recently single

[Embo]

Hey girls, not been on here for so long!

I became a single mum on the 23rd September, and I'm currently living with my parents, (which I hate!) so just looking for advice on everything really, my ex see's her on a saturday afternoon for a couple of hours, but is quite controlling with when he see's her and is not playing by the rules, asked him to put her down for a nap last weekend and he didn't instead he took her round his mums!! which I was annoyed at because its his time to spend with her. Also his house isn't very safe, no stair gates, no bannisters on the stairs, and its dirty if i'm honest how do I approach this subject?, he does pay maintenance but shall I just stick with a mutual agreement of trusting he's going to pay it or take him through csa as he's always been very secretive on what he earns even though we were engaged for 3 yrs! So I don't know if what he's giving is enough.

Also how do I go about getting my own place I'm desperate to get out of my parents they are helpful but I also find them very interfering and we argue a lot and I know I'd be happier in my own space rather than having them watch over me all the time.

any advice will be grateful

 

[Laura2919]

Hi.. Welcome.. Im not that far in front of you. I seperated from FOB on 12th September.

I would definitely explain to him and his mum that they need to get some stair gates and keep it safe for LO but for now in regards to maintenance I would say continue if he then decides to mess about take him to CSA..

As for getting your own place I would suggest going to the council and seeing if they can help, they should do a rent deposit scheme if you want to private rent or you can join their list for housing...
I moved into this place when I was single last year, FOB and I tried again and we officially split in September so I already had the flat but I was single so its not easy but keep going and keep on top of it and you will get somewhere..

Hope things work out for you..

 

[emlubu]

Hi I became single in April due to his adultry... Men try n make it hard for u even if they was in the wrong.. I would take him csa my ex said yeh i will pay u this n that and sometimes he did but most time
Left with nothing... And csa will find out his income for u believe me and if he is like
My ex n non complient with em they take it
Out the wages before he even touches it.

I had to move in With my mum so I know what yours going thro I have moved out to my own place only 2 days ago n loving
My space chin up things will happen right for u eventallt over time!!! It's early days yet xxxx
If u need to chat about anything I'm a good listener n advisor x

 

[jaytee146]

I would def. take pictures of his living conditions and everything you find wrong with his living arrangement... I wouldn't let him know as if he's anything like my FOB he'd make a sene... given all i've been through and am currently going through with my lo's fob i wouldn't trust a verbal agreement if it were delivered by a pony dipped in gold and best of luck!