~S.T.L<3~*Lots of babies, Adoption and Waiting for Beth's BFP! <3

[AndreaFlorida]

My moms okay finally she called me last night, then Jason and I went out to relax a while an I had a DRINK...lol just one...and only drank half of it. I'm not a big drinker...but just in case didn't wanna mess anything up in there. Woke up with hot flashes an slight temp drop an feeling yucky like AF is gonna get me soon....stupid body. If I have another short cycle I told Jason I'm gonna get on some kind of birth control....just to see if my body can get on the right track since something last month screwed me up to having just 24 day cycle...and I think this one is gonna be the same way...with a 12 day luteal. Just weird...so gonna try to "knock" my body back into a good cycle again.....

 

[AndreaFlorida]

https://www.mothering.com/community/t/1206097/is-23-24-days-too-short-of-a-cycle

Just found that read the 3rd post down LMAO! Maybe I'm not crazy

 

[waiting2012]

11 DPO with a 45-60 min hold (late afternoon/early evening)

Seems We didn't get it this cycle but why do I keep seeing things on these stupid F'ing tests I have...Doesn't seem to matter the brand either..

I also had a moment at bible study where it felt like someone punched me straight up (through the va-ja-ja) to my cervix..OUCH.. I've never felt a pain like that before...NEVER... I don't know why the hell now... UGH... And my hips keep hurting again--still feeling like a damn wishbone... I'm so ready for AF to get here.. Should be wednesday..

 

[armymama2012]

I'm sorry Steph. I really dont know what else to say.

 

[AndreaFlorida]

I duno I'm so sorry I got tonight as well....blah.....might have had a cyst burst sounds kinda how mine felt when it ruptured...if you keep hurting might wanna get a check up wouldn't hurt anything....emmm...well I'm about to go to bed I think AF is coming tomorrow my temp is really really low today blah...usually does that before AF shows......sooooo its over for me this cycle onto next....

 

[waiting2012]

Oh, it doesn't hurt at all now..It only lasted a few seconds at most.. So don't think it was a cyst.. Oh, it doesn't matter now... LOL...

Sorry, you got a bfn Andi... I hope your temp goes back up tomorrow sweetie! FX'ed for it..

Heading to bed too..10:30 was later than I wanted to stay up.. And its been a so-so day..I'm wearing my emotions on my sleeve badly and the dh is just pissing me off so bad..We've argued and argued about getting another car with the IRS refund--my car is running terrible but it gets me to work and home--so I guess I'm just going to stick it out..I want a bug or something small that gets good fuel milage since we have the suburban as a family vehicle and Wes will graduate in May so I'm not as concerned about going a lot of places hauling him around.. Ya know?? I keep getting the old "the suburban is what YOU picked out" crap--I wanted something other than a truck last year which is what HE wanted..He has a blazer *needs a transmission*, a flatbed ford *needs to be inspected and some hoses replaced* and the suburban.. How many f'ing trucks does he need when he goes down the road to the college????? It'll be a year or more before he's ready to have to drive to one of the universitys (45 min away) so WTF??? I get told I picked out my 1800.00 peice of crap that has managed to run for 3 years and got me to work and back but is a 94 and on its last legs.. At the time we couldn't afford to pay a whole lot because I had owed back taxes.. And he doesn't say shit about how I helped him get his license back which was like a grand! OMG..I'm sorry to rant..I'm just tired of the "ME, ME, ME" crap from him... I love him but shit.. And he's bitching about me going with the girls next weekend and being gone ALL "WEEK"--umm.. friday and saturday night is not all WEEK... I don't see them but 2 or 3x a year if that..And they are coming here to my house to pick me up--which is another of his complaints--how we always go to one of my besty's house and they never come here..They live in the metroplex and we live in PO-DUNK Bowie..There ain't shit to do here, I wouldn't want to visit either!

