This is my story sad but true

[Wobbles]

PoodleMommy how incredibly insensitive of you, ouch! I'm sorry I never got to delete your comments before rossyrozela viewed. I think it's best you consider avoiding the loss sections in the future.

to you rossyrozela.

 

[SIEGAL]

I have no words. But my thoughts are with you. You may feel like you won't be able to get over this but the human psyche is incredibly resilient. Although you may feel like it will take forever you will feel better sooner than you think (really, I learned this while studying psych)

 

[Andypanda6570]

I have no words. But my thoughts are with you. You may feel like you won't be able to get over this but the human psyche is incredibly resilient. Although you may feel like it will take forever you will feel better sooner than you think (really, I learned this while studying psych)

Please don't take this the wrong way because I really do NOT mean to offend and I am not sure if you ever lost a child but no college degree or class on psyche will ever ever prepare you to loose your child, in my opinion there is no other grief in the world that is not only most painful but the one you never get over. You can never in a million years understand the pain unless you have experienced it and no class on anything prepares you for the reality of life. I agree in time you do feel stronger but NO you will never get over this, that is until it is your time to leave this earth. As I said no offense..

 

[SIEGAL]

I was just trying to help. I wanted her to know that how bad she feels now, she will feel better sooner than she thinks. Just so she knows the suffering will let up a bit. I didn't mean to offend. I can erase it, just let me know if you think I should so you can erase the quote too.

 

[Andypanda6570]

I was just trying to help. I wanted her to know that how bad she feels now, she will feel better sooner than she thinks. Just so she knows the suffering will let up a bit. I didn't mean to offend. I can erase it, just let me know if you think I should so you can erase the quote too.

NO NO NO please I didn't mean to upset you or hurt you and like I said in my post please don't take offense. I know you were only trying to help But the point is you don't feel better sooner it takes such a long time, it has been 9 months for me and I am still a mess . Please I didn't mean to upset you, but again if you have never went through this awful thing ( And i hope to God you have not or never will) nothing prepares you or your body for this immense pain.
XOXO

 

[dnlfinker]

I just wanted to say I am sorry for your loss to Rossyzella [removed by admin] I was told at my 12 weeks scan that my little girl had a club hand and was missing some fingers. We been going in and out of the hospital for 6 weeks trying to figure out what was going on . We were fighting for her life , but with every scan they keep seeing more and more problems. My little girl was indeed missing two bones in her arm( her arm was bend in all the way and she had no movement and feeling in her arm-> it was just hanging) the decision to terminate that we made( almost at 19 weeks of pregnancy) was purely on the fact that she was not going to have the good quality of life. There was great chance of other birth defects with heart, kidney , breathing and other abnormalities.

We all do the best that we can , and I am more then sure that you did the best know for the welfare of the child. Your heartbroking and guilt can not be cured, but your child knows that you did it for her, becuase you wanted her to have good life

THis group is truely amazing and everybody is here if you need to talk. Feel free to PM me anytime , I will be more then happy to speak to you

Natalie

 

[Andypanda6570]

I just wanted to say I am sorry for your loss to Rossyzella [removed by admin] I was told at my 12 weeks scan that my little girl had a club hand and was missing some fingers. We been going in and out of the hospital for 6 weeks trying to figure out what was going on . We were fighting for her life , but with every scan they keep seeing more and more problems. My little girl was indeed missing two bones in her arm( her arm was bend in all the way and she had no movement and feeling in her arm-> it was just hanging) the decision to terminate that we made( almost at 19 weeks of pregnancy) was purely on the fact that she was not going to have the good quality of life. There was great chance of other birth defects with heart, kidney , breathing and other abnormalities.

We all do the best that we can , and I am more then sure that you did the best know for the welfare of the child. Your heartbroking and guilt can not be cured, but your child knows that you did it for her, becuase you wanted her to have good life

THis group is truely amazing and everybody is here if you need to talk. Feel free to PM me anytime , I will be more then happy to speak to you

Natalie

I didn't think you had a curse word in you, you are hysterical ..I just love you..XOOXOX

 

[DueSeptember]

Aww I am sorry you had to go through that

 

[dnlfinker]

