had him/her x

 

[LaughOutLoud]

My section recovery was better than the vantouse as I found the episiotomy more painful, but I think for us a lot of it is also to do with our minds, it can play a large role in how we cope.

 

[kerrymom]

I'm also expecting baby number three, and I've been feeling anxious also. I'm so sorry about your last labor, and I can see why you are worried!
Maybe it's a good thing that you know another epidural is off the table, and you can focus instead on other ways to relieve your pain. Can you take a natural birthing class? How about hiring a doula to help you? My first labor I had an epidural even though I planned on going without, my second was so fast i barely made it to the hospital but I was in a total panic because it was all happening so fast. This time around I hope I can go natural again, but I'd like to get to the hospital sooner so I can have some time to prepare and feel safe. I'm going to try and study up on relaxation techniques with my husband.
Good luck mama!