onedaybaby
Mum of 1 and TTC no2
- Joined
- Oct 15, 2009
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- 196
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Hi
Thought I'd ask you lot on here as some issues to do with spacing out children will relate to 'natural parenting'. This looks like it will be long so apologies!
Our little one isn't quite here yet of course but the husband and I occasionally discuss what age gap to allow between children (as in when to try again as I know you can't plan exactly for these things but I've got pregnant twice, both within 2-3 months of trying).
We're 24 so no rush to have a second baby in terms of time running out but I'd like to be done by 30 and we want 2 or 3. Part of me feels that it doesn't matter about having another quickly as it would be delightful to have just our son for a few years, but I have been considering around a 18-24 month gap.
There are 2 issues that I hope your insights can help me with:
1. We will be babywearing, cosleeping and breastfeeding (for at least the first year, maybe up to 2 and I don't fancy tandem feeding) - how will these be affected by a small age gap? As in you can't wear 2 children at once and I don't want to have to use a pram for one as not a pram fan.
I know with cosleeping our oldest could move to sleeping between us, while the newborn sleeps by me, but we will need a bigger bed!
Exclusive breastfeeding will render me infertile for at least 6 months after birth? When did your periods return? Did you use contraception? We don't like barrier methods and I don't want to use hormonal methods so would do the fertility monitoring, withdrawal and hope for the best - and if we got pregnant while trying not to then it was meant to be and at least means we don't have to go through the whole ttc thing!
2. My husband is doing a phd, we live off his grant money only as I am a housewife If we leave a 2 year age gap he will have finished his phd, his funding will have stopped and he will either be just starting a new job or other research position, or he will be in between, looking for work, not bringing any money in.
If we plan to start trying at beginning of 2012 when our son is 10 months ish then our next child would hopefully be born later in 2012 when husband still has funding and he can take paternity leave again, and he is hoping to finish early and will just be editing at that stage.
If a 2 year age gap means we could be in a precarious position and at a time when my husband has a lot of other things on his plate, before he settles into a new position and we start trying there would be a 2.5-3 yr age gap. For me this is bigger a gap than I would like.
So maybe sooner rather than later?
What do you think?
P.S: We started ttc this one when we had no money coming in and my husband was still applying for phds so we are sensible to a point but we were happy to take a risk as it just felt the right time!
Thought I'd ask you lot on here as some issues to do with spacing out children will relate to 'natural parenting'. This looks like it will be long so apologies!
Our little one isn't quite here yet of course but the husband and I occasionally discuss what age gap to allow between children (as in when to try again as I know you can't plan exactly for these things but I've got pregnant twice, both within 2-3 months of trying).
We're 24 so no rush to have a second baby in terms of time running out but I'd like to be done by 30 and we want 2 or 3. Part of me feels that it doesn't matter about having another quickly as it would be delightful to have just our son for a few years, but I have been considering around a 18-24 month gap.
There are 2 issues that I hope your insights can help me with:
1. We will be babywearing, cosleeping and breastfeeding (for at least the first year, maybe up to 2 and I don't fancy tandem feeding) - how will these be affected by a small age gap? As in you can't wear 2 children at once and I don't want to have to use a pram for one as not a pram fan.
I know with cosleeping our oldest could move to sleeping between us, while the newborn sleeps by me, but we will need a bigger bed!
Exclusive breastfeeding will render me infertile for at least 6 months after birth? When did your periods return? Did you use contraception? We don't like barrier methods and I don't want to use hormonal methods so would do the fertility monitoring, withdrawal and hope for the best - and if we got pregnant while trying not to then it was meant to be and at least means we don't have to go through the whole ttc thing!
2. My husband is doing a phd, we live off his grant money only as I am a housewife If we leave a 2 year age gap he will have finished his phd, his funding will have stopped and he will either be just starting a new job or other research position, or he will be in between, looking for work, not bringing any money in.
If we plan to start trying at beginning of 2012 when our son is 10 months ish then our next child would hopefully be born later in 2012 when husband still has funding and he can take paternity leave again, and he is hoping to finish early and will just be editing at that stage.
If a 2 year age gap means we could be in a precarious position and at a time when my husband has a lot of other things on his plate, before he settles into a new position and we start trying there would be a 2.5-3 yr age gap. For me this is bigger a gap than I would like.
So maybe sooner rather than later?
What do you think?
P.S: We started ttc this one when we had no money coming in and my husband was still applying for phds so we are sensible to a point but we were happy to take a risk as it just felt the right time!