Oh yea Andrea! I sound sweet on the outside but very sour on the inside once i get angry. She hit the spot because she was saying that one should not terminate because of hand. Since my little one had hand issues, it brought bad memories . As if she was saying that i am such a bad mom for terminating because of the hand. I did so much research on my daughters issues, there was very high percentage of other poroblems. It was very difficult decision to make, especially we would not know. Children with vectaral association have very hard life and have very low lifespam. Watch this video and educate yourself before you speak out. You should be ashamed


https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct...alK-OeQrtZk9gPDIA&sig2=YFQZo8FnBR01Tg9c-w4swg

 

[Wobbles]

I understand the upset some comments can cause on BabyandBump which where possible and necessary the team will intervene (like I did on this issue) however throwing abusive messages around the forum is not acceptable. I have removed/edited inappropriate activity from the thread which isn't helpful to the OP either.

 

[rossyrozela]

Iam sorry to hear about your pain,i can feel your pain and like you when i did decide to go ahead with the termination i was 100% sure that i made the right decision,iam still very sure about that,i was also told she had so many heart defects and kidney and alot of fluid in the head.
Iam just wondering,have you got other children and would you consider trying again?did you consultant tell you if that would happen again in future pregnancies?

 

[rossyrozela]

Just wondering if any of you mums who have gone through so much pain ever thought about trying again and what worries you most when it comes to making that decision.I want abbay so much but iam so scared to death.Iam not young either (39) but still wants a healhy normal baby.

 

[mhazzab]

Just wondering if any of you mums who have gone through so much pain ever thought about trying again and what worries you most when it comes to making that decision.I want abbay so much but iam so scared to death.Iam not young either (39) but still wants a healhy normal baby.

I've still got no idea what went wrong with my pregnancy, I went into spontaneous labour at 23 weeks and delivered my twins. All test results came back clear - there was nothing wrong with my daughters, or me, apparantly just one of those things. The did find evidence of group B strep, but couldn't tell me if that caused my waters to break, or was a result of it.

For a few days after delivering my girls, I told my husband that there was no way I would go through that hurt and pain again, and that if we wanted children it would have to be adoption. It didn't take long for me to become obsessed with TTC. For me, it felt like that was the only thing that would get me through this. I wanted to hold a baby in my arms and take it home. Of course, I was terrified, but, I can't imagine not being a mother to a child that I can hold - that pregnancy was my first.

I got my BFP 2 days after my due date, 17 weeks after delivering my daughters - it felt kind of like a gift from them, and I'm due almost exactly on their first birthday. I'm now almost ten weeks pregnant, and, as time goes on, I am getting more and more freaked out that this will happen again. I think it's going to be like this for the whole pregnancy, but, if I get a baby at the end of it, it will all be worth it. And, if the worst happens again, I'm just going to have to give myself time to grieve and try again. I refuse to go through life without a child and to give in to the fear.

we are all here for you, and, if you do decide to TTC we will support you through that and beyond.

xxxxxxx

 

[Andypanda6570]

I understand the upset some comments can cause on BabyandBump which where possible and necessary the team will intervene (like I did on this issue) however throwing abusive messages around the forum is not acceptable. I have removed/edited inappropriate activity from the thread which isn't helpful to the OP either.

I understand you had to do it (Remove the FU) , but if you knew Natalie like I do I just didn't think she had it in her. I know it was wrong, but I am glad she sticks up for herself. Thank you for taking care of this for us

 

[rossyrozela]

Congratulations and i admire your strenghth .Even with normal pregannacy without complications you still worry.What happened to me had never happened before and i remember when i was pregnant with my now 3 and ahalf son,i was always worried that anything can go wrong.I wish you good luck wth this pregnancy and i think this shows that you deserve to be amum,I will be thinking of you as you go through your pregnancy(I call it journey) share it with us .That was abig present from your girls and iam sure they are taking care of you ,looking after you and pickle.When you talk about your girls that are now in heaven it reminds me of myself,i also lost agirl at 20 weeks and 5days,they took away something from me something that i didnt have and have always wanted.I have three boys and in my family i was the only girl and i have always wanted to have agirl.Iam not exactly aspring chicken as iam 39 and iam thinking time is running out for me but again iam hoping that i can try again and hold my little one one day in my arms.Thanks you so much and iam sory for your lost.Iam happy that you are pregnant again.It gives me hope.Continue being kind and loving for those who needs it ,you have made me see things in apositve way and also all the other girls,they have been so wonderful,so kind,so loving,iam lost for words.Who needs counselling when we have good and experianced mothers like the ones on here.

