Reluctant Partner??

[4magpies]

Who is WTT because your partner is reluctant?

How frustrating is it!

Sometimes its just like he doesnt understand how much I feel the need!!

Also does my head in when he decides on a date and then changes it!!

GRrrrrrrrrrrrr!!

xxx

 

[Essie]

That's me. Hubby keeps changing his mind and won't commit to a definite date. It's frustrating, but i know it's better to wait until both of us are ready and want it. Doesn't make me any less broody though!

 

[4magpies]

Glad im not the only one.

Its especially not fair when EVERYONE i know is pregnant or just had a baby!

In august we will own our own house, both have good jobs, been together for 3 years and have a grown up doggy (hes a pup at the mo!!).

He just keeps making excuses.

And I do worry he is never going to be ready even though he wants children. There is never gonna be a time when everything is 100% right.

Dont get me wrong I want to get married but marrige isnt one of our priorities... it would be nice dont get me wrong! But i think buying a house together is a bigger commitment!

xxx

 

[Essie]

Everyone i know has babies too! My hubby says he wants to wait, but can't properly explain why. First he said finances, but when i showed him that they weren't as bad as he thought he said he still wanted to wait.

It's the "not ready" excuse, but he cant seem to explain why he's not ready. I think it's just a case of waiting, and hopefully one day he'll realise he is ready and say it's okay to TTC. We've tentatively said in the summer, but I'm not positive it'll be then.

 

[Jenba]

I don't think men can actually understand the biological yearning to have a baby ... its like PMT .. you know what it is, you know why you acting so mad but you just can't stop it!

 

[helent1983]

My OH would never have said "Oh yes lets try for a baby" it just wouldn't have happened!! He was always telling me that we can't aford it or he didn't know if he wanted kids! It turned out I ended up pregnant through NTNP and now OH will admit he wishes we had tried sooner and is looking forward to us having a second!

Oh and if you wait till you can afford a baby you will never have one!

xx

 

[sleepinbeauty]

I qualify for this one. There are a few reasons we're waiting but "OH being a butt" is the biggest.

 

[Jenba]

Oh and if you wait till you can afford a baby you will never have one!

xx

I fully agree!!

 

[mossip]

Can i join in. My OH was all up for it last year so we went to the fs then he goes and backs out ffs. I've got loads ov problems and im sick ov tellin him its not gonna happen over nite but he doesn't listen lol xxx

 

[Lilly12]

yeah im kinda in the same boat.
First he said he wasn't sure he even wanted kids
Then he said he wants to wait cause he said it'd be too expensive
Then he said he wasn't worried about the finances, he just wasnt mentally ready
Then we thought I was pregnant and he got kind of excited but nervous
Then he said he was mentally ready but he just wanted to prepare himself for it mentally
Then he said we can start dtd without condoms but with the withdrawal method (im not on any bc)
Then we dtd a few times and he said "why dont you write "nc" on the calender for every time we have sex so when you get pregnant we know when we conceived"..
Then he said after sex "maybe youre pregnant now" ..without freaking out or anything..before dtd he said "lets do some baby making"..
Im like ?????? Im so confused....what DOES he want?!?

I think at first I was so wanting to be pregnant that it came across as pushy towards my husband, whenever he feels pushed he gets nervous and anxious and he goes the opposite direction (with anything).

Now I stopped nagging so much and stopped talking about it so much, just lil comments about baby stuff, and all of a sudden we're dtd without condoms.

Wonder what's next

 

[Rei]

know how you feel, my boyfriend wants me to wait till I'm thirty to have a child (i'm twenty now) the idea is completely stupid he just doesn't want to have kids and he thinks this is his way of compromising.

 

[wanting2010]

I can totally relate. A year ago when I first started getting baby fever, hubby gave me a list of guidelines and said that after these things were met, then we could start trying to have a baby. I was okay with that as the list had a lot of practical things. Well, everything on that list has now been met: we both have stable jobs, we can "afford" a baby, we have insurance, we own our own home, we have a nice amount in savings, we've been married three years...and he still wants to wait. It is incredibly frustrating, especially when he told me we could start trying in June, and now he's wanting to push it back even further...

 

[4magpies]

Men eh?! We will never truly understand them.

It causes some big fallings out in our house. I know he would be ok if I did get pregnant but he doesnt want me to get pregnant? If that makes sense!

xxx

 

[mossip]

Were the same. Every argument is ova babies. He'd b ok if i cud fall pregnant but we need to go to the fs for help and i might not even b able to carry. xxx

 

[Essie]

We've had some arguements over it too. I think it's such a emotive subject that if we disagree feelings just get too much and we argue.

 

[4magpies]

How come mossip? I have some health problems that might make it hard for me to concieve so its another one of the reasons I dont want to leave it too late.

xxx

 

[mossip]

How come mossip? I have some health problems that might make it hard for me to concieve so its another one of the reasons I dont want to leave it too late.

xxx

I've got a smaller uterus than normal and only 1 tube. My womb is on the left and i have pcos. Not much really lol. I just wanna get the ball rolling xxx

 

[4magpies]

Ahh hun have you had an ectopic or were you just born like that?

I have a tilted womb a cyst on my left ovary and suspected endo (they find out for sure in may when I have my op)

xxx

 

[mossip]

I was born like that. I only have 1 kidney aswell. Didn't find out till i was 23 tho lol. Fx u don't need an op xxx

 

[4magpies]

I do need an op... I have it booked for the 22nd of may... I just hope they dont find anything too nasty.

xxx