Shocker!!!

[lemontree12]

Ok so the meaning off paternity leave, is actually to adjust to having a newborn, helping the mother etc!! Well my messed up fob has had the cheek to take his two week paternity!! Bearing in mind he has yet to met our 3week old daughter nor does he ever plan on!!

For me this was it, I went around to his house to have it out with him! Iv only seen him once from Xmas! He had a cheek to say I was a syco, still in love with him ( this couldn't possibly be far from the truth) he refused to come into the room violet was in! He was saying I ruined his life for making him pay for something he don't want!! I actually can't believe the cheek of this asshole! Seriously at what point is he going to stop!! I fell like I cat escape him!

 

[Mummy1995]

What a massive dick, he doesn't deserve either of you! Hugs xx

 

[whatwillbe]

The arse hole, i would of went round to where he works too or called them to inform them he's not at all in babies life, so therefore not entitled to paternity leave, as that is for real dads not just sperm donars! , some men never cease to amaze me.

 

[lemontree12]

I actually think his work are in on it! He works for a big company so don't know how to go above his managers head!! He said he had it off for stress!! Which what could he possibly be stressed about!! Seriously can't believe this asshole! When will he ever see what he has done!!

 

[whatwillbe]

Some men dont have a consience hun, just like my fob and if he does realise what he's done he sounds too selfish to care, mn like that arnt capable of real feelings.

 

[resursval]

Ok so the meaning off paternity leave, is actually to adjust to having a newborn, helping the mother etc!! Well my messed up fob has had the cheek to take his two week paternity!! Bearing in mind he has yet to met our 3week old daughter nor does he ever plan on!!

For me this was it, I went around to his house to have it out with him! Iv only seen him once from Xmas! He had a cheek to say I was a syco, still in love with him ( this couldn't possibly be far from the truth) he refused to come into the room violet was in! He was saying I ruined his life for making him pay for something he don't want!! I actually can't believe the cheek of this asshole! Seriously at what point is he going to stop!! I fell like I cat escape him!

Cant you file a massive complaint so he has to pay the money back?
Surely cant be legal to take paternity leave and not spend time with your child.
Also, shouldnt all paternity leave be yours as he doesnt care about his own flesh and blood?

 

[Dezireey]

He's breaking the law I think? Doesn't the government pay paternity leave for employers? e.g like when statutory sick pay is paid. He is not allowed, period, to take paternity leave at all if he has nothing to do with the child. Something like that would make me enraged, I would go straight to his employer or ring direct gov and tell them he has claimed money where he is not supposed to. What is he going to do next? claim child benefit and pocket that too? Oooh reading your post made my blood boil, what a tosser, let me at him grrrrr

 

[Ceejay123]

What an absolute prick! If i were you, i'd call his employer! x

 

[lemontree12]

My blood boiled when I heard this, I stormed round to his house to have it out with him, something I haven't done since we broke up! His employer is in on it, he's good friends with his manager so can't go to them which I would of done, but didn't no I could ring direct gov! I think I will do that! What annoys me most is he is using my child to get a free holiday! He had the cheek to call me a syco!! Although his mum could to met violet and which hit a nerve with her so something good came out of my visit x

 

[whatwillbe]

I hope you do call direct gov, even if his employers in on it too direct gov arnt, keep us posted hun and thats good his mom met lo x

 

[Dezireey]

Here you go Lemontree, a link to the direct gov website on paternity leave / pay additional leave etc.

https://www.direct.gov.uk/en/MoneyTaxAndBenefits/BenefitsTaxCreditsAndOtherSupport/Expectingorbringingupchildren/DG_10018750

It states at the top that he must be the father of child to qualify and maybe this is what the idiot got confused about? Its not for men that are in effect, sperm donors (hate to use that word but most of these FOB's fit that category, they have done bugger all for most of us) Its there for guys who are actually current partners of the mother and to take time off with their partner who is on maternity leave in order to take care of the child at home, with her and spend time with their newborn, which, uh he has not done. I would also call them because reading between the lines, could they also hold the mother accountable if the FOB is stiffing the government? e.g they could take it back out of your own maternity entitlements perhaps? just a thought. I wouldn't let the ******* get away with it personally, its like kicking you when you are already down. He deserves nothing after what he has done to you and your LO.

 

[Shezza84uk]

he's a vile human being, and to then use the child he claims he doesn't want to get time off work??!! he cant stoop any lower what a jerk!! he doesn't deserve either of you!! x

 

[teal]

Absolutely disgusting using his child for time off work.

xx

 

[lemontree12]

Thanks everyone! I phoned the hr department in his work and they said they are going to look into
It! It will also go into my favour if he tries to fight the CSA who I'm sure will say if she's not ur. Child why take the time off, he's fucked up in the head this boy!!

Thanks everyone

 

[Lemonflower]

What a total pr**k!! I would have gone round his too!

When fob dropped off 2nd hand clothes I took them back to his nans and ranted! I was fuming!!!

Glad you're persuing him with the CSA!

How dare you though mess up his perfect life up though...... Pmsl!!
Grrrr.... This makes me so mad!!! Just cos they have their new "bit of stuff" they think we're a mistake.
Do you think he's worried she'll leave him because of his child?

I could never be with a man who disowns his child!!
They are scumbags - gf's included.

xxxx

 

[lemontree12]

Oh is gf is fully aware of what he's done! She had the cheek to ask me "should u really be having a baby ur not in a relationship with?" we had only been broke up days! Looking back now it was clear he was already with her! When a mutual
Friend of ours said to him that I was in labour his gf said "well we don't care" like she has anything to do with my child! I was fuming when I heard this! I guess all this shit has made me get over that 'boy' I'm started to question wether he is mentally all there! Which makes me very thankful he's not around polluting my child with his fucked up behaviour, my little girl is so happy and content, having him around would only mess her up

 

[Ceejay123]

Well said. That's completely out of order of her... I met my OH before his eldest was born, we got together when his eldest was 7 weeks old... I'd never try to get in the way! It's not a new partners place. When you have a child with someone, you have a child with THEM, for life. If me and my partner split, no new girlfriend of his, or boyfriend of mine would be able to make decisions/comments about my son. She needs to grow up x

 

[Dezireey]

Oh is gf is fully aware of what he's done! She had the cheek to ask me "should u really be having a baby ur not in a relationship with?" we had only been broke up days! Looking back now it was clear he was already with her! When a mutual
Friend of ours said to him that I was in labour his gf said "well we don't care" like she has anything to do with my child! I was fuming when I heard this! I guess all this shit has made me get over that 'boy' I'm started to question wether he is mentally all there! Which makes me very thankful he's not around polluting my child with his fucked up behaviour, my little girl is so happy and content, having him around would only mess her up

I'm with you on this. I think most of them are effed in the head. My FOB sent me an e-mail link about a blog he started with practice writing for a journalism course, he wanted to know if I thought it was any good. Six blogs on there about how devastated he was about his split with his ex four years ago! and the introduction is called 'my life so far' no mention of me or his son!! what a swine! these men have no soul no feelings for anyone but themselves. Crumbs what did we see in them in the first place?? makes my head spin.

 

[lemontree12]

Omg and he has no shame when asking u to read it! This is what gets to me, these men don't see past themselves, I could tell that my fob had no shame in what he had done, I could tell he actually hate me for ruining his life, because he has to pay for something he dont want, it's like banging ur head against a wall! One day these men will grow ul and I sure as hell will not give him an easy road!

The one good thing, surely I won't met a man that will do this again!

 

[Ceejay123]

Just think about what he's missing out on babe, you get your gorgeous child, he gets nothing. X