I'm done--well I could go on and on but I can feel my b/p rising just thinking about it.. Tomorrow probably won't be any better, it is a Monday...LOL

 

[bnporter81]

Hi girls

Nicole, adorable bump pics...and I loved the ultrasound pics you posted earlier, too.

Andi, I'm sorry that it seems like AF is on the way. I hope it doesn't and that you get some good news on the girls really soon!

Steph-I know it's depressing feeling like Gail's prediction didn't come true...it didn't for me either. She didn't give me a year of when it would be, though so maybe it will be that month of a different year, lolI hope AF doesn't show for you and you'll have your chance for Gail to be right. Have a good time this weekend and not to stress over anything.

Nothing new for me...I've been taking the Metformin for about 6 weeks. I had a couple of days of spotting a couple of weeks ago and I got excited but it never turned into more. I even tried taking a test the other day with small hopes that maybe the spotting had been implantation bleeding, but it was a BFN. Anyway, I tried telling my doc. how long my cycle had been and I expected her to give me Provera, but instead she just increased my Met. to 2,000mg. a day. I go back on the 18th to see how everything is going. So, if no AF by then I will beg her for the Provera, I guess. I'm just really frustrated. I think at my appt. I'll even ask her about maybe letting me try Clomid in the near future

Have a great week everyone.

 

[waiting2012]

Awe Beth that stinks big time!! I wish you could find another doctor hun.. seems you are getting blown off and to know that your dr is a woman makes it crazier! My dic put me on Provera so I'd have good cycles bleeding wise because if a woman doesn't bleed proper than it builds up and can lead to endometriosis or even uterine cancer.. those were his words too.. I would think shed at least want a blood test done to dbl check... jeesh...

I'm posting my 12 dpo test pics.. they are the equate brand.. FMU and pic was taking before 10 min was up.. I'm not sure what to make of it.. tjinking I got a bad test but my cb test had "sonething" on it too so I bought 3 tests at the DG.. I so want Gail to be right.. and that is odd she didn't give you the year ect with your prediction hun.. hmmmm... might be worth sending her a message and see if she just left something out or what... thats crazy...

 

[waiting2012]

Forgot to mention.. nauseas this am, bbs hurt off and on and so swelled I need a bigger bra.. ugh

 

[AndreaFlorida]

I see a shadowy thing on the Equate...I don't like those I've had horrible evap looking things on them and the disappears after like a few hours which is confusing!...here are mine from this morning....this is after they dried but they had the lines there before I'm sure they are just evaps...we went to Applebee's an I didnt pic of them til we got back oops o well.....will test tomorrow with FMU (Screen tilt needed as I took it outside it was bright!)

 

[waiting2012]

Yeah, Andi..I'm pretty sure my equate is just one NASTY evap..I mean it was there within the allotted time and I usually don't ever see anything on them..Leave it to me to get a bad one..LOL..
I think I see something on your strips hun, but I'm not sure.. I see your temp is didn't go to any which is a good thing... I guess its just wait and see for us both.. I put in some dates in CNTDWN as far when implantation would likely occur and when I based it on my lmp and a cycle that is 36 days--it said I O'ed on 2/25 which is 2 days later than what my OPKs say.. But I don't think that's right--I had started getting pos opks on 1/18 or 1/19 and they stayed pos all the way through to the point I ran out.. SO who knows...
Here is this evening's when I got home.. Needless to say, I can't tell anymore than I did on the others...

 

[AndreaFlorida]

Wow deffo a pink line!

 

[waiting2012]

Ya think? I'm not terribly convinced..LOL... We'll see how tomorrow's goes... I've got a farm to go harvest..

 

[AndreaFlorida]

I'm sitting here horribly depressed....for one...I have enough money in the bank to do IVF.....this SUCKS....the bad news is I really need to pay off the bills we have right now to save more money etc on our paychecks....I'm sooooo sad I want to just cry my eyes out....DH even saw me really upset....gonna go pig out an well watch Teen Mom and cry....I'm so depressed ladies this cycle is the worst so far its almost been 4 years and all I wanna do is cry now...might call tomorrow an see if I can try IUI....or talk about maybe paying 4,000 for IVF until I can pay the other 1000 or get a new loan at the bank for the other money I need to try this just once I cannot stop and DH is gonna have to have my back here....this is it...I'm getting older an so is he....this is it

 

[armymama2012]

I see a pink line too Steph!

