'Reins' for a toddler 'cruel' ????!!!

[babyjan]

I never thought I would get them but I did, rarely use them at the moment but I fail to see how keeping your child safe is 'cruel'.

Would they prefer that the child somehow managed to escaped from you and got hit by a car?

Do whatever you feel is best for you and your child x

 

[pinkpolkadot]

Not cruel at all, in fact essential for us! My LO is a darter we have a backpack reign and hold her hand as she is off like a shot otherwise. I have heard people saying they would rather just teach road safety etc... but it's not always that simple when you have a crazy toddler with little sense of danger regardless of how hard you try to teach them not to run off!

 

[Natsku]

Not cruel at all! They help keep your toddler safe, how can that be cruel?! That said, they are really uncommon here so I very rarely used them but then again Maria is good at holding my hand to cross roads and stopping when I tell her to so I don't really need them.

 

[kazzzzy]

not cruel at all, the opposite in fact to keep your child safe, we've used them sometimes as LO loves walking now but she's gone so strong physically & willed that I would be afraid she'd get loose from my hand, they were very handy on holiday as the place we stayed in was very busy & I would be afraid of my life she'd get loose & lost in the crowd.

 

[kmumtobe]

I used them at your lo's age as a starter for walking out and about, i wanted to give him the oppurtunity to be out the buggy but he did not have an appreciation for holding hands and would just bolt, they cant understand safety at that age. He would wear them and id double loop the rein around my hand and encourage him to hold hands.. you could barely see them as he learnt to walk next to me, they became a back up.. he doesnt need them at all now hes fantastic at holding hands and we love going out walking together. He even gets to the edge of the road and says 'cars? safe? go!' before crossing! Definately needed in that initial stage to get to this point!

 

[rosie272]

I used reins for a month or so until Charlie got used to walking beside me holding my hand - I don't think they're cruel in the slightest just a safety measure for when you're out and about in busy roads/streets. I think we used them when he was around 19/20 months old, and didn't really care what anyone else thought!

 

[babycrazy1706]

Not cruel in the SLIGHTEST! Its so weird how ppl have these silly views.

 

[lau86]

IMO it's ridiculous to say toddler reins are cruel

 

[geordiemoo]

Not cruel at all, I would rather my daughter was on reins and not in the road than injured or worse. DD is very good at holding hands however we do use the reins if we go somewhere busy or where we are near a lot of busy roads. And her Nana uses them as she wouldn't be able to run after DD like we can. Everyone's entitled to their opinion but I personally think it's a bit naive to say they are cruel.

 

[onetwothreebp]

I've never had to use them but I wouldn't be opposed to them. Asher is getting a lot more stubborn these days and doesn't listen so quickly to me. I won't be afraid to resort to them once the baby comes, I can't go chasing after him so easily with a carseat on my arm.

 

[Abigailly]

I don't think they're 'cruel' as such. I don't agree with them though. I find them too dog like. In farming, a dog lead is because the dog is untrained, not trusted and a liability. Those dogs never last on the farm long. Which is probably why I dislike reigns so much.

However, I wouldn't be opposed to them if I had a child who was any of those. If she was not to be trusted on a road, or to not run off then I may consider them. I'd rather cut that behavior out before we get to that point though. Which has always worked with Niamh and the childminded kids. I may eat my words in the future though.

 

[_dreamer_]

I have never had a problem with them but my oh always used to say "I'll never put my children on a leash" and was so strong against it that it was wrong....I used to say wait until she's toddling about....well we use them with our 18 month old Lo and he now appreciates the safety factor....I especially think by busy roads and in crowded places they are an extra confidence in case your lo does decide to dart off after that dog/cat/ball/flower or just let go of your hand. I do think each to your own though. Do what works for you and your lo and try your hardest to ignore any unhelpful comments, especially from strangers x

 

[Lynzeigh]

I see no problem with them at all. I will use them for my son too if he gets to a stage where he can run fast and refuses to walk safely beside me. I have a knee that dislocates if I run so I have not much choice anyway.

