Sisters odd ideas of dressing baby.....

[Mum2BKW]

My sister sent me a pic the other day (attached) with the message "even if you have a boy, this is a MUST!"

At this point I must point out that, even if we have a girl, I think this is hideous (sorry if anyone out there loves it, but it's just FAR too pink and frilly for me).

I tried to be jokey and say how I didn't think hubbie's son would be too pleased to see pics of himself wearing that in X years time.... but by her replies it seems she was actually being quite serious! She started going on about how baby has no idea of gender stereotypes or sexuality and besides - "all it's going to do for months is eat sleep poop and cry, so the only fun to be had is dressing it up!"



This is her first niece/nephew and she wants to treat my baby like a doll. Because that's the only interesting thing about him. He might not understand that he's wearing an EXTREMELY girly outfit, but I do! In a similar way I wouldn't dress my daughter in a baby boys suit and waistcoat. There are so many cute clothes for either gender out there, and I'm not having a baby to make some sort of statement about gender equality.

I just can't believe she was serious - but more so that she thinks so little of my first child. She might not care for the first smiles, cuddles, gurgles etc but I'm beyond excited about all those little things that babies do when they're very small - even the pooping and crying! I hate the suggestion that that's all so 'boring' and tiny babies are only for dressing in stupid outfits.



Sorry for the rant, I guess I expected more from my sister.

 

[beccaboo82]

Oh dear! That would be a ridiculous thing to dress a boy in! I am with you all the way on this
No disrespect to your sister but I am more than glad she doesn't have to choose my clothes or my children's lol x

 

[Dani_Ldn]

The frills are cute for a little girl, I would def not be dressing my little man in anything frilly though!

 

[amber2727]

sometimes i think it can be hard for a sibling when you're starting a family. i'm assuming she doesn't have one of her own? I'm also assuming that she's not a teenager? i think it brings into question a lot about 'family' and 'motherhood'.

when i told my sister i was pregnant, her initial replies were shocking and downright mean. fast forward months later, she did end up telling me that she spoke a lot to her therapist about her being older and maybe not being able to have any children and how that made her feel...etc. in hindsight i can see that it was her way of coping (although it's still not okay to act like that). luckily, she's done a 180 and is so excited now, but don't forget that you're the lucky one. remember that. try and cut your sis some slack if you can and don't get disheartened by her bizarre actions.

 

[Mum2BKW]

sometimes i think it can be hard for a sibling when you're starting a family. i'm assuming she doesn't have one of her own? I'm also assuming that she's not a teenager? i think it brings into question a lot about 'family' and 'motherhood'.

when i told my sister i was pregnant, her initial replies were shocking and downright mean. fast forward months later, she did end up telling me that she spoke a lot to her therapist about her being older and maybe not being able to have any children and how that made her feel...etc. in hindsight i can see that it was her way of coping (although it's still not okay to act like that). luckily, she's done a 180 and is so excited now, but don't forget that you're the lucky one. remember that. try and cut your sis some slack if you can and don't get disheartened by her bizarre actions.

Amber you are nearly spot on here! She's 2 years older than me and hasn't had a serious relationship for years. She has always been adamant that she doesn't want children (since she was very young). To start with she was really excited for me about my pregnancy, I was actually really surprised by how great she was! It's only recently that she's started being weird about it. Perhaps it is making her re-evaluate what she really wants, but I'm not sure - she's the type to ignore babies, roll her eyes when they make any sort of noise as they're so 'annoying' - I've never seen her hold or play with anyone else's baby so I would be really surprised if she was reconsidering having her own. But because she was being so great about my pregnancy early on I had thought she was going to make a real effort with her niece/nephew.

You're right that I should cut her some slack, I always wanted children and she didn't so I guess I can't expect her to feel like me.

I just hope she doesn't actually buy any of this stuff There's no way my child will be wearing it!!

 

[silverbelle]

I honestly kind of agree with your sister, gender expectation like pink/frilly = girl are taught to babies, and the baby wouldn't know the difference. Baby boys were dressed in clothes that would now be considered appallingly girly (baby dresses with lace, ect. until they were potty trained) at times in history that were way more gendered/sexist than modern times.

