Hello Girlies!
Have made such an arse of myself well my hormonal blubbing at fs office did!
Have had results back and ave been referred for lap as it is 70% likely I have tubal damage and to go private and have immediate lap is about 2k where as my local nhs is an 18 week wait which because of xmas etc etc its gonna be April-back end of! I know that isn't long but it is when that will be a month before my ds 6th birthday which will make the gap even bigger which looms in my mind every month we don't conceive and this month is the 3rd anniversary of ttc! The odds are so stacked against us even the specialist said dh results were not brilliant, poor motility and only 4% normal spermies at which point I did blub as I knew this was coming but how do you take that news and dh was trying to be so nice and I had to push him away as it was making me worse and then felt so bad walking through the waiting room obv had been blubbing and people can't help but look! Feel such a mess tonight and specialist has already said that icsi is our best chance to get pregnant and I feel like yelling why aren't we freaking doing that then instead of limboing round what test to do next we are clearly after 3 years not going to do it naturally!!! Grrr think the anger has kicked in ooops!
Tonight for the first time I have questioned my ability to cope with this and I never thought that would happen, But there are people who are worse off and there are still avenues ahead we can try which we will do will just have to be patient and keep thinking that next time could be my time and the best things are worth waiting for! Oh yes they are
Have made such an arse of myself well my hormonal blubbing at fs office did!
Have had results back and ave been referred for lap as it is 70% likely I have tubal damage and to go private and have immediate lap is about 2k where as my local nhs is an 18 week wait which because of xmas etc etc its gonna be April-back end of! I know that isn't long but it is when that will be a month before my ds 6th birthday which will make the gap even bigger which looms in my mind every month we don't conceive and this month is the 3rd anniversary of ttc! The odds are so stacked against us even the specialist said dh results were not brilliant, poor motility and only 4% normal spermies at which point I did blub as I knew this was coming but how do you take that news and dh was trying to be so nice and I had to push him away as it was making me worse and then felt so bad walking through the waiting room obv had been blubbing and people can't help but look! Feel such a mess tonight and specialist has already said that icsi is our best chance to get pregnant and I feel like yelling why aren't we freaking doing that then instead of limboing round what test to do next we are clearly after 3 years not going to do it naturally!!! Grrr think the anger has kicked in ooops!
Tonight for the first time I have questioned my ability to cope with this and I never thought that would happen, But there are people who are worse off and there are still avenues ahead we can try which we will do will just have to be patient and keep thinking that next time could be my time and the best things are worth waiting for! Oh yes they are
!!!