Andi, I'm sorry hun. I would say try IUI once or twice and save up and try IVF once. Thats just me because thats how I would want to do it but its up to you. I hope DH has no problem supporting you through this. I know you need this!

 

[AndreaFlorida]

Thanks Nicole I'm in shambles...I keep reading horrible reviews about my own doctor....and it is really scaring me.....wondering if its worth it. I have seen some ladies on these things saying it took 6 IUI's and 3 IVF's and just breaks my freaking heart. With my first husband I got pregnant TWICE in less than 3 months time....I don't understand how it was so easy then but now this doctor tells me I have all these issues.....why now....and do I believe it b/c apparently he lied to some other women about their issues to just get their money etc. then he wouldn't refund the money they promised them....just makes me really iffy now. Wondering if just waiting is whats best....but another side of my heart strings are tugging and just thinking of it breaks my heart and pulls me to just TRY it......but another part says "Andi pay off the bills first...." this is the hardest by far thing I've ever had to deal with and I really don't have anyone to listen to me. My cousin that came and moved to my moms house is really "snotty" about it....like how shes lucky to have one child and I should be counting my blessings....what she doesnt know is I do...and I count them and appreciate them so much I'd like ONE MORE....then be done with it all...but to get this ONE more its a battle. I'm really considering making a doctor appt with my doctor on base again and see if they can give me some depression medication again. I'm not to the point of wanting to hurt myself or anything like that...just crying and laying around the house not wanting to go out or anything....just not myself...we went out the other night for 2 hours...then I said I just wanna go home an started feeling like I wanted to cry but I held it in......This is a disease...its not just infertility...its something that just breaks your heart....something that hinders you from being "completely" happy.....I just can't believe this is "my life" this is supposed to happen to other girls who are dope heads...NOT ME Life is just not fair....I hate being handed lemons but seems I've had that happen most of my life.....just blessed I was adopted at a young age and had a really good childhood etc......okay rant over I'm so sorry....I'm seriously okay just really down right now

https://www.ratemds.com/doctor-ratings/114496/Dr-Barry-Ripps-Pensacola-AL.html

There are a few of the bad reviews you have to read through them all...

 

[armymama2012]

Aww...hun, I hate when logic pulls you one way but your heart yurns to go another. You are making me want to get a car so me and Jerusha can come hang out with you for a few days and cheer you up. The fact is though, I cant because of how far along I will be when I finally do get a car. Maybe next year.

I'm kinda in a tug-of-war situation too. I really like my male OB (especially since I realized that he was the assisting OB for Joshua's C-section birth) but DH is insistant that I switch to a female OB. I hate doing this and scheduling with another OB because who knows if it'll push all my appointments back another 2-3 weeks. I hope since they are in the same health care system that there will be no problem accessing my records but I'm just torn between following my Dh's wishes or staying with the male OB that I like.

 

[bnporter81]

Steph, I think I see a light pink line, tooPraying this will be it for you, hon!

Andi, big I know everything will work out in the end. It's just always so hard waiting for it to work out. I've been so depressed lately as well. I would just feel so much better if my body would at least ovulate on a halfway normal basis.I've read a lot of positive reviews that women have had on Metformin, but I've also heard a lot of them about Metformin not doing anything for their cycles, too. I'm on the highest dosage I can be and I'm hoping so bad that I'll start seeing some results soon. It's so frustrating

 

[AndreaFlorida]

Praying darling for your body to work right Beth...hang in there......Nicole I wish you were here.....I'd come seriously cry on your shoulder I'm to my last wits with this whole fertility crap

 

[armymama2012]

Wish I was there too hun. You could cry on my shoulder for as long as you needed to.