Ranting ... Single parent, but who's perfect??

Discussion in 'Baby Club' started by Imi, Sep 4, 2006.

  1. Imi

    Imi .

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    Is there some rule stated somewhere that if your a single mother you have to be scrutenized more than you average family??? Cause if there is i wanna read the rule book!!

    My daughter has been in hospital twice in a week due to what could be a lactoise intollerance and ezema ... the poor might also has a viral infection, so much so she's hardly slept and you can proberbly understand that i got quite upset too .... seeing your child like that when they can't do anything and neither can you kinda upsets you and people should understand that right?? WRONG!!!

    I have had the health visitor on the phone TWICE ... apparently she has been told im over anxious, freatfull and "un-able" to cope!! im fuming (must admit sitting here crying more than anything because that allergation is totally untrue, upsetting and unfounded) Ever since i've had maddie i haven't found it hard and i've carried on with my normal life LOVING everyday and every moment spent with my daughter ... not sat at home blubbing on the sofa cause i can't deal with her ... she's a perfectly well behaved child ... She never cries!!!!

    This has come from a bitchy nurse on the childrens ward who should in reality be a decendant of adolf flaming hitler ... he was proberbly more curtious in his day than she is now ... and a damned site more polite, if your gonna send people to the slaugher at least have the decency to let them know first...

    Im starting to realise that single parents get scrutenized more than you arverage 2.4 "perfect Family" ... unfortunatly most of us didn't pick to be on our own with our children ... but extreamly gald we have them anyway, Do people out there really think that we wouldn't love to be with the fathers of our children and be "one big happy family"? do they honestly think this is the way we have chosen to bring up our children on our own?? NO WE DON'T BUT WE DO ANYWAY BECAUSE WE LOVE THEM!! and once upon a time we loved the person who concived that child with us.

    I got rejected and left with maddie but i don't regret having her at all ... but what i do regret is not standing up for myself sooner.

    Yes i maybe a single mother, yes i may get a little upset sometimes but she is my daughter and i worry ... if i didn't social services couldn't get to my door quick enough!!

    All this is making me wonder weather i am a good mother and if i am doing the right thing by my little girl ...

    Or is me handing her over to the "perfect" 2.4 family something i should have thought about??

    Well i have news for those so called "professionals" those 2.4 "perfect" familys arn't all they are cracked up to be either ...

    So try leaving those of us who can cope alone, and go and look for those children your negecting that are actually in trouble and need your help.

    Sorry for ranting ...

    Imi... :cry:
     
  2. Tootsie

    Tootsie Well-Known Member

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    Rant away hunnie. I totally agree with you when i split from my ex with the kiddies, i was constantly under more scrutinising from the health visitors. My youngest was under a year old then and where i had to keep moving too it was strained but i coped.

    Just tell em to stick their opinions as long as theres love in a family who needs a secon parent.
     
  3. Sarah_N_Braydon

    Sarah_N_Braydon Well-Known Member

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    hunni anyone who has spoken to u knows u love maddie more than anything
    no way should u be made to feel this way no one should but sadley there is a thing about singles mum that is not rite both our babies sperm donnors did a runner and were made to feel worse how is that rite?
     
  4. Imi

    Imi .

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    Well apparently it's others that have the right to judge .... how this is fair is beyond me ....

    I remeber the saying ... people who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones ...

    To right!!!!
     
  5. Jo

    Jo I'm an old bag!

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    Don't you ever let it cross your mind again that you should have given Maddie to a 'perfect 2.4' if you do i'll slap ya!!!

    You are a good mum and don't let anyone tell you any differant, if you hadn't taken her to Hospital then it could well have been written on notes that your were negletful, you can't win hunny

    Mothers in general whether single or with a partner come in for a lot of shit and when we show concern for our children are called over anxiuos.

    Well i'll tell you something now i would rather be called over anxious than negletful.

    These so called health professinal need to get a grip with what is important.

    Take the case of that poor mum who set fire to her house and baby died she had severe PND where were the HV etc... then? nowhere to be found, she missed appointments and stuff but nobody gave a damn and look how that ended?

    Ignore everyone IMI you know you are doing the best for your daughter as we only can, there is no rule book, and to hell with everyone else


    Sorry rant over

    (((((((hugs IMI))))))))
     
  6. miss maternal

    miss maternal Well-Known Member

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    I admire you Imi for being a single mum and I know it is best for your baby to have one strong loving parent than two that dont get on or that get scared and run. I have the chance of going back to my ex after he dumped me @ 5 months pregnant and moved a girl into his house. I want to give it a chance for my baby as he is showing an interest in her now and i still love him. He said he would support me and the baby when he dumped me but I am worried that he wont want her when she arrives. I am not very independant so I think it must be hard being a single mum so you inspire me hunnie. Well done. x
     
  7. ablaze

    ablaze lucky mum of one of each!

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    miss m, imi aint a single mum anymore :D she has gav now :hugs:
     
  8. Wobbles

    Wobbles WoBbLeWoBbLe
    Administrator

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    lol I wondered for a moment - this thread was just before this time last year! Blimey shows you how thing scan change doesn't it.

    :D
     
  9. Suz

    Suz ~ I are a Nerd ~

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    Loads of things have changed in a year..... :hugs: Look at Wobbles! :dance:
     
  10. Imi

    Imi .

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    Gosh what a reminder!!

    We been together a year now :)

    xxx
     
  11. miss maternal

    miss maternal Well-Known Member

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    lol:blush: sorry Imi . didnt read the year of your post.:rofl: Glad you have found a decent bloke now. x
     

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