KittyVentura
Autism Mum
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- Jan 14, 2009
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Hello loves
We don't view "clingy ness" or attachment negatively here at all but just wondered if this was a phase for many as it is making me anxious about pre-school in Jan.
Fin has always been quite independent. Then, aside from when hurt or I'll and only Mummy cuddles will do, favoured Daddy for the most part from about 18 months. If he wasn't all about Daddy he was certainly all about Grandma. If either were an option to do something for him he didn't want me to do it. Things like read a story, do shoes etc.
That has all changed over the last few months and it is at a point where Grandma and Daddy are a little upset by it. He doesn't want to go near anyone bar me. He doesn't want to cuddle anyone bar me and if I leave the room without him? Despair.
He never used to be very affectionate but now wants to cuddle me all day every day. Cuddles when on sofa, cuddles at the dinner table, cuddles in the bath. Pick me up for cuddles when walking, cuddles on the bus, cuddles at the group. And I don't mean side by side, cuddle while you carry on what you were doing. No this is full on, facing me, arms and legs wrapped round me in full hug mode til I HAVE to remove myself to do something.
It is all very nice for me. The affection and favouritism has been a long time coming. But Ian is certainly getting hurt when Fin says things like "I don't want to see you in the morning" and refuses to hug him etc.
We haven't changed routines or had any life events etc to trigger it so I think it is just a phase. For whatever reason he just needs extra reassurance and attention from me right now and that is fine... But will this pass by Jan and if not what can I expect with settling him in at preschool?
Thanks
We don't view "clingy ness" or attachment negatively here at all but just wondered if this was a phase for many as it is making me anxious about pre-school in Jan.
Fin has always been quite independent. Then, aside from when hurt or I'll and only Mummy cuddles will do, favoured Daddy for the most part from about 18 months. If he wasn't all about Daddy he was certainly all about Grandma. If either were an option to do something for him he didn't want me to do it. Things like read a story, do shoes etc.
That has all changed over the last few months and it is at a point where Grandma and Daddy are a little upset by it. He doesn't want to go near anyone bar me. He doesn't want to cuddle anyone bar me and if I leave the room without him? Despair.
He never used to be very affectionate but now wants to cuddle me all day every day. Cuddles when on sofa, cuddles at the dinner table, cuddles in the bath. Pick me up for cuddles when walking, cuddles on the bus, cuddles at the group. And I don't mean side by side, cuddle while you carry on what you were doing. No this is full on, facing me, arms and legs wrapped round me in full hug mode til I HAVE to remove myself to do something.
It is all very nice for me. The affection and favouritism has been a long time coming. But Ian is certainly getting hurt when Fin says things like "I don't want to see you in the morning" and refuses to hug him etc.
We haven't changed routines or had any life events etc to trigger it so I think it is just a phase. For whatever reason he just needs extra reassurance and attention from me right now and that is fine... But will this pass by Jan and if not what can I expect with settling him in at preschool?
Thanks