Swearing around/at children - does it matter?

[DanielleM]

To me growing up I come from working class Scouse background where swear words are part of an everyday vocabulary and yes I do swear, I swear around my kids without even thinking about it when I am in my home environment or talking to friends. But in saying that I do know when I am in different situations I do not swear.

However, my 8 year old son does not swear.

 

[wanna_bump]

well thats a whole other issue to me in a way. When did it become an acceptable, everyday way for people to speak to one another? for me theres no point in making my spoken sentances longer by using unnecessary swear words?! 'Hi fred, how are you do you know the time? rather than 'hi fred, how the f*ck are you? Do you know the b*sard time?! no - so chavy! I grew up in a working class background as does my son now but we dont swear in normal conversations where he is present

 

[JASMAK]

I have sworn around (not at them, nor ever OH) my children (by accident, I try not to). The oldest knows swear words and will tell me 'so and so said the S word'. But, I have told him that children dont swear, and he is to NEVER swear in front of his mother EVER.

 

[pinklightbulb]

I've said "for fuck's sake Eamon" a few times but would never swear *at* him.

 

[jojo_b]

I don't like swearing around children, but swearing at them is disgusting. As are any kind of insults being hurled at a child. Makes me furious.

 

[JASMAK]

I don't like swearing around children, but swearing at them is disgusting. As are any kind of insults being hurled at a child. Makes me furious.

Yes, insults too! My neighbour tells her son he is acting like a sissy girl.

 

[wanna_bump]

urgghh thats awful - poor kid these people really have no idea how lucky they are

 

[jojo_b]

That's unforgivable. People don't realise the power words have to a child. I still remember times I felt humiliated as a child by the things adults said to me. I pray I never make my own children feel like that

 

[babyjan]

I don't swear so I don't expect my children to swear, if he does happen to hear it from outside then I will teach him that he shouldn't use it and its not good words

 

[ShanandBoc]

This sums it up really

https://i106.photobucket.com/albums/m271/shans81/296381_10150414439805429_646490428_10743675_544501784_n1.jpg

 

[jojo_b]

Exactly ^^^^

 

[Yammas]

Its soo unecessary to swear at children can they not think of a better way to get their point across??? I hate it when peiople yell at their kids like that with or without swearing I feel so bad for the child being humiliated like that.

Where I live you cant get away from people swearing but I do think that people could at least try to curb thier language when they can see children around.

 

[alaskagrown]

My cousin and her ex-husband have a foul mouth. The eldest of her two children is VERY poorly mannered and my mom does NOT tolerate his mannerisms at all. When he was punching, kicking, and biting my aunt one time (who just chooses to ignore it) my mom told him not to do that because it hurts her feelings, he told her to "F**k off, b*tch." It embarrasses my cousin when he says stuff like that, but she never corrects him or explains to him why we don't say these words. She thinks it'll just make it worse.

He was 3 at the time he told my mom to "f**k off", he's 4 now and continues to swear up and down like a sailor.

I'll admit, I'm judging. I have a hard time not!!

 

[jojo_b]

I judge too. Can't help it!

 

[Yammas]

Wow I had a child I worked with call a coworker a ******* (she was 3 at the time) but thats as bad as its got really shell have to do something soon because I dont think the school will tolerate that kind of language.

 

[fidgets mammy]

some of the parents that stand outside the gates puffin on fags and swearing are delightful-not!!! one parent told her five yr old to shut up tonight and finn squeled--eeh thats swearing!!! bless him

 

[leelee]

I've said "for fuck's sake Eamon" a few times but would never swear *at* him.

Ditto. Have said that to Max as well, when I have been totally pushed by him. But I have never sworn at him.

My Dad swears and also has a stammer. I don't notice either now, as they are just part of him. Max has heard us swearing but we are trying to tone it down a lot.

 

[Fraggles]

I think its hard for the odd swear word not to slip out but that is totally different to swearing at a child which I totally disagree with. It dissolves their self confidence.

 

[Foogirl]

I don't like people swearing at or around children, but would it really have been any better if those parents had used non swear words with the same intonation and intent behind them? If they'd called him a stupid idiot would they be any less awful? Those words would have an equally damaging impact.

We don't swear in front of Abby. We won't allow her to use those words either but equally there are worse thing children can do than swear.

Someone spoke about how pointless swearing is and it's extra, unnecessary language. This put me in mind of a story my sister told me about a phone conversation she had with her 14 year old son. He was telling her he had walked home in torrential rain and had got "fucking soaked" he would never use that type of language in front of his mum and apologised profusely. She didn't make a big deal about it, other than to remind him not to use that language ( his embarrassment was punishment enough) but as we discussed later sometimes there is just no other word for it and he probably was, well, fucking soaked!

 

[Natsku]

Yeah sometimes you are fucking soaked and no other word really expresses it!

And swearing isn't pointless, its descriptive, it emphasises and it provides short term pain relief - hardly pointless!

And I agree that its the intent behind the words that makes them awful, not the words themselves.