potty training under 12 months

[mommyhav]

hi there! i have a couple of friends that began potty training around 8-9 months and have afully potty trained 11-12 month olds. this is what my mom did with me, but my daycare provider (she starts daycare in sept at 9 months) is not really on board..... my daughter has done a few poops on teh potty and seems unphased by it. she lets me know when she has to poop, and really hates to be dirty. she also wakes up from sleep and naps dry and only poops when she is awake and alert. is it possible to do most of the training at home or does it have to be pretty consistent when she is at day care also? i have not committed to this person, but really like everything else about her and we clicked pretty well.....

please dont use this post as a chance to tell me how wrong you think i am for wanting to potty train early...that is not what i am looking for, and will not give my opinion about 3 year olds in diapers if you dont give me yours lol everyone parents differently, and every child is different.

 

[Lynz16]

My little cousin has recently been potty trained and she's using the potty now and is only 13 months but has taken to it well, she's the same, doesn't really like being wet or dirty. I would think that it would have to be consistent but really your daycare provider should be taking on board what you want to do with your daughter - my cousin goes to nursery full time and they just told her mum to bring plenty changes of clothes with her during the day and after about a week or so of a few accidents she was fine.

Maybe you could do it as much as possible at home and then once she gets a bit more settled into it you could just tell your daycare provider that is what you are doing? and maybe you could get some 'pull-up' style pants so that if she does have any accidents that it would just be the same as changing a nappy? until she's a bit more confident with it

 

[BeccaMichelle]

I have no idea as I didn't know you could potty train that early. I had a friend who briefly mentioned they were going to try but last I heard they hadn't started... where's a good place (or book) to get some information on it. I mean, as long as you're not pressuring them and giving them a poop complex then it can't be that bad right?

 

[mommyhav]

i dont know about books yet, but i know that there is a concept called elminiation communication that has to do with not using diapers at all from birth, i had thought that there would be more replies in this section but i posted this in teh baby club section and the post really took off if you would like to follow it. a lot of interesting comments

 

[mum 2 three]

If your lo is tAking to it like that already I'd say go for it Hun my mum always tell me off cause all mine have been late potty training and back in the day at lot of babies were potty trained for 12 months has for your childminder if your doing it at home and she's doing well then she should follow your instructions and be consistent with her when in her care x x

 

[gills8752]

You should do what your instinctive tells you to do. Everyone parents differently - especially us in NP. If it feels right then do it, if you feel she's not happy then stop. X Good luck!

 

[Dopeyjopey]

Elimination communication can be done part time (from what i've read).

Sounds like your lo has the communication bit sorted, it's just learning to get to the potty!

 

[misspeach24]

I'm planning to do EC from as early as poss..less than 6months after birth, it makes sense I would hate the idea of pooing my pants all the time yuk! I'm also looking forward to the bonding that it gives room for.

 

[kiwimama]

Elimination communcation can be practiced part time if you would like. I don't think you could really call what you would be doing as potty training, as ultimately, you will still need to be doing everything to ensure they go to the toilet - ie - pulling their pants and undies down, and putting them on the potty or toilet, wiping their bum etc. Go to https://www.diaperfreebaby.org/ for more info on ec. I agree with misspeach that ec is a really nice way to become very bonded and intune with your baby.

 

[MedMom]

I've been trying a bit of EC since my daughter was 4 days old. I just realised that she would start fussing and kicking her legs BEFORE she went poo or pee, so I cradled her against my belly in a sort of supported squat over the toilet, and she would go almost right away. I think it's a really comfortable position for them to go in.

Anyway, she's 5 weeks old now, and she very rarely poos in her (cloth) diapers. She starts to grunt when she needs to go, I take her diapers off, hold her over the toilet, and she goes right away. It's awesome!

I really don't feel like I'm pressuring her, either. She's started to smile when I hold her over the potty--she seems to enjoy going that way! The only time she cries is when we're driving or out somewhere where I can't potty her, and she has to go in her diaper. She doesn't seem to like sitting in a poopy diaper.

Don't think of it as potty 'training' though. It's more like YOU learning to anticipate when they need to go and then giving them a comfortable opportunity, rather than making them go on command or something. (Although some people also use a cueing sound, like making a sssssss noise, to encourage their babies to pee).

Anyway, it's working out quite well for us!

 

[blessedmomma]

as a psychologist its important to let you know that there are implications that can come from potty training too early or too late. the ideal age that a child can actually understand AND control their bowels is 3. there is a lot of research on the internet and in psychology journals to back this up. the problems that arise from potty training too early are anal retentiveness and encopresis to name a couple. potty training too late brings anal expulsiveness usually. these problems usually dont manifest until later on after the child has already been potty trained, but cause serious problems for the child and the parent.

im not trying to say you shouldnt, i believe every parent should do what they think is best for their own children. mine have all been potty trained at different ages as well, when we recognized signs that they were ready. just thought you were looking for as much info as possible before you went down a road just because you heard someone else did. i know when im thinking of trying something with my children i want all the info i can get. if you google these terms, there are really good descriptions on the internet.

