Things you wish you'd been told or prepared for before labour

[RaspberryK]

I know my hb team do not automatically give the injection they try massage, upright positions first for at least 30 minutes before the injection is discussed.
Xx

 

[Beanonorder]

I'm going to be asking about it this time too! It hadn't even been that long before she manually removed it. I think she my have done it because it been in labour for so long and I'd also been pushing for two hours to get baby out. Who knows!

Hearing so many of you saying cervical checks weren't painful gives me hope this time around!

I'm going to an international expat hospital this time so I'm really hoping for a better experience. One of the other things that fascinated me in the Chinese hospital is they automatically do an episiotomy at 10cm. I initially refused but ended up getting one an hour later. Thankfully no other tearing.

Anyone care to comment on the 'ring if fire'. This is scaring me the most this time. The hospital didn't do pressure episiotomies, they give a local anaesthetic (sp) so I didn't even know the head was out until the rest of the body slipped out!

 

[Perplexed]

cervical checks, Pap smears, sweeps etc are a bit painful for me (especially sweeps!) but I think due to focusing on contractions I didn't realize I was being checked. I was checked twice until fully dilated I believe. other ladies around here also said cervical checks are painful.

I wish I were warned that breaking my waters would hurt! I actually yelled out lol.

I wish I knew that I would still feel the ring of fire with epidural. I'm sure it's not as bad as without but for me it wasn't just pressure it was actual pain. I was pretty much fully dilated by the time I had the epidural. had pressure/pain/the urge to push quite soon after.

 

[northern_me]

I wish I was more prepared for what happens after a c-section! Everyone preps for labour and rarely anticipate what you have to go through if you end up with a csection out of the blue!

 

[PregnantKitty]

Cervical checks have always been painful for me no matter who does them or how far along i am or in labor or not.
They were worse when having contractions, though. Lol.

One thing i wish someone had told me is that huge blood clots can happen even a couple days later and it's normal. I had one the day after giving birth to my last that was the size of a plum and came out with no warning right onto the floor. The pad i had on couldn't do anything with that much blood.

And yes, the afterlabor pains. I had none with my first so they were quite the surprise with my second.

About the placenta thing.. i never had any issue passing mine but the docs did help with both, but i had an epidural with both so i cant say how much they did and how much i did. Heh.

And last, dont be afraid of an episiotomy. Tearing naturally can be a lot worse, unfortunately, and with pain meds you wont even feel an episiotomy.

Oh and id like to add that breastfeeding can be really, really hard and sometimes it just doesnt work out in spite of the best laid plans and there's no shame in that.

Id reccommend trying for a few days at least do baby can get that colostrum, but if you choose not to BF that is your choice and no one has a right to judge you for it.

And dont be afraid to ask questions from the nurses/doctors. They're there to help.

 

[RaspberryK]

I didn't have an episiotomy, they are not done in the uk as standard and most natural tears heal better than a cut actually.
I had a big baby, no ring of fire (no pain relief) and not a tear just a very small graze higher up in the vagina which wasn't painful at all.
Everyone will experience things differently, I don't know if I just ignored all pain at that point because I was just so desperate to get him out and the relief of pushing against the pressure overrode it.
Xx

 

[Betheney]

Yeah episiotomies are not done often in my hospital either. They said despite the fact being cut is straight and theoretically tears aren't which is the rationalisation behind them. They found that women that they WOULD of cut had much much shallower tears than what a cut would of been or they didn't even tear at all. They discovered they were doing more damage than good so just don't really do them anymore. But doctors don't routinely deliver the babies at my hospital unless your a special case. Midwives deliver at our hospital.

 

[AP]

I ended up with a episiotomy, had no choice really. I didnt mind, except just being stitched up at the time. I had just gave birth, you just want to be left alone It was when I began to use gas and air to stop myself from telling them where to go. It wasnt that it hurt, it didnt, I just wanted to be left alone lol

 

[mel28nicole]

I wish I would have listen more about hospital bags. Spent a total of 6 days in the hospital (3 in labor, 3 in recovery after a c-section) and our hospital was 45 minutes away and DH almost had nothing with him. I wanted to bring snacks and extra clothes and he said we wouldn't need it. He spent 3 days in the same clothes and ended up buying food and items when we didn't need to. We spent so much

The cervical checks hurt me, until my epidural was in and then I felt nothing lol.

I wish someone warned me how awful back labor could be. UGH and that the epidural will do nothing for it lol.

And I wish I was warned how little sleep you would get (if the labor was long). Anytime I managed to push the heart rate monitor off my belly from trying to get comfortable, a nurse was in fixing it.

 

[MeaganMackenz]

I wish I had been told that your water breaking doesn't always happen at once. I had a huge gush before I went to the hospital and another huge one at the hospital. I thought I had finished the first time!

I too also wish I had packed better. We spent so much money on food and I ran through clothes after the second water breaking incident. A bigger bag is needed this time lol.

