Thinking of a 3rd, but 34 now and had previous complications.

[NashiPear]

Sorry, I am jumping the gun a little as I am not 35 until next year and I have only just had my second.

All my life I have imagined having 3 children. It is just stuck in my head. I have two gorgeous children (girl, boy) and the newest is 2 weeks old.

I had trouble with my first (breech, caesarean, too much amniotic fluid, post partum hemmorhage and then a baby with hip dysplasia, reflux and food allergies). The pregnancy was pretty good apart from a good dose of all day sickness and I was quite healthy. The problems started after birth with hemmorhage and my unhappy little camper.

So when I was pregnant with my second I thought, "I will see how this goes" and if i had a rough time, then this would be my last. Well it was rough. I had spotting through first tri, in second tri I developed polyhydramnios and it caused me to leak amniotic fluid (lucky it was a leak and not a full break) so I had pPROM too and became high risk. So they prepared me for labour and loss at 22 weeks. Luckily we hung in there and lasted until 36 weeks. He was a good size and healthy and even missed special care. However, I tried for a vbac and got a 3rd degree tear. I tried for active delivery of placenta (injection), but it was still stuck fast. They gave me as much time as they could to deliver it naturally, but I was bleeding pretty bad and was taken to theatre. I had a failed spinal and so they decided to give me a general anaesthetic, which I started to scream when given (supposedly it causes extreme pain in a minority of people). They fixed me up, but the blood loss meant I had my second post partum hemmorhage. Luckily, both times I have coped extremely well with the blood loss and managed to recover without the transfusion they were thinking of and just a lot of iron supplements.

Anyway, you would think all that would put me off, but I am so in love with my two, I keep thinking maybe I do want a third (if my body blesses me with one). The obstetrician has said I could have another if I wanted to, but there are some risks involved and I would have to expect it would be likely that I would end up in theatre as I did with my other two.

Anyway, sorry about the long winded saga, but has anyone had multiple children and does it get much harder as you get a bit older? I don't plan on waiting too long and know plenty of people over 35 who have had children no worries. It is not so much the age, but the fact that I have had complications to date and I am not getting any younger.

Has anyone had rubbish pregnancies/labour for first or seconds and then gone on to have an easy one? Or have you had more problems with each one? I will meet with a specialist before I try again, but I think it is too early for that. I am just shocked that all this hasn't put me off.

Any experiences would be appreciated. I am wondering if I am crazy!!

 

[DeeM73]

Hi there I'm 37 and pregnant with my 3rd will be 38 when baby is born.I have 2 kids(girl and boy) age 13 and 12.I always imagined I would have 3 too and I'm blessed to be pregnant again.I never thought I would have another as the kids have grown to be independent and it was like starting all over again but for the past few years I have felt broody and thought well if we are going to do it try now rather than later.With my daughter I had to have a section because she was breech and with my son he was a natural delivery,he was supposed to be a section too because he was also breech but turned a week before I was planned to go in I thought I got away with the perfect birth but had to go into theatre because the placenta had apparently attached to my c-section scar So far I've been feeling ok as have the other 2 pregnancies but this will definitely be my last one!! I would say go for it!!! Can you not plan a section because of your previous history? Good luck and keep us posted x

 

[suzimc]

Hello, you're right it does get harder when you're older. I'm 35 now and struggling at times with being pregnant with number 4 but I'm comparing that with being 25 with number 3! I've also had complicated pregnancies and have had to have 3 sections so far so no choice with this one. It's always worth it sweetie, if you feel there's still a little one out there waiting to call you mummy then you'll put up with hell and high water to bring them into this world. Like you I think speaking to a specialist will be worthwhile, my pregnancies were not as complicated as yours just a spot of placenta praevia and huge babies with a small pelvis. Good luck with whatever you decide to do xxx

 

[NashiPear]

You are right. I think if I keep wondering. I did find this last pregnancy (at 34) harder than my first two years before, but I spent 22 - 30 weeks on modified rest which left me unfit. I exercised right through my first. I will have to ask about the c-sec versus the vbac. I still hemmorhaged after the c-sec so not sure if it is the best option, bt I am open minded. I think my vbac was easier to recover from, even with the bad tear, but because of the retained placenta I was told prior to going to theatre that they might have to open up my c-sec scar. Luckily they didn't otherwise I would have been a mess! Anyway, thanks for your thoughts ladies. It is amazing what we put ourselves through for a little one.