Surrounded by pink and crying :(

[Saki]

Just rewashed, ironed and packed away all my little girl clothes, tights, shoes, hair bands and even the girly material i had been making things with, finally packed everything in a suitcase ready for long term storage. I feel so sad and so guilty.
Im so happy my little boy is ok and healthy but its like every time he is kicking me i feel guilty that i am sad i am not having the little girl we belived we were having for the past 16weeks...we even had her name and now i feel like i have lost her.
Dont get me wrong i would be devastated if anything happened to my baby boy and i am getting so paranoid that because of how i am feeling something is going to happen to him, but i am struggling to get my head around this.

We dont even have a name for him, my husband, despite being so happy and excited about all the things he will do with His Son doesnt even want to consider names with me. He doesnt understand that i need to bond with this baby again and i dont know if it sounds stupid but his name will give him his first identity and i'll be able to use his name and talk to him again like i know he needs me to.

Can anyone help me? I cant talk to anyone about this because all i get it 'as long as you are both healthy' yes i know that i really do but ive always been worried about being a good mummy and now im petrified again that something will go wrong and i wont be able to be a good mummy or even the same mummy that i might have been before.

 

[pinkribbon]

Is this your first baby? Or do you already have a daughter? Sorry just a little confused as you mentioned you have pink clothes!

I really think picking a name will help you bond with him. If you can find excitement in that it may pick you up and put you in a better frame of mind?

Maybe going shopping for blue may help?

I didn't find out the sex of my bump cause I was scared I'd be disappointed and didn't want to feel that way so I don't really have any first hand experience

 

[Beccaboop]

I know how you feel i was so sure i was having a girl i had a name picked out too i was shocked that im having a boy but after 3 weeks and buying lots of blue clothes and trying to imagine having a little boy and what it will be like and hoping that one day ill gave a girl too has helped i still feel a bit sad when i walk passed the girls clothes cos they are so much nicer but i just have to stop myself wanting to buy them!

 

[Saki]

This is our first baby and because we are at 32 weeks (baby measuring at 34) i had already bought and made quite a lot of girlie girl things.
I am sure once we have a name and i have had a little blue shopping trip ill feel better, its just a pain that where i am baby things are limited (hence me sewing little dresses, shoes, hair bands and burp cloths!) and that the boy things are soo plain! Ive already decided to applique a little blue tie to his coming home white babygro so once i have done that ill be happy!

Im taking something, dont know what, excitement, anticipation i dont know the word, but SOMETHING in the amusement that my MIL has now said 'oooh if he is anything like his daddy was he will be naughty!' about a thousand times! So i guess ill be preparing for daddy and son getting into mischief and may as well stock up on my first aid kit for bumps and bruises now!

Thank you for your replies

 

[blinkava]

This is our first baby and because we are at 32 weeks (baby measuring at 34) i had already bought and made quite a lot of girlie girl things.
I am sure once we have a name and i have had a little blue shopping trip ill feel better, its just a pain that where i am baby things are limited (hence me sewing little dresses, shoes, hair bands and burp cloths!) and that the boy things are soo plain! Ive already decided to applique a little blue tie to his coming home white babygro so once i have done that ill be happy!

Im taking something, dont know what, excitement, anticipation i dont know the word, but SOMETHING in the amusement that my MIL has now said 'oooh if he is anything like his daddy was he will be naughty!' about a thousand times! So i guess ill be preparing for daddy and son getting into mischief and may as well stock up on my first aid kit for bumps and bruises now!

Thank you for your replies

I understand exactly how you feel hun. My 2nd pregnancy I was told multiple times that I was having a little girl, bought girl things, family sent a bunch of girl things etc. I had a c-section and the doctor said what a beautiful girl and thats when I broke down, my poor little boy didn't have a name for the 3 days we stayed in the hospital. I really didn't bond with him either, he either slept in the nursery or my husband took care of him for me I wanted nothing to do with him at first. I feel horrible now looking back and seeing how he has grown into such a mama's boy but the 1st couple of days were really rough. As soon as we named him I feel in love, and I think you will feel the same way too. Now this time I'm told I'm going to have my 3rd boy, but still in the back of my mind I wonder if it's true or will it be another surprise. You will feel much better as soon as you named the little guy.

 

[MrsP2be]

Saki , I can go with little boys and their daddy's getting into mischief together .......

Think it could be the same in this house when my little one turns up !! X

 

[Saki]

Blinkava-that must have been so hard, im grateful in a way i found out before birth, i dont think i would have coped well at all. So reassuring to hear that things turned out ok, the name is so important. Dh still wont commit but i have chosen a name and am secretly calling him that when he is rolling around in there! if we do have another baby in future i am sticking to my guns and remaining team yellow throughout...and if it turns out to be a family of boys at least ill be able to donate a whole heap of little girly outfits x

 

[pinklightbulb]

 

[jenniferttc1]

You won't miss those little girl clothes once bubs is in your arms, and thats a promise
You have so much to look foward too with a little boy. Just picture watching him grow and bond with daddy. You can easily send them out for the day to go fish, hike, play, and do "boy" things while mommy gets a nice day to relax for once

 

[minties]

You have such a fantastic attitude! I'm so sorry this has happened. I'm expecting a girl this time, and would be so upset if she turns into a he. Not because I don't love boys, but because, like you, I have so much pink and I've bonded with her as my little girl.

Boys are really amazing, one of the reasons why I wanted a girl this time around, is that I see my boy as so special, I can't imagine another boy being as lovable and amazing as him.

He's so cute the way he follows his daddy everywhere and tries to copy everything he does. He gets so excited to see him come home from work, he races around showing off, then throws himself into daddies arms for a big cuddle.

He's also extremely affectionate and loving towards me, lots of cuddles and kisses.

Boys are great!

 

[Mummy2B21]

 

[BabyCleo]

i would pick a name, and make some boy clothes! boy clothes can be adorable too. even soft yellows, greens and creams work for boys, think peter rabbit! im sure when you start making things infused with blue, you will feel better.