Should I expect not to have a life in the first few months?

[golcarlilly]

Ok I think I am going to become a pain with endless questions on the subject of BF!!

I have been reading through a lot of the threads and I am getting worried that my entire life for the first few months is going to consist of nothing more than breastfeeding - obviously I know that babies take up the vast majority of your time anyway regardless of how you feed them but it sounds as though I will never be able to leave my sofa!! I am looking forward to the summer and hoped to at least manage the odd walk or even at a push a picnic somewhere - am I just kidding myself? Will it be winter before I can leave the house?

 

[AC81]

As long as you're happy to whip your boobs out anywhere you can have a life! Its true you'll spend a lot of time breastfeeding, but you can still do stuff. Before you have bubba find out where the mothers rooms are in your local area/shopping centre - I'm from Huddersfield too, and the mothers room in kingsgate isn't great!

 

[golcarlilly]

I didn't even know there was a mother's room in Kingsgate - where is it?

I am not happy at all getting my boobs out anywhere so I guess if I choose BF that is me stuck at home forever then!!!

 

[Mervs Mum]

Noooo!! I had her on tuesday night, came home weds morning and was in Tescos (hobbling a bit) by sunday!!!

There will be times when you might not be able to do much for feeding but that will only keep you in if you let it. I wanted to be out and about more than I wanted to feed in private so I just had to learn ways of incorporating feeding in what we wanted to do.

Dont forget you would be knackered anyway with a baby that's up in the night to be FF'd just as much as you would with a BF baby - little babies dont sleep regardless of what you feed them contrary to popular belief!
You will need to rest and recover from the birth too but once you are over that (which I think was quicker this time round and I think our kids are a simliar gap apart) your feeding should really make it easier to get out. I didnt know exactly when she'd need feeding but I knew she wouldnt need to wait long for me to be able to do it.

Ask away! I'm training to be a peer supporter helping other BFing mum's so it's nice to help this way too!!!

Oh and you are in Huddersfield so you have the Baby Cafe's available too - I went there when she was 10 days old for help and support with feeding

 

[Mervs Mum]

Obviously it depends exactly what you want to do. I just wanted to get out. I went straight out after a feed to give me the longest time before either needing to be home or feeding her again. I found once we were out she went longer between feeds too with the motion of the car or pram. I was also happy to be out visiting friends and I knew I could ask to go in their bedrooms to feed.

 

[golcarlilly]

Baby Cafe's ??? What and where are they - ooh this is a whole new world LOL! where do you live?

 

[Mervs Mum]

Brighouse - let me get you a link

 

[Mervs Mum]

Here we go....
https://www.thebabycafe.org/

Baby Cafe is a support group. They are run in different locations in Hudds and Halifax and are fantastic support.

When Hebe was born, I got into topping her up and I really wanted advice on increasing my supply so I could try to EBF her. I went to the Halifax Baby Cafe and got advice and support and it stopped me from giving up. You go and they make you free drinks and you meet other BFing mum's with babies of all ages. You dont need to have an issue - it's a social too!

 

[Poppeteer]

At first I felt really self conscious about feeding Halle in public and as a result I rarely went out.


Then after about 4 weeks of sitting at home, I was ready to whip my boob out anywhere for just a bit of freedom. So I brought a breastfeeding cover and I will breastfeed anywhere!! Travel agents, restaurants, shops, car.... in fact I've booked a holiday to turkey over Easter.... I just dare someone to say something to me when feeding her in public- as long as I'm not openly flaunting my boob then where is the problem???

The way I see it now, is that I don't need to worry about bottles/sterilising/ formula and warming etc etc.... all I need are my boobs- so really if anything it's really liberating!

 

[1st_baby]

I found myself whipping out the boob everywhere I went lol it wasent so bad

 

[golcarlilly]

Thanks so much for the link, I didn't realise there was anything like that available, I know where my nearest one is I drive past it everyday on my way to work!!

I am going to have a trip there before my due date and pick up some leaflets and have a look round!

 

[Brockie]

you definatley can still have a life!! like others have said first few weeks you feed alot but your also tired so i wouldnt imagine you will be planning any major excursions! but you just get used to feeding when your out, or you plan your time out around feeds ie. as soon as baby is fed then head out x

and of course you have saved time before you go out by not having to prepare bottles! enjoy! xxx

 

[Mervs Mum]

Nice one! It's a great idea to go in advance too. We went down that time I was struggling and I'd never seen so many women nursing in one place! The one in Halifax is at Baby Ballet if you know where that is. After the main session with the advisors and MWs some of the mum's stay behind for lunch in the main cafe when that opens straight after. It's really good.

 

[Mervs Mum]

you definatley can still have a life!! like others have said first few weeks you feed alot but your also tired so i wouldnt imagine you will be planning any major excursions! but you just get used to feeding when your out, or you plan your time out around feeds ie. as soon as baby is fed then head out x

and of course you have saved time before you go out by not having to prepare bottles! enjoy! xxx

Exactly! I've got to the point now where on sunday I left the house with no notice and just me, my handbag (not the full changing bag) a nappy and wipes. It didnt matter how long I was out coz I had everything else that's essential with me.

You are definately setting yourself up for success. If you start out believing it's going to be horiffic, painful and you'll have no life then it probably will be. If you set off thinking I'm going to do this and be positive then you'll more likely succeed!

 

[golcarlilly]

I really am going to try and think positively about bf, it is something I really want to achieve! I am going to be a frequent visitor on here over the next few months!!

 

[Chellebelle]

I find it very easy to get out and about now. The first 3/4 weeks were hard, but you're that busy getting used to eachother you don't feel up to venturing out much anyway.

I just feed him up before I go out and if he needs a feed when I'm out, I find the nearest changing room (there's usually a chair in there for feeding) and if there's none I go to a cafe and just put my coat over him a little or use my nursing top or I wear a slouch top and it usually hangs over him. I love going out with him now.

Those cafes sound great too - I'd never heard of them!

 

[Mrs_Nesbit]

Oh good lord nooooo..When your at home being chained to the sofa is ok, but theres nothing to stop you going out. I was in asda and visiting the day after we were out of hospital. Dont rush anything if you dont feel up to it, but otherwise go for it. If you fancy a trip around town window shopping baby will most likely sleep through it and not feed till your back home if you go out a few hours.

Picnics sound like a lovely idea!...you could always wear a bf cover / scarf or even take along a windbreaker to pop up for extra privacy. Fresh summer air would certainly do you both the world of good. xxx

 

[mari72]

The first few weeks are just a bit chaotic because there's no real routine and initially baby feeds pretty frequently because of their small tummies and how easily breast milk is digested but you can still get out and do things, like everyone else has said-just nothing too huge but walks and shopping trips and out for lunch etc are still hugely do-able. I had a c section and got out of hospital on the tues night and i managed my first lunch out on the saturday,not great but certainly not chained to the couch!! Summer will be a great time too as you can go out for walks in the nice weather,muchbetter than the snow that i had.

 

[Kitten]

I've been having all the same thoughts/worries and I'd already decided that I was going to get into a routine of expressing and freezing/fridging milk so hubby could feed too, so I think if I get really paranoid, I'll just take a couple of bottles of expressed milk out with me. There are places I'd want to go for a walk where there aren't even public toilets, let alone baby changing facilities or anywhere to sit and breastfeed so I think I'll just be one of those people who's always armed with a back up! Lol.

 

[mari72]

bear in mind that its not advisabe to bottle feed expressed milk in the first six weeks as this can cause nipple confusion and result in baby rejecting the breast x