Second miscarriage, can't function

[laullypop]

I had my second miscarriage at 9 weeks, we saw had an ultrasound at 8 weeks and everything was looking good but I started bleeding and cramping and had a natural miscarriage - It was an unbelivable amount of pain that I wasn't expecting that lasted 3 days until I passed the baby.
To be honest I don't know the reason I'm posting this but I'm just tired of it all. I don't know how to cope with this loss. I either feel completely numb or can't stop crying.
We have been trying for 3 years and had a miscarriage 2 years ago, and I don't know how much more I can take.

I know some of you have been trying for longer and suffered more losses. How do you do it? I just want to move on and be normal. I feel as though I'm scared to get pregnant in case it happens again, but I'm scared not to get pregnant. I want this more than anything

 

[c beary83]

I'm so sorry for your loss. I had a good scan at eight and a half weeks then at twelve weeks found the baby died a week after my early scan.

It's a devastating thing to go through.

 

[wannabemummyb]

I'm sorry for your loss. I hope that you have the support of your partner and at least one good friend, it's not easy to keep going through. I remember my second miscarriage hit me really hard - I wouldn't let DH touch me other than hugs for 6 months afterwards because I was just terrified I would get pregnant again and wasn't mentally able for it. On the third I buried my head in the sand and the fourth has been a bit in between. I'm not sure I could cope with another, but also not willing to stop trying.

My only advice is try to deal with it, and don't pretend it didn't happen. I hope your ok x

 

[OmarsMum]

Those feelings are normal

I feel the same, I had my 1st mmc in April 2014, and the second in July 2015, both were confirmed at 12 weeks. I'm still not back to normal and the idea of ttc again freaks me out. I didn't move on but I try to divert my thought away from the mcs, I don't know if it's the right thing to do but I don't cope well with grieve.

I'm so sorry for your loss

 

[Autumn leaves]

I'm so very sorry to hear of your losses.

We have suffered two. It's absolutely soul destroying. I've now been signed of work purely for struggling to function. I think I stored away the grief with the over haul of Christmas then it hit me.

All I can say is just take your time, take time to cry it out. Take time to think it over, mull it over and feel all the miserable why me, why how things. And when you feel your done with the sadness then start looking for hope. Small steps...eg five days till ovulating again at least.

It's absolutelty shit. But we will get there, we will have our time. I Hope and pray 2016 brings us our babies xxx

 

[chistiana]

Hi. I m so so sorry for your loss...I ve suffered 3 mcs..my first it was pure grief and disbelief..I didn't think it could happen again..my second happened the day I turned 31..I was so angry, sad, mad..I told dh to forget about me, I went to have the d&c on my own and was just out of myself..at the point my doctor told me I could have another 10 mcs or I could have a healthy baby..that pissed me off so much I put my foot down and said I was going to have that 1/10 healthy baby. My third mc was very different..I closed myself in my room for about a week, hardly ate or drunk anything and then moved on. Whatever feelings you experience are normal, I agree with autumn, just accept that you re not ok, take it one day at a time, cry, be angry, feel whatever you feel and when it's out of you you re still going to miss your babies but you ll also be able to look forward.
I m here if you want to talk. Hugs

 

[mitchnorm]

Sorry for your losses - totally normal feelings. Throw in anger there and you have how feel also

I had two miscarriages last year...one in July and one in December. Both discovered at a scan at 9 weeks - theyd both died within the last 24 hours (measuring 8w 6d-9w on the dot). Heartbreaking - its as if I knew.

I am hating my body at the moment. Waiting to find out if MC no 2 was a molar (had partial molar in July).... you you

 

[Amygdala]

I've had two missed miscarriages, the second one is still in progress now. Babies stopped growing at 8+3 and 9+3 but my pregnancy symptoms etc continued until 12 weeks. It's scary and it makes you doubt your body. But maybe I can give you a little hope. My mmcs were 5 years apart but in between I had two healthy babies. I know it's infinitely scarier to have two miscarriages in a row, especially when you don't have any children yet. But there's also no reason to think that your next pregnancy should be anything that perfect, as well as any after that. I think often, miscarriages are just really, really horrible bad luck. I was unlucky enough to have two despite being able to have perfectly healthy, complication free pregnancies. Chances are you're the same and we're just unlucky to have your miscarriages first.

 

[Laurenmomma]

Iv had 2 miscarriages but iv also had 3 successful pregnancies in between, one was a month after I miscarried!

Il never know why the 2 didn't make it but I'm trying to keep hopeful that it will happen again.

Big hugs to you x

 

[mandy81]

So sorry for your loss...

I know at the minute you feel like giving up and are wondering why you....
i had 2 beautiful children Sophie Louise now 13 and Dylan 9, OH and I decided 3 years ago that we would love to give them a little brother or sister then our family would be complete.

November 2012 i got pregnant we were so happy it happened so quickly, 8 weeks later i had a miscarriage, i never knew anyone who had lost a baby before so i didn't have a clue what was happening, i had never felt pain like it before my heart was breaking.
A year later i fell pregnant again, again at 9 weeks i had a miscarriage, i told OH that was it i would never put my self through that pain again. (but i did)
July 2014 i fell pregnant again on the 5th of september i lost the baby, this time was the worst, i ended up in hospital on a drip because my body couldn't handled the pain...
Again i said that was it, i couldn't put myself and OH through this pain again it was just too much. little did i know that 1 month later i would fall pregnant for the 4th time in 3 years, this time i didn't find out until i was 13 weeks gone, i actually couldn't believe it, when i went for my first scan and they told me i was nearly 17 weeks i cried with joy.
i now have another beautiful son who was born on the 10th of july 2015 and is 6 months old

Never give up, it may take you a while to get there and it may hurt but by god it will be worth it in the end... xx

 

[Amygdala]

Mandy, I'm so happy you got your little boy in the end!