 

[Dopeyjopey]

as a psychologist its important to let you know that there are implications that can come from potty training too early or too late. the ideal age that a child can actually understand AND control their bowels is 3. there is a lot of research on the internet and in psychology journals to back this up. the problems that arise from potty training too early are anal retentiveness and encopresis to name a couple. potty training too late brings anal expulsiveness usually. these problems usually dont manifest until later on after the child has already been potty trained, but cause serious problems for the child and the parent.

im not trying to say you shouldnt, i believe every parent should do what they think is best for their own children. mine have all been potty trained at different ages as well, when we recognized signs that they were ready. just thought you were looking for as much info as possible before you went down a road just because you heard someone else did. i know when im thinking of trying something with my children i want all the info i can get. if you google these terms, there are really good descriptions on the internet.

Just out of interest, are those studies based on freud's theories?

 

[blessedmomma]

there are several studies that can be found on the internet by different people concerning this. i didnt really study freud in college to accurately say what he says.

like i said too, i wouldnt tell someone whats best with their children, so not trying to be attacked. i just know from having four that i researched this and would want to know all the facts and not just what someone says is best or worked and didnt work with their child.

there is a lot of research on the internet and in psychology journals that can be found on this subject that are up to date and accurate.

i believe every child is different, have their own special personality and needs. and im sure not everyone would agree with everything i do with my children, there is always someone who thinks they know better.

would never try to offend anyone and honestly i just pray about my children and the decisions i make with them and let the Lord lead me and my family. im certain not all people agree with this way, but i wouldnt tell them their way is wrong either at all. even being a psychologist, i trust the Lord over any research that has been done.

 

[blessedmomma]

the only reason i even looked in on this thread is because i have found out a family member of mine has encopresis, i think thats the way its spelled, and had just done some research on it for them. found out that one reason it happens is from potty training too early. wasnt trying to offend anyone or anything, it was just something that i had been reading lately

 

[ThatGirl]

personally i wouldnt be toilet training so young little one will sit on potty to get used to it but wont be potty raining till around 18 months-2 years, they need to master talking, walking etc first thats just my views

 

[Dopeyjopey]

I wasn't attacking anyone - simply wanted to know as I'm interested in psychology and had only heard the term anal retentiveness in his studies

 

[blessedmomma]

honey im sorry, didnt mean to make you feel like you were. to me psychology is fascinating, i would never base my whole life on the theories though. it really is the wisdom of men, and we all make mistakes. even people who are well read and think they have all the answers, lol!

 

[MedMom]

Hey! yup, I'm well aware that there are some psychologists who think that early potty training is a bad idea. I have a graduate degree in psychology, and my dad's girlfriend is a Freudian analyst and thinks I'm nuts to be doing this!

I learned about infant potty training in China, though, where pretty much ALL infants grow up this way. In fact, I've read that about 50% of all babies in the world are potty trained to some extent. Granted most of those babies are in developing countries. My husband's whole family, who are Chinese, were all potty trained as babies. Anyway, with that as background, none of them have any serious psychological hang-ups surrounding poop or anal retentiveness that I know of And I certainly don't think half of the world's population is suffering from those problems, either!

So that's the other side of the coin. But certainly, we all do what we think is best for our kids!

 

[blessedmomma]

absolutely medmom! of course there is probably not a lot of research in developing countries to support one way or the other, so we could all say what we think, but we could all be wrong. and there is probably a lot of people in the world who would be embarrassed to talk about things like this, such as "poop" problems, even to their families. no matter if the problem actually originated from potty training or somewhere else. also, as psychologists, we know that it would be silly to say that every child exposed to a certain stimulus, or situation, would have the same implications later in life. there are many twin studies where twins were raised with the same environmental factors that dont turn out the exact same way later in life. so even if half the world was raised a certain way, not all persons would experience the same results of that upbringing.

and of course, this doesnt express my views on potty training. i think its a parents right to decide whats best for their child. no dr, psychologist, friend, expert, or anyone else for that matter can say whats best for each child. they can only look in a book and make an assumption. or look at their child and say what worked for them. not even all the same things work for each of my 4 children, i have to adjust my parenting to each of them, lol! we all know our children best and very personally to make the best decisions we can for them.

i do want to say that you all sound like wonderful mommies and i think your children will grow up in very supportive homes! its great to see that no one is aggressively pursuing anything with their child and being very kind and loving to their childs needs. good job mommies!

 

[misspeach24]

I've been trying a bit of EC since my daughter was 4 days old. I just realised that she would start fussing and kicking her legs BEFORE she went poo or pee, so I cradled her against my belly in a sort of supported squat over the toilet, and she would go almost right away. I think it's a really comfortable position for them to go in.

Anyway, she's 5 weeks old now, and she very rarely poos in her (cloth) diapers. She starts to grunt when she needs to go, I take her diapers off, hold her over the toilet, and she goes right away. It's awesome!

I really don't feel like I'm pressuring her, either. She's started to smile when I hold her over the potty--she seems to enjoy going that way! The only time she cries is when we're driving or out somewhere where I can't potty her, and she has to go in her diaper. She doesn't seem to like sitting in a poopy diaper.

Don't think of it as potty 'training' though. It's more like YOU learning to anticipate when they need to go and then giving them a comfortable opportunity, rather than making them go on command or something. (Although some people also use a cueing sound, like making a sssssss noise, to encourage their babies to pee).

Anyway, it's working out quite well for us!

Sounds Great, Well done!! I'm hoping to use your tips to do the same