Well, things did not go as planned today. I woke around 430, thinking I was just anxious to get this whole day over with. Not only did I have my scan but I also had a lot of running around to do for work, which couldn't be rescheduled.
I guess what woke me was that I had to pee, as per usual around that time. Instead of going, I passed a clot about 2-3". I debated on what to do, so I ended up fishing it out (sorry, tmi) and put it in a plastic bag to take to the doctor just in case. From then until about 8 I passed a total of 6 clots which added up to about the size of a golf ball. O collected what I could and went to the appointment. I never really bled a lot, only when the clots were passing and the blood was more watery than what I normally get with AF.
They took me back for the scan and the tech was very nice, told me she understood my history and she was hoping to see something positive. She didn't. She told me that what I had passed was the endometrium and that there really wasn't much left and the doc would tell me what our next course of action would be.
I waited almost an hour to see the doc. She did a pelvic exam and told me that my cervix was now closed but I would see more bleeding, she wasn't sure how long. She checked to see if I was in any pain (I still haven't had any pain which is really baffling) and told me to take ibuprofen if it came on.
I told my sister in law and my best friend. The only time I really broke down was when my brother sent me a text a little while ago. I think I'm dealing with it better this time around, I got most of my emotions out in the last couple of weeks so this was really more closure for us than anything. I'm still very sad. I would have loved to meet this LO but I know that if things are not developing add they should then this is the way nature takes care of it. My heart is heavy today.