The only time I saw reins used negatively was when I was at a lovely safe soft play group, a father had his 1 year old on reins constantly! Even while the baby was sitting in the ball pool etc which I found a bit OTT. Poor child had no freedom to move properly as he was holding her up with the reins whenever she tried to bend down, sit down or crawl about.

It's people like that, that give reins a bad name I think!

 

[lozzy21]

I don't think they're 'cruel' as such. I don't agree with them though. I find them too dog like. In farming, a dog lead is because the dog is untrained, not trusted and a liability. Those dogs never last on the farm long. Which is probably why I dislike reigns so much.

However, I wouldn't be opposed to them if I had a child who was any of those. If she was not to be trusted on a road, or to not run off then I may consider them. I'd rather cut that behavior out before we get to that point though. Which has always worked with Niamh and the childminded kids. I may eat my words in the future though.

Cut what behaviour out before you get to what point? Children have no impulse control and no real danger awareness untill long after they are capable of walking.

 

[CMarie]

DH & I use them for our LO, and we absolutely love them. He's been getting too fussy to stay in his stroller or Ergo so we let him walk around a mall, park, etc as long as he has them on and he does super well with them. We've gotten a few negative looks, but honestly, we'd rather put up with those than a dead or injured toddler. Since we started using them a couple of months ago we've actually noticed that it's helped him in terms of knowing where his boundaries are. We'll let him walk around without them on and he's learning not to walk away too far

 

[alisha_t]

I use a backpack style one for my DD who just turned 2 last month. I couldn't keep up with her otherwise as I am 7 months pregnant lol. Like others have said, it is all about safety and I would rather her be able to walk safely than be strapped in the stroller all the time.

 

[supertabby]

We have used them with our lo, we had the backpack style. We don't use them so much now she's nearly 2.5yrs as she's reliable at holding hands near roads and she understands the stop and wait principle when crossing (I wouldn't say she could judge the safe moment to cross just yet but she waits to be told it's ok).

I get frustrated with the "I'd rather teach road safety" argument. The majority of parents who use reins are teaching road safety at the same time - it'd be foolish not to do so surely?! We saw the reins as a back up measure should she suddenly cut free and dart towards the road, but we insisted she held our hands by the road regardless, the reins weren't an alternative, they were a safety net while she was learning. Just like an instructor's car having a second set of brakes. I think most parents in favour of reins see it that way.

 

[supertabby]

I don't think they're 'cruel' as such. I don't agree with them though. I find them too dog like. In farming, a dog lead is because the dog is untrained, not trusted and a liability. Those dogs never last on the farm long. Which is probably why I dislike reigns so much.

However, I wouldn't be opposed to them if I had a child who was any of those. If she was not to be trusted on a road, or to not run off then I may consider them. I'd rather cut that behavior out before we get to that point though. Which has always worked with Niamh and the childminded kids. I may eat my words in the future though.

How do you "cut that behaviour out" before they get the opportunity to run into a road? Children aren't born with road safety (or crowd safety) awareness, they must learn it like anything else and they learn to walk first.

Also, where are you getting dogs that are born trained?

 

[mayb_baby]

I have them and use them when I see fit, like recently I was in Blackpool and in places such as the Pleasure Beach I used them as I was petrified he would dart off. I think it depends on the child and where you are if they are needed but to call them cruel is just stupid.

 

[Mrs_Random]

My son holds hands but I have them as back up.

He's only 2 & easily gets distracted, so he will be walking nice next to the pram then see something & set off.
I can't chase him when I have his brother in a pram too so the reins just stop him going too far.

I'm confident he can wait to cross a road but again if he got distracted or excited by something he forgets what he's doing & will just go - again it's good to have them as a back up.

When toddlers are young they might understand but have short attention span & are easily distracted from what they are doing so it can be helpful to have the reins so they can't get in to danger. (Kids move quick!)