Sadness= Unhappy baby?

[utbabymomma]

Since I found out we are pregnant with our first, I have been excited and consumed. I was obsessed with reading other people's stories, window shopping for baby gear, planning, etc. However, a few days ago I found out one of my friends took his life.

I am shocked and heartbroken. I know it is a normal part of grieving but I have the added worry of being "too emotional" because I am pregnant. I don't want to do anything to disturb this pregnancy but I also worry I am just going to grow a sad child. Does that even make sense? Is this all just grief driven by an excess of hormones?

I guess I just feel lost right now and needed to share.

 

[spicyorange]

People deal with grief in different ways and sometimes things hit deeper than we think they "should" added with hormones no wonder your going through a rough time but it doesn't mean that your baby will be sad, the live you show them when they are born will have much more impact than how your feeling now. If it carries on our your feel your can't cope speak to your midwife about it but you won't harm your baby by feeling sad about the death of your friend.x

 

[utbabymomma]

Thank you for your comforting response!

 

[crazy4baby09]

My dad passed away when I was 11wks and I was afraid that my sadness would have a negative effect on my baby as well. But now that he is here and he just smiles all the time and is a very happy little man.

 

[xprincessx]

I am so sorry for your loss hun, that must have been a terrible shock.

Honestly though please do not worry about your baby. There is absolutely no reason at all why your sadness should have any negative effect on your pregnancy or your baby. It doesn't mean baby will be unhappy either. You need time to grieve and to do it properly so that you can start to look forward. Take each day at a time x

 

[sbl]

One of my friends died in a car crash while I was pregnant with lo.
I was extremely sad and crying allot but my lo has always been a happy child.
I also had hyperemesis with lo and was pretty sad, lonely ( in hospital) and generally unhappy with being so sick but it had no affect on my lo.
I am sorry for your loss. Take the time to grieve in your own way. It will not affect your baby though if you find yourself becoming depressed talk to your Dr.
Take care. X

 

[utbabymomma]

Thank you all so much! It really does take the worry away knowing that other women had the same worry and their babies are fine. I feel like I've stopped myself from grieving the way I truly need to because of this fear. Hopefully I can let go and let myself be sad.

 

[modified]

I spent much of my pregnancy in a very deep depression. It did not cause any of my latter problems in pregnancy.

I gave birth to the happiest baby I've ever seen. She didn't cry at all for 4 days and it's still, at 6 months, a rare occurrence for her to cry.