Please help me decide what to name baby

[squirrel.]

Hi ladies,

I'm here asking for some advice about what to call our baby. A few years ago I fell in love with the name Isla. I consulted my husband (I love talking baby names, even when I'm not pregnant!) and he loved it too. We were set, if evere we were to have a daughter we would call her Isla.

Fast forward a year and our very close friends were pregnant. I was casually asking about names and they said if it was a girl they loved the name Isla. My face dropped. I seem to remember my reaction being along the lines of "What?!" We all laughed it off then, but inside I was devastated. Well, it did turn out to be a girl and after they found out and announced they would definitely be calling her Isla I spoke to them honestly and asked them about how they would feel if we still used it. They knew how much I loved it and that we'd already decided on it before they announced they were going to use the name and I think they felt bad for me. They said they didn't mind.

Fast forward again and their baby Isla is now 6 months old. When we found out we were having a girl I spoke to them about it once more. They seemed genuinly fine with it; though they joked that they would always say theirs came first.

I kind of put the idea of the name Isla out of my mind, it felt kind of wrong. I didn't know if they were being honest when they said they didn't mind and I also didn't want everyone thinking we'd copied them. We decided on Evie instead, which is a name I like, but don't love. Subconsciously this baby has been Isla from the start and when I call her Evie it feels wrong... Isla is the name that automatically springs to mind.

As I get closer to the due date I know I will always regret not calling her Isla. Our friends have stated they're okay with it and they will probably be moving back to NZ in a few years (which sucks, as they're really good friends), so our daughters probably won't grow up together anyway, but a huge part of me still feels it's wrong. Is it treading on their toes? Will people judge us and think we copied them? I don't know why that would bother me anyway - probably because it's not true and I don't want people thinking it is... ugh! I wish I just didn't care.

What would you do?

Thanks very much for your advice in advance.

 

[IsaacRalph]

Oh tough situation hun! I personally wouldn'tt name my baby the same as a close friends. I always loved the name isobel for a girl and when my sil got pregnant and had a girl they called her isobel and I got really upset. It's silly as I have a ds and now pregnant with another boy so will probably never even need a girl name. Isla is a lovely name though so go with it if it feels right. Similarly our friends who are due on same due date as us are having a girl and they are using our girl name for this pregnancy which was Elsie so it's a good job we are having a boy (Edward) otherwise they'd be war!

 

[Fleur29]

I would use Isla and not worry about it! It sounds like your friends are happy for you to use it (I wouldn't mind if a friend asked to use my dd name - I would be flattered!) and they've said yes. Given what you've said about them moving to the other side of the world too...

Honestly you just sound so set on the name I think you'd be really gutted if you didn't use it.

X

 

[Rickles]

I would use Isla (Personally - I prefer Evie) but you should always name your child what you want... I have 3 friends with sons called Tom - they all agreed it's a great name and why should one of them not have it!

My brother's next door neighbour just called their son Harry because they heard them yelling for Harry all the time and realised they loved it! Big Harry feels super important and my brother says it's hard having such great taste !

It's your child's name - regardless of what everyone else is doing xx

 

[ChristiansMum]

I would use it as long as your friends don't mind. Our DD was Isabel before I even got pregnant with her. My SIL nearly named my niece Isabelle (its a family name on DHs side) but when she said about it I said 'that's what we will call our next baby if it's a girl' (my niece is older than my DD) and me and my SIL get on she chose another name instead. I don't have any regret calling our daughter Isabel even though it's a common name now. I would just go with your gut x

 

[alex_22]

My friend called her little girl freya 3 years ago I always told her I absolutely loved the name and I'm now naming my little girl freya, we went all the way from nursery to leaving school together but something as important as naming my child can't be determined by me knowing someone with a child with the same name, I would have gone through life regretting not calling her freya, I think you should name her isla x

 

[baileybubs]

I would go with Isla. For me I would never name my baby after someone else that wasn't for a reason but if my friend had a baby and chose the same name as me I think that's different. If it's likely they won't be a major part of each other's lives then I don't see the harm at all.
If you feel like Isla is your baby's name then that's what you should call her.

The only other option is find another name coz you obviously don't think Evie is right for her x

 

[jenmcn1]

Well first of all....beautiful name!!! My DD's name is Isla
And truthfully...I would still stick with that name!!! Why change it on the account of someone else. It just means you all have great taste in names it sounds as if your friends are genuine, and they know how much you love the name!! Go for it!!!

 

[Hoping4peanut]

You will be calling your child her name for the rest of your life! The impt thing is that YOU and hubby love the name. It doesn't matter what your friends name their child. Friends come and go in different seasons in your life. Your little girl will be with you forever! I vote Isla because it is what you want but I also think it is a gorgeous name!

 

[Literati_Love]

You ALREADY were going to name your baby Isla and cannot help that your friends took the name before you! It is most important that your baby has the right name for her, regardless of what other people have named their children. ESPECIALLY because your friends have said that they don't mind, you should absolutely name your baby Isla since you like it best! My DH and I picked out our baby names before we got pregnant and we have already told our friends that if they end up using our name (we haven't told them what it is) we are STILL naming our baby that.

Also, small anecdote, but my MIL said she meant to name my DH something else but friends of theirs took the name first so she didn't name him that after all. Now she regrets it, especially because within a couple years the friends drifted and she has never seen them or the child ever since! Moral of the story is - friends may come and go, but your baby is yours forever so choose the name you love the most.

 

[Mummafrog]

I second that what is important is that it will be your daughter's name for life, even though these are dear friends you may lose touch at some point, who knows but you and everyone in your daughter's life will say her name, it's got to be HER name and you know what that is in your heart
You said in your post you would regret not calling her Isla, if you already know that I don't think you should ignore it X

 

[AP]

Fixed your poll

 

[kealz]

All things considered, I would choose Isla.

 

[Cheska]

I would go with it. I'm sure some peop

 

[Cheska]

I would go with it. I'm sure some people would take it as a compliment. So if they've said they are fine with it take it that they are! It's not like it's a really unusual name either. Would they be in the same school/school year. Just something that I would prob take into consideration so it didn't get too weird for them.

 

[bananabump]

I've voted for Evie as I prefer the name.. but if you really love Isla then I'd go for that. You'll only regret it if not xx

 

[laura109]

Go for the name you love. You will be happier and it really does not matter. You have npt copied so dont need to worry.

We have said we will use Sienna if we have a girl. Even if anyone else uses it im still having it lol xx

 

[JoolsH]

We wanted Isaac for our boys name. A lady started coming to our church with an Isaac. She said she was ok with it - we barely knew her at the time. Fast forward 4 years and we are best friends so very confusing. We just use their middle names too , so Isaac Daniel and Isaac James. Works for us x

 

[squirrel.]

Thank you very much for all your advice ladies; you're making me feel so much better about sticking to my original plan and using Isla. Just thinking it makes me feel a happy jolt, so I'm pretty sure it's the right decision for us! I will speak to my friend one more time about it just to be polite.

They would be in the same year at school, but as we live in Zone 2 London and they live a couple of miles away there is no way they will ever go to the same school. There are schools every few streets here and catchment areas are tiny. They also are planning on going back to NZ, so in all likelihood the girls won't grow up together past a few years. They are really good friends, but I think they're prepared for us to use the name Isla as we had already chosen it and they are aware of that. In a way, they named their daughter Isla knowing we were also going to use it way back then, so I feel they won't be surprised if we still use it.

Thanks so much for fixing my poll Atomic Pink

 

[blossome]

I say go for Isla such a lovely name x