 

[lisaalove]

Well my labor was unusual I know that simply from the fact of I went in to be induced with my son and the nurse put the monitors on me before they started the pitocin and cm back in a few minutes later looked at the little papers then looked at me confused and said, "You don't feel that?" I was just as confused and said no... very hesitantly. She then told me I was already in labor. I never felt my contractions throughout the whole thing. I felt the back pain and my goodness I felt the cervical checks (though they are always painful) I probably had 5 of them. But when I was 8cm I asked for an epidural because to be honest I didn't want the chance of feeling anything!! So when getting the epidural he said to me alright this will hurt about as much as a bee sting. Then I looked back at him and yelled I'm allergic to bees!!! And that was entirely painful as well... (I'm sure if I had actual felt my contractions it wouldn't have felt bad) finally we started to push, did that for just over two hours with them massaging me every which way possible to try and help me stretch finally they told me they would need to give me an episiotomy. That didn't hurt (at this point u had the epidural they gave me local anesthetic and I was just ENTIRELY ready for him to be out!) The only thing I remember is hearing the perfect 'SHINK' of the shears... which to this day still gives me shivers. After 32+ hours of labor he was finally here. Perfect 8lbs 6oz 21 1/2 inches. Oh, and no one ever bothered to tell me what a mucus plus was or anything to do with it so when I went to wipe in the hospital (in the early stages of labor) I saw blood and started freaking out I yelled for my mom and she just laughed at me and said it's completely normal and not to worry! I mean really after so many months of dreading even the tiniest bit of blood your supposed to be relieved to see it! Still dumbfounded at the beauties of pregnancy, labor, and after birth.

 

[SarahBear]

I didn't experience the "ring of fire" with Violet. Also, as for epitomizes, they do a lot more damage than tearing alone. They cut through muscle and all. Then there's the fact that it's much easier for a "clean" cut to tear apart again while healing than it is for a tear. There is no way I would birth in a hospital that does routine epitomizes! No genital mutilation for me, thank you!

 

[glitterfly]

I wish someone had told me to pack a pillow to sit on for the car ride home. Owwwwiieee. I wont be forgetting that this time!

Xxx

 

[SarahBear]

I wish someone had told me to pack a pillow to sit on for the car ride home. Owwwwiieee. I wont be forgetting that this time!

Xxx

Try a nursing pillow. I had a homebirth and then didn't leave the apartment for 5 days after the birth, so I didn't have the same experience, but I did use a nursing pillow to sit on chairs at home. The nice hole in the middle keeps pressure off your tender swollen bits.

 

[Geo2]

Last time I went to antenatal classes, and they described typically how labour goes and there was a lot of talk about pain relief (which I had no interest in) they pointed out all the signs of labour, included having a show, contractions starting wide apart etc. But what they didnt explain is that every labour is soooo different! For example; I was contracting 5 mins apart, I was only 2cm dilated! Which made me go to hospital way too early and had to spend the day in there in agony, when I could have been at home and took a bath and bounced on ball, instead of being confined in a ward behind curtains for the entire day! I had no show, until I was in active labour, and throughout the whole labour my contractions were only a couple of mins apart. One thing to know is that Labour is Labour - extremely hard work indeed! The focus should be on staying as relaxed as possible then that way you can stay in control. Also its nothing to be scared of, we all make it through, even if we say, we cant do this anymore, thats when your nearly there, we all make it through, there is no failure here.

 

[Zephram]

I don't remember finding the check for dilation painful at all, but every woman is different.

My baby was OP/OT and I felt no contractions in my stomach. NONE! Seriously, I'd never even considered this in my life before I was in labour. I figured that labour pains would be in the same place as period pains -in my lower abdomen at the front. But no! With a baby that was basically back to back I felt no pain in my abdomen and the most horrific pain in my lower back and tail bone as baby was pressing on my spine. It was completely so far removed from what I thought labour would feel like. I ended up getting an epidural (which only partially worked) because of it.

I was also induced and it was a weird experience as I had to be constantly monitored with electrodes on my stomach. So water birth was out, as was walking around much before I got the epidural.

I have to agree with whoever else mentioned the waiting around. I was induced and it ended up in an emergency c section after some complications, but despite the fact that it was an 'emergency', I had to wait about 3 hours I think before actually having the c section as there were women in more dire straits than me who needed to go first. So I lay on the bed and played solitaire on my phone and hoped my baby was going to be okay while my OH tried to sleep. So weird!

 

[Dolly84]

Yeah my cm checks didn't hurt, but I only arrived at hospital when I was almost 10cm so only had 1! I wish someone would have told me that the pushing stage would feel sooo nice compared to 10cm contractions! I was quite scared of that bit but found it to be the most enjoyable. 2 pushes and he was out. 👍😊
Also I didn't realise our hospital doesn't cater for the dad when it comes to meal times, I was being fed a meal and hubby had to nip out to the chippy.
Also I had a 2nd degree tear and I wish somebody told be they shove their finger up your bum to check for any rips going to your back passage! I was quite shocked ☺️

 

[Beanonorder]

I also agree the waiting around is painful! I arrived at the hospital just before 11am, ten hours after I woke up in labour, with contractions 3-4 minutes apart and I still didn't give birth until just after 1am the next morning!

 

[ambertwogood]

Well, I haven't experienced labour yet but I know that when my OB checked me Last week it was quite painful and I remember thinking my god what is that going to feel like when Im in labour? I actually feel a little envious of those of you that don't think they're painful. I've also heard horror stories about ob's putting their whole hand/arm inside you, which the thought of is absolutely horrifying.

 

[Wannabe Mommy]

I had a lot of fears about what labour would be like. In reality while the contractions were painful they were manageable. Pushing was a relief and the ring of fire was over and done with in a second.

The stitching up afterwards as I had a second degree tear was lengthy but I had gas n air for the really sore bits and the rest of the time I was so absorbed in my LO that I couldn't care less what they did to me.

I had the injection and delivered the placenta with one tiny push which felt like nothing compared to my LOs big head

I'd do it again in a heartbeat and considering how many peopl go on to have baby number 2,3,4,5...... The experience can't be that bad!