second time around & petrified

[XxChristinexX]

This is my second pregnancy & I am 38...39 when this one comes along. I have a 6yr old son.

Since I got the pos test, I have been getting flashbacks of my labor with no1 & it is scaring the life out of me & making me so tense,which is silly because it`s still early days. Its all that I can seem to think about.
I swore after no1,never again as I found it so traumatic. So here I am 6 years later & having to do it all again!

Every negative thought is running through my mind....my age, fear, anxiety. Can`t seem to give my 6yr old the attention he deserves because of this fear, it is overwhelming me.

Please tell me it is easier second time round, even at my age

God I could go one of these right now

 

[BeachComber]

Welcome and Congrats!! This is baby #4 for me and I have to admit that at first I was feeling similar to you. I have had 3 c-sections and this will be my 4th one and I just worry about all the risks involved even though I know my doc knows what he's doing and everything will be fine.

It's normal to worry when you've had a scary experience. Sending you lots of

 

[XxChristinexX]

thanks, just booked a weekend away next weekend for us, before the schools go back in.

hopefully it will relax me

 

[Mother Hen]

Try to keep from thinking negative thoughts. Not every delivery is the same and this one might be a piece of cake.

I am scared too. I am 40, overweight, and have hypothyroidism. I feel like I have a lot of risk factors, but I am trying to stay positive. Good luck to you!

 

[heresme]

Hi, I'm in the same boat, absolutely terrified that something will happen to the baby, I had an elective c-section with my daughter 11 years ago as every female in my family has had to have an emergency c-section and I was so worried about this that i was booked in instead, I think I am 10 times more worried this time due to my age (39) and because I am overweight : (

 

[xxembobxx]

I was more scared with my second pregnancy than with my first. I think it's because with the first labour you don't know what to expect.
As a PP said no two labours are the same so you are not destined to have the same trauma this time.
Just try and focus on the baby at the end of it - you've been through the worst so this can only be better surely?

 

[Andypanda6570]

Try to keep from thinking negative thoughts. Not every delivery is the same and this one might be a piece of cake.

I am scared too. I am 40, overweight, and have hypothyroidism. I feel like I have a lot of risk factors, but I am trying to stay positive. Good luck to you!

I will be trying soon and I am 41 and I also have hypothyroidism , but I was told as long as it was controlled everything would be fine, I know the baby's thyroid starts working on it's own at 12 weeks, so is there more i should know before trying again for a baby?
Thanks

 

[vintage67]

Add me to the terrified list! 44, overweight, heart condition, diabetes and hypothyroid. Sometimes I feel like the news channels will show up when I deliver, or it will be a headline of some sort! (have to laugh a bit to keep from crying!)

 

[Michieb]

I swore after my daughter i would never do it again either!!! The pregnancy and labor were horrible and i swore that i wouldnt put myself through that again!! So here we are with a lovely surprise #2 - 5 years later!! At first i felt like you - but now i am soooo excited and cant wait to meet my lil guy!! I am scheduled for a c on 11/11/11 - i ended up in an emergency c section after 18 hours of labor with my first
Good luck and dont worry after the shock sinks in you will get excited!!

 

[Emum]

Hi there. I'm a newbie today (first post so be gentle!)

I had a very difficult delivery with my second child, vbac ventouse and my child has severe learning difficulties which are said to be unrelated to the birth but I always blamed myself anyway.

I conceived number 3 when DD was 7 and like you was terrified of the birth to the point where I began to have panic attacks in trimester 2 and burst into tears a few times. I managed though to tell my obstetrician about my fears and he was fantastic. The first thing he did was to go through the notes of my last birth and then explain to me in detail what had happened and listen to what bits scared me. He did this on more than one occasion truth be told. He also told me I could opt at any time to have an elective c section.

In the end I did decide at around 28 weeks that I would have the section and the rest of my pregnancy was much less stressful. I did have the section and it was amazing, the most beautiful birth I've ever had and everyone pulled out all the stops to make sure I stayed calm throughout.

I now find myself 42, and expecting number 4. Yikes! I am very pleased and excited but it is also very early days and I am currently torturing myself with the risks in early pregnancy for older mums. I am only 5+1 so too early for a scan to reassure myself and I am trying to hold out for another 2 weeks before I book one but at the moment that feels like a long way away.

 

[Dorian]

I, too, am a bit nervous. 41, overweight, with both fibromyalgia and arthritis in my hips and lower back!

I have had 3 kids, all natural, with no drugs/etc. I know that I can get some relief, the drugs are there for us to use if we need to . My MW if a wonderful person. So I am trying to just settle down and relax.

There are tons of relaxation things out there, maybe go to a birthing class that will help with your stress. They teach you how to breath right and focus on relaxing, etc.