This nurse needs to be fired

[fairycat]

I'm 3w6d pregnant, and yesterday after a bowel movement I had some light pink spotting only on the tp for about an hour and a half (I kept checking - then it was completely gone). I got freaked out, so I called my doc's office for some reassurance, and I got the complete opposite!! She immediately started talking about a chemical pregnancy, and said, "Technically you haven't missed your period yet. Most women wouldn't have even known, but you took a test." Like 1. I'm not truly pregnant, and 2. how dare I get excited and take a test!? Wtf is up with this lady!? She got me so freaked out I went out and bought more of those Clearblue with week estimators. Well, it went up to 2-3 and my Wondfo line got darker. Who the hell is she to tell me I'm having a chemical? I was super excited to be pregnant again, and now I'm just stressed out as all heck because of her. I am so pissed.

 

[Bekah78]

So sorry you got a thoughtless nurse. I think sometimes they forget how emotional this journey is.
Hope the spotting is nothing serious and all is ok. Best of luck and hope you have a healthy pregnancy.

 

[fairycat]

Thanks I appreciate it! I was so excited, now I feel like I have taken 10 steps back and I can't get excited yet. :\ They totally do forget how emotional it is.

 

[Rei]

I have learned to never call the doctor's office for bleeding and expect to get a reassuring answer. Bleeding is never a good sign and they want to prepare you for the worst.
If it makes you feel better though I've been spotting on and off since my period was due and we saw a healthy heart beat today. I wouldn't be too worried unless you start bleeding heavily.

 

[LacePrincess]

I'm so sorry. Dr's offices can be really insensitive. I realize they see a gazillion patients and that they probably have compassion fatigue, but frankly if they're so burnt out they start treating people like crap they need to quit or take a sabbatical.

My first early loss was a HUGE shock. When it happened I had already booked the first prenatal appt for 8 weeks, so I had to call and tell them what was happening which is so hard. Instead of having any compassion at all, the dr's office was pretty much "oh well - I guess you won't need the longer appointment slot, you can have 5 min with the doc instead". They couldn't even say "I'm sorry". Rather it was, now that you're not even preggo you'll be booted back to a minimum time slot, too bad for you. My trauma was already bad enough and the dismissive dr's office traumatized me so much worse, it was unbelievable. I ended up firing them but it was horrible.

I don't love being an IF patient now, but if it's one thing IF clinics usually do well is they have a lot more compassion and sensitivity about losses. I appreciate that if things go south again I am at least getting taken seriously and not being blown off and ignored.

Also, even though it's really worrying, bleeding and spotting really are quite common in perfectly normal pregnancies. It's never reassuring of course, and before this one I've never had so much as implantation spotting in my life! It's always heralded the witch. And yet with this one at 10-11dpo I spotted, at 12dpo I bled bright red (thought it was AF!), but it stopped totally and spotted brown for a few days. I got my bfp that weekend and no more spotting since. So weird, but anything can happen! Mind you I'm also on aspirin for the first time I've gotten a bfp, so that could be causing unusual bleeding too. I just wanted to reassure you that it can totally happen and not mean anything.

 

[fairycat]

Thanks so much Rei and Lace!

Lace - my spotting was at 12 dpo too. I haven't seen any since, and that was 3 days ago. I officially missed my period yesterday, just want to call the nurse back and be like, well I missed my period, am I officially pregnant yet? Ugh!!!

I had to change doctors last time before I lost my first pregnancy. I didn't look at the ultrasound, because I was aware something was wrong since nobody was saying anything and he was in there for a while. He took the ultrasound thingie out and basically told me I would miscarry. Didn't explain anything to me. I love the doctor I switched to, and if it weren't for him I would totally switch places. I will tell him that too if I make it to the ultrasound.

It's just so hard not to worry when you've had a loss before, but then to have someone completely insensitive tell you you'll have a chemical is just ridiculous! The doctor didn't want me to have any extra stress, and she stressed me out big time! I'm pretty much over it now since I haven't had any spotting or bleeding since that one time. Heck, if i wouldn't have tested I'd probably think it was implantation and be on my merry way. But I'm not sure you could have pink implantation spotting 5 or 6 days after you implant.

I don't ever want to call that place again with questions!