the last week or so i have been desparate to learn a new skill or get back into horse riding or something to fill my days...although the thought of leaving harry for even and hour to do that "something" filled me with dread and anxiety. then last night i clicked...im trying to fill a void! not that i really have a void..i have a beautiful son whom i adore and a house to keep clean and other house-wifey stuff to do etc but its finally sunk in that this is my life now, and although i love it...i wanted to fill my time before we start ttc number 2 in october. so i realised i just have to get over myself...this is exactly what i did before i was a mum...(the "old" me, if you will)...i kept myself busy waiting for the next big thing, instead of living in the moment... And because ive realised this...im fine now!!! i can relax, just a mum and a house wife and wait that little month before we can start the fun of trying for the next. sorry for the ramble!