That being said- it's your baby! And you can do whatever you feel comfortable with. I just don't think you should assume that she thinks less of your baby because she doesn't want to impose gender norms on it from the second it's born. I am sure she will love her nephew very much in her own way!

 

[Mum2BKW]

I honestly kind of agree with your sister, gender expectation like pink/frilly = girl are taught to babies, and the baby wouldn't know the difference. Baby boys were dressed in clothes that would now be considered appallingly girly (baby dresses with lace, ect. until they were potty trained) at times in history that were way more gendered/sexist than modern times.

That being said- it's your baby! And you can do whatever you feel comfortable with. I just don't think you should assume that she thinks less of your baby because she doesn't want to impose gender norms on it from the second it's born. I am sure she will love her nephew very much in her own way!

Thanks Silverbelle - it was the statement that the only interesting thing about my baby will be dressing it up that really upset me.

I know that pink is the colour of the samurai and that until the early 1900's it was actually boys that were dressed in pink and girls in blue! But as I said, I'm not having my baby to make statements about gender and if an outfit had a bit of pink in it that would be fine - I just wouldn't dress my son in something that extreme on the pink-and-frilly scale. If she ever has her own kids, she can dress them in whatever she wants (and find them as boring as she wants!)

 

[amber2727]

I was just like your sister! i mean, perhaps not so overt about it, but i kinda still roll my eyes at children...esp when they can speak. *eek* there are a handful that i love and adore, but for the most part, i'm the one always eyeing the puppies instead of the babies.

it's true, maybe she doesn't want kids and thinks they're boring and disgusting. but, i'd be surprised if it's that simple. when one of my best friends told me she was pregnant, i thought 'oh geez, another one bites the dust'. but it did make me think a lot about what my husband and i wanted, and i did in fact admit to my husband months later that perhaps a SMALL part of me was a TINY bit jealous of my friend. and i think for the most part that process of questioning and evaluating is just biological. of course, that's not to say i think that you must have a family and everyone wants one, but i do think it's something people think a lot about when time begins to escape you.

i have no opinion on dressing your little boy in pink (there's a fab red dress we gave my sis-in-law last year for her baby that i want to dress up my little kid in - if it's a boy, then maybe for halloween!)(oooh, and i also scored some knitted hot pink leg warmers i plan to use regardless of whether our babe is a boy or girl!), but i do think that dress is hideous!

 

[Tami]

I think the outfit is cute...but wouldn't dare put it on a boy, lol.

 

[Seren0613]

Hideous, but because of the Disney. I can't stand Disney clothing/decor.

 

[Zfbaby]

Historically pink was a boys colour not a girls but I still wouldn't dress my boy in it. And dh would go mad if I put his son in something pink he wouldn't even let me buy pink cloth nappies that were ridiculously cheap as they were "for girls"

 

[Lawgirl]

I wouldn't even put a girl in that - far too pink and cutesy for me.

 

[briashxo]

Even I like stuff like that for girls, USUALLY, but that it just too much

 

[shelx]

Would be cute on a girl but she had to be joking about putting it on a boy?? Suggest something for her to wear, anything

 

[Bethi22]

Hideous, but because of the Disney. I can't stand Disney clothing/decor.

I agree about the Disney clothes! If it had no picture or something simple on it I think it would be adorable for a little girl.

 

[iluvmyfamily]

wow she thinks boys can wear this?? im not into the whole pink for girls, blue for boys... but this has a tutu attached to it no? i couldnt see a boy wearing this!

 

[LeahJ7712]

I don't like it either and I'm having a girl. I would be scared to let babysit my baby for fear of what they would be wearing when I return.

 

[MrsTurner2012]

You could not put a boy in that!!

I like some frills but not all the time.

 

[sue_88]

That hideous. If anyone gets my daughter something with a tutu or frills on its going in the BIN!

 

[Sweet Lullaby]

Oh dear.. definately not for a boy...