Self pitying rant alert

[Mrs P.]

Hi all,

I'm new to this site, so hello

I just need to vent a little bit.
Hubby and I are both 27 and have been TTC for almost 2 years now. After trips to the specialist it has been determined that I am not ovulating so am being prescribed Clomid.
I can't start taking this until November as Hubby is currently working away until then.

I'm starting to struggle emotionally with the whole thing tbh! Nobody in either of our families knows as we don't really want them to (mainly because we know how they are and that it would probably makes things feel a whole lot worse than they already do) Sometimes I really want to say something as my MIL and SIL continue to say things like ''You're the odd ones out now'' as all my Hubbys siblings have multiple children, and, ''I can't imagine what you'll be like when you finally decide to have children''
Most people will probably say that if we want that to stop then perhaps we should say something, but it really wouldn't help things, and I know that they would just pry all the time.....it's the way they are. I love them to bits but am close to breaking point now!
My ''so called best friend'' and another friend who I class as my best friend are the only people who know about are problems. ''So called best friend'' is so dis-interested it hurts sometimes. She has 3 different children by 3 different fathers with another one on the way, each time she fell pg literally within weeks of being with new love inetrest. It sounds like I'm being jealous, I'm not.....she just always changes the subject round to herself when we talk and I don't really want to bring this up with her as we've been friends for well over 15 years now.
My other friend is absolutely great.......she calls to check how I'm doing etc and is so understanding, but she is currently going through a sticky divorce and I really don't want to burden her.......
My hubby is currently woking away and we only get to speak 2-3 times a week for a short amount of time, so I don't want to trouble him with this as he would feel awful not being able to do anything.

My goodness I've gone on here haven't I. Sorry ladies, just had to vent to people who may be going through the same as me.
I hope I don't sound like a jealous, self absorbed cow, as I'm really really not, just had to blow off steam somewhere I'm not likely to get myself in trouble
Thanks for listening! Any advice would be much appreciated.

J. xxx

 

[sianyld]

hey hun,
im sorry to hear ur feelin down, my situation is quite similar im 26-nearly 27 and OH is 24!
we've been ttc 15 months now and just yesterday i got diagnosed with pcos from irregular cycles and possibly no O!
i am gutted! a few people i have told dont really understand my situation and my SIL has just got preg by accident! i have no idea how to feel really!

this is a really hard process hun, the only way i kinda make headway at the moment is it to chat on here to the lovely ladies who DO understand and they do make me feel a little better!
i hope u will pull thru this hun and that we'll end up with little healthy babies when our long wait is finally over xxx

 

[Sazaroo]

Aw sweetie,

Im sorry your feeling this way. You're not alone, a lot of the ladies on here feel the same.
Sending you lots of

x

 

[MrsChambers]

Hey, I know how you feel I too suffered in silence but then got to the point that I could really not take the questions and hassle any more from anyone so now I am completely honest to everyone. Everyone knows I have PCOS, and dont ovulate and dont get an AF. It is so much easier people have stopped with the pitying glances. I can talk openly and honestly to a lot of people I have down days and sometimes I think no one else in the world could posibly underdtand how I feel but then there is a friend or family member there that will listen and offer some piece of advice that just brings me back to reality.

It is amazing how many other couples I know who are going through the same thing as me and who after me openeing up have found it easier for them and are even seeing the same consultant. Maybe it is worth thinking about especially if you feel like you genuinely have no one else to talk to with hubby being away it's just some support for you to keep sane. ;-) however you now have all us girls on here xx

 

[Firefox]

Hey, I know who you are feeling too.

 

[Mrs P.]

Thanks so much for all your replies girls.
It's nice to see that there are other people satruggling with the same rubbish day in day out (not that I'd wish this on anybody)
It's a shame that people who do not have infertility issues don't think for a second what it's like for those of us who do!

Hopefully 2010 will be our year
Xxx

 

[babybumpage]

wow, I read your post and I swear, the first part I was like "did I write this under a different name?!?" I totally get how you feel. Husband and I are 28, trying for 3 years now. We don't tell anyone, not friends or family. We recently sold our house and moved across the country (US) and we live in a brand new place where our closest friends are a 4 hour drive and the closest family is a 10 hour flight or 3000 mile drive. We actually REALLY like it this way, because our family is very... controlling I think might be the right word. They wouldn't be insensitive, so in that regard, I can't say I know how you feel and I'm sorry they just won't back down, listen, care and be understanding. I guess that's what this website can be for sometimes. But they just can't know how it is, I don't think anyway. I don't think we even knew how bad it was before we started trying. I had friends who were in this position and I felt for them, but I just thought that it would happen, they just needed to keep trying. Now, after 3 years, I just get it. I know it just can't make sense until you go through it like we are. Your friend sounds just like my cousin. 3 children, she has 2 different fathers, and her kids are in custody of the government because she was neglecting them. She has more kids than she can handle, they have no fathers in their lives, they are in foster care, and yet SHE is the one with kids. Here I am with 2 masters degrees in educating children with and without special needs, and I'm the one that has to wait? Here I am happily married for 3 years to the most amazing man who will honestly be the best father (my kids are going to be soooo lucky to have him as a dad) and yet we are the ones doing horrible embarrassing and invasive procedures every month? So I get the need to vent, I honestly do, since I just did it myself! lol Just know that it has to happen for us eventually, this is just the road we have to take. Our children will grow up knowing that we had to work for them, that they weren't just a thought, that we REALLY had to spend our time, money and love to make them. That's probably one of the best lessons we can share with our children I think.