The Am I aren't I Story... Latest Update: Lost my bean :(

[Katiie]

Ive been bleeding since December 19th.
Sometimes passing thick clots the size of my hand (and I have big hands!)

When I went to a&e they tested my bloods which are all fine. Infact apparently they are above average! So my body is coping just fine with the blood loss.

I've already had 2 scans:
3rd Jan ~ Showed Empty 4 Week Sac.
11th Jan ~ Showed Grown Sac with Yolk.

Now I've been told many times by nurses and doctors I've misscarried, I am miss carrying and chances of it becoming a full pregnancy are "very unlikely"
But they can't do anything as it is growing.

Next scan ~ 25th Jan. I should be 7 weeks so I should be able to see a fetal pole & heart beat.
I'm hoping then, ill get my answers.
I've already mourned the fact I've lost the baby. I have no emotional connection to it and I don't feel pregnant. So please don't be afraid to tell me the worst
I just don't want to bleed anymore.

Anyway, this is my story so far, convinced many a time that I had passed it, turns out I haven't yet

 

[_kate_]

Hi, I'm sooo sorry you are going through this. Having been through it twice I know how you feel.
To me it unfortunately sounds like it could be the sac. I would ring your local maternity ward and they should get you in for a scan ASAP.
I really hope it's not, but I'm sure you would rather know soon than in two weeks.

Kate x

 

[ttcmoon]

I am so sorry for you!I have been there twice as well and still trying for our rainbow baby #1.
Please get yourself scanned immediately as advised by Kate.Our prayers are with you.Lots of Hugs!

 

[Katiie]

I rang the hospital. They just said I have to wait 2 weeks.

I'm sure what ever was there has gone.
I just want it all to be over now, not to have to wait another 2 weeks.

Passed another huge clot this morning which went straight into the toilet so I didn't get to inspect.
No other clots since.

 

[ColorMeFamous]

It doesn't sound like what I passed. Well the sac anyway. When I had my early miscarriage I did pass huge clots which I thought were the baby but then I came across the small sac... I was about 5-6 weeks along. Here is a link to my pic. So sorry you have to go through this.



https://m1111.photobucket.com/albumview/albums/ColourMeFamousXx/IMG1264-1.jpg.html?o=2&newest=1

 

[Katiie]

I'm still bleeding but not passing any clots, well only the tiny odd one. Xx

Oh wow. Your picture! I'm so sorry for your loss xxx
I've not passed anything like that x

 

[ColorMeFamous]

Awe it's okay. I have mostly dealt with it. I have the occassional bad day but I know everything happens for a reason I found seeing her little amniotic sac gave me a lot of closure. I hope you can get that closure too

 

[loeylo]

I don't think that sounded like the sac either. In saying that, with my first loss I don't remember passing a sac at all, but with my second I passed something roughly the size of a chicken egg, which was pretty hard and I couldn't have broke it up without bursting it if that makes sense, it was really firm. With both my losses I passed huge clots which sound like what you have described.

 

[Katiie]

I did a test, and te lines came out super dark. Darkest I've seen them tbh.
The lines came up straight away too.

BUT If you have an empty sac do your hcg levels still rise?

 

[Parma violet]

Hi, so sorry to hear what you are going through.

Just to add what you said you passed doesn't sound like what I have passed as the sac. Mine looked very similar to ColorMeFamous but covered in dark, slimey blood. I have been passing clots like the one you described for about two weeks.

I hope you get some answers soon and are able to get some sense of peace.

 

[Lianne1986]

Im so sorry ur going thru this x

 

[ColorMeFamous]

Your levels are rising?? Hmmm... maybe you should get that checked out... I've never heard of that happrning to be honest. I know you can get a positive for up to six weeks but it's worth getting checked out

 

[Katiie]

I'm not hopeful

I've passed 4 big clots in total from the 19th.
It's so horrible. I've had a proper look at all the big ones and it's just lots of small ones.

They found a 4 week sac on the 3rd. So should be a 5 week one on the 10th but with all these clots I'm doubtful.