 

[Andypanda6570]

I would give anything I mean anything to know why I lost my Ava ( At 20 weeks) her cells did not grow so I will never know. I am trying again but it has taken me almost 9 months to get the courage to do this. I am terrified
I had 3 healthy boys 20,17 and 11 and then at 40 I never had a clue that anything would go wrong, all my pregnancies were fine normal and we did not do any testing then, I also was 21, 23 and 30 when i had my boys. I never thought in a million years I would get pregnant on accident at the age of 40 and with a girl, I was overjoyed, i finally was going to get my little girl Now I go to a grave every other day. My life is just different and hard now, I cry ALL the time and I miss Ava. But I think for me NOT trying again is more terrifying than never trying again

 

[dnlfinker]

Hi Rossyrozela and everybody,

I appologize I have got too upset with the user, she really got me agrevated there. I do have 2 year DD ,She was was life safer when I lost her little sister. It felt like my world was over and I didnt know how to get on my feet. If it was not for her, I would probably you know what...........................
Like many others on this forum , all my test results came up fine , they didnt find the reason for her abnormality. I was told that it happened by acccident and that the chances of that happening was 1 in 31,000. Yea I would consider myself pretty unlucky. I have issues with PCOS for which I have took Chlomid to help me get pregnant. Its one of my biggest regrets because no matter how much doctors keep on denying this , I feel guilty that I took Chlomid and did this to her. I have read an article from Department of Drug Administration and they say that there is not enough cases to prove that Chlomid can cause birth defects but thats because most women choose to terminate. When it comes to making decision about a life of a little one , there is no right way to do it. I too feel that I have made the right one , but at the same time that decision feels so wrong.

We have been TTC for the last two month with no success so far. I am starting to feel taht I will not be able to be pregnant again without the meds
but there is no way I will take it no matter how safe they say it is


THank you for reading

Natalie

Iam sorry to hear about your pain,i can feel your pain and like you when i did decide to go ahead with the termination i was 100% sure that i made the right decision,iam still very sure about that,i was also told she had so many heart defects and kidney and alot of fluid in the head.
Iam just wondering,have you got other children and would you consider trying again?did you consultant tell you if that would happen again in future pregnancies?

 

[dnlfinker]

Hello,

I am sorry that I crossed the line , but as it is seen PoodleMommy was
was extremely rude. Several members of this forum have already discussed this before and we voted on making this part of the forum private to avoid people like PoodleMommy to come in and cause pain and aggrevation to others!

Would it possible to have users join this forum only with your permission , given a short summary why they would like to join.


On behalf of this group, I would like to thank you in advanced
for your consideration

Natalie

PoodleMommy how incredibly insensitive of you, ouch! I'm sorry I never got to delete your comments before rossyrozela viewed. I think it's best you consider avoiding the loss sections in the future.

to you rossyrozela.

 

[Nikki_d72]

Hi rozzyrosela,

I'm also 39 and like you, feel that time is running out. I have an 8yo DD (nearly 9) who longs to be a sister and we also still long for more of a family. At first though I also said "never again" as did my DH, but it didn't take long for me to change my mind on that and become obsessed with TTC as well! I found it easier to give myself the green light after my follow-up appt, as although they couldn't really give me any answers, they did give me a good plan for any subsequent pregnancy, this made me feel a lot better, as it did DH. we never discussed again it till after that day and we realised that our reasons for wanting another baby hadn't changed, only fear would stop us and we don't want to give in to that. we know it will be terrifying but hopefully we will get our rainbow and it will all be worth it. We will never forget our boys though one way or the other. I hope we can support you on your journey, be it TTc or not. xxx

 

[rossyrozela]

Oh girlfriend,iam sorry for your heatbreak and i know you will have another baby,iam like you time is running out for me and i have 3 healthy babies,iam 39 and i have a 20,11 and 3and ahalf.I was also not trying to have ababy,it just happened and now that i have lost my beautiful girl,i want to try again.I lost something i never had,a girl.I worry about my age but again when i read about women in their 40s trying to get pregnant then i loosen up and it gives me hope to know that iam not the only one.Also because i had previous c-section with my 2 and when i had the surgical abortion i was told that if i get pregnant i might suffere amiscariage.the thought of all that is playing on my mind.