Test:
https://i829.photobucket.com/albums/zz218/Pimgu/3151620E-7D46-4BA8-9EA6-5A00359E3385-270-0000001AC5F77DFF.jpg

 

[ColorMeFamous]

Wht is the indication for pregnancy for this test? Two lines or a plus and a line? Sorry I just used frer so idk about the others lol. Well keep your chin up! You never know what could happen! I will definitely be checking back for an update. Two more days!! I hope you see your little one. Sometimes with early miscarriages they can give you a cervical stitch and blood clotting pills? Idk if it's too late but that's what my friend got.

 

[Katiie]

Scan isn't till 21st

The test is 2 lines only.
Circle is test/control line

If there's a line in the square box it's positive x
Here's the box:
https://i829.photobucket.com/albums/zz218/Pimgu/313F5C41-5E95-48BB-9C48-B3F3F178AE7F-574-00000046EC05D30B.jpg

 

[ColorMeFamous]

Looks pretty dark to me... you weren't that far along either so I'm not sure why it's so dark! Some ladies get dark preggo tests when they were pretty far along. Maybe your little bean is a sticky one! We shall find out soon! I have my fingers crossed and prayers headed your way!

 

[Katiie]

Looks pretty dark to me... you weren't that far along either so I'm not sure why it's so dark! Some ladies get dark preggo tests when they were pretty far along. Maybe your little bean is a sticky one! We shall find out soon! I have my fingers crossed and prayers headed your way!

Thank you hun, but I think because your hcg levels rise as normal it's an empty sac. No way would they be that dark for 4 weeks.

Anyway, sadly I think I've just passed it.
Long stringy clotty blood, with something clear attached.
I was going to get it out the toilet but didn't, as I was heaving at the thought.

Fingers crossed I pass it all myself naturally and as pain free as possible (still in no pain which is great, the only pain I do have is my shingles returning - dam you stress!) so I don't have to have the d&c.
Ill monitor my hcg tests fingers crossed I go back to normal soon.
3 weeks of bleeding is enough to make anyone a ratty emotional mess

 

[ColorMeFamous]

Awe I'm sorry... I hope you get your angel baby soon!

 

[ErIndoorz]

Looks pretty dark to me... you weren't that far along either so I'm not sure why it's so dark! Some ladies get dark preggo tests when they were pretty far along. Maybe your little bean is a sticky one! We shall find out soon! I have my fingers crossed and prayers headed your way!

Thank you hun, but I think because your hcg levels rise as normal it's an empty sac. No way would they be that dark for 4 weeks.

Fingers crossed I pass it all myself naturally and as pain free as possible (still in no pain which is great, the only pain I do have is my shingles returning - dam you stress!) so I don't have to have the d&c.
Ill monitor my hcg tests fingers crossed I go back to normal soon.
3 weeks of bleeding is enough to make anyone a ratty emotional mess

Hi Katiie
I am so sorry if u have lost ur little bean.
I, like u, have been going through something very similar. I am today 6w4d pregnant with a surrogate baby yet on Tuesday lost loads of blood, not clots like u but it was bright red and there was a lot.
I had an emergency scan where I was told that they couldn't find a heartbeat.
The fertility clinic we are under though says this is quite common as I am still very early and the drugs I'm on could be the cause of the bleed.
I have had no pain like u but do have shingles, again!

I have to wait until Thurs 17th for another scan so won't know anything more until then
x

 

[Katiie]

update:
Went to a&e last night as I filled a pad in 30 minutes on my way home from tesco.
The second I got out the car a huge blob came out

When I got to a&e I was seen straight away, they took my history and were disgusted with how I've been treated by the EPU (they never rang me back and just mugged me off twice).
I had to give a pee sample and do a pregnancy test which came up positive. I also had millions of bloods tested as I've lost so much. Luckily my body is coping brilliantly with the blood loss and all my levels are amazing so no iron tablets for me!

Was transferred to the maternity ward where I was made to wait in a waiting room for over an hour. Eventually a doctor saw me, I had to tell her all my history then she checked me over.
She said my tummy was tender.
She looked at my cervix, which is shut up tight.
She also removed a couple of clots from there.

Scan tomorrow 8:30am in the EPU.

If there's nothing but clots left - I have to let my body get on with it and pass the final clots myself.

If there's a dead pregnancy - d&c will be booked

If there's a growing pregnancy - ill have to go back in 2 weeks.

But the doctor said it's highly unlikely it's still growing with the bleeding.
Sorry about the downer again

I'm currently at the hospital waiting for my scan