TMI.... sex question

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - Second Trimester' started by PrincessSoph, Apr 7, 2009.

  1. PrincessSoph

    PrincessSoph Well-Known Member

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    sorry if this is TMI just wondered if anyone else is feeling like this at the mo.

    me and hubby were having :sex: and i was finding it so uncomfortable and awkward. after DTD i burst out crying saying i felt so fat and felt bad that i couldnt have :sex: like we used to as i dont feel as mobile as before :blush:

    he told me not to be stupid but i cant help thinking about it now and im only gonna get bigger :cry:
     
  2. Tsia

    Tsia My MyloMan - he turned 1!

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    oh babes dont worry. I have this feeling too. Scared I will become 'boring' in the bedroom.. but had a word with my mum about things (always been able to talk openly about this stuff to her) and she says there is other ways to liven up stuff in the bedroom before the 'deed'. And shes right.. massage.. oral.. playing.. toys.. Food.. yoghurts.. mmmmmmmm
    shame my mans in the dog house! look what hes missing out on! lol
     
  3. LucyEmma

    LucyEmma Well-Known Member

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    i feel excalty the same! i hate it, i cant do all the things we used to and i feel really fat all the time now and i keep crying afterward because i feel so bad its not the same as it used to be. OH says he doesnt mind but i get worried he does! x
     
  4. ShadowRat

    ShadowRat Well-Known Member

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    Awwww honey, thats totally understandable that you're getting emotional and things... We've been having it a lot less often, but we're ok wih that: I'm just not that comfortable, like you say, and I don't really have the energy most of the time! But when we do DTD, we're trying new, comfortable positions (spooning is very nice :winkwink: ) and generally not expecting too much of each other.
    Don't do it if you dont feel comfortable, maybe just ask him for some cuddles or something instead :)

    xx
     
  5. Kimberly28

    Kimberly28 HappyMum-2boys1girl <3

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    I'm so glad that I'm not the only one with this going on. I was so shy to say anything about it as I've always been the kind to keep what goes on in the bedroom private. But now that I see others are in this boat too I can feel more comfortable talking about it with you ladies. I too feel really big and like I just cant be as much fun in the bed as I used to be. We have to be careful about what positions we use and when I get on top I honestly get tired and feel even fatter. We found one position where I lay on my back and him on his side and I put my right leg over him and my left between his but I'm not supposed to be on my back much. :dohh: I don't know what to do. I just feel like I'm this fat whale that's trying to be and look sexy for him but only looking like a fool even though he of course denies it. He says I'm sexy as ever. I just don't feel it and I too often feel like crying. :blush: Damn hormones!
     
  6. Mimiso

    Mimiso Mum of three

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    Hi Jays Wifey,

    If its any consolation I felt the same this morning after 'doing it' too. I just felt really fat and embarassed and to top it off I have SPD so cant move around at all. I spoke about it with my OH and he said the same as yours that he doesnt see me that way at all. Still it is hard to get to grips with when you suddenly change and cant do what you used to be able to do. Dont worry about it love, its all these hormones buzzing through our bodies:hug:
     
  7. PrincessSoph

    PrincessSoph Well-Known Member

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    thanx girls, glad im not the only one feeling like this. just hope i dont feel like this til the end of the pregnancy. i just dont see how hubby can find me sexy when i look so much bigger and aint as energetic in bed any more. lets hope we all feel better about it soon :hugs:
     
  8. Boothh

    Boothh Jesse, Teddy and 4 angels

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    it is getting pretty difficult now, hard to find comfy position, and when we do i just feel abit too fat and exposed haha, doesnt help when LO starts kicking away half way through!! really off putting,

    i think we'll all go through this it just takes getting used to as its hard to feel comfortable with your body when its changing literally every day,
    dont worry, xxx
     
  9. babytots

    babytots Well-Known Member

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    hey hunni not the only one. me and df :sex: when i was 16 weeks for the first time since i got pg and fook me did it hurt so we had to stop. i felt so guilty afterwards and couldnt stop apolgising to him. not sure if i could try it again til the baby is born and i'm back to normal down there. :hug: am sure your hubby doesnt mind after all you are carrying a baby in there. x
     
  10. TigerLady

    TigerLady CaveTiger Clan Mama

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    I agree with trying other positions and not having high expectations of each other. I have found that the foreplay (even if it is just things said with winks during the day) helps the "sexiness" of it all. The sexiness is definitely no longer concentrated in the deed itself.

    It has been a real adjustment for me, too. I used to have a mongo sex drive (more than OH did) But now it has all but vanished. So, I have to work a bit harder at it, but it is worth it. And OH understands that it simply won't come with anywhere near the frequency it used to.

    As for not feeling sexy, keep in mind that many guys find the pg woman's body VERY sexy (even if we don't understand why). I know my OH does and he doesn't even have to say it. It is just the way he looks at my belly with this look of awe and amazement followed right by that twinkle. Afterall, that is HIS kid in there making me all round and huge. So, I try to keep that in mind. Even though I don't feel sexy, doesn't mean that OH doesn't think I am.

    :hugs:
     
  11. smith87999

    smith87999 Mom of 4

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    Gals.. I hate to say it... I hate to be a downer... but enjoy the sex now while you still want it and are getting some rest, maybe TMI but doggie style works well and the baby is hidden under you...

    In my experience... of having 3 babies.. your sex drive gets worse after the baby... you are tired from little sleep, you are sore down there, and your hormones are even more wacked out then now.. I think it is natures way of stopping you from getting pregnant again right away...

    I went from wanting sex all the time (not pregnant)
    to wanting it some of the time (pregnant)
    to not wanting it at all... (after the baby)

    But eventually it comes back... it will get better... my point is... try to enjoy it now... get adventurous... and creative... but it is definitely different than how it used to be...

    Hang in there :hugs:
     
  12. nuttymummy

    nuttymummy Well-Known Member

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    jus be glad all u girls can have sex!!!!

    i have a very low lying placenta (slightly hanging over the top of the cervix) so its no sex for me!!!

    OH is brilliant though, if i get the URGE :rofl: he stops me in my tracks and reminds me that i wouldnt want to do anything to harm the baby and that he could never do it knowing the babies life could be in danger (alot better than a pushy man!!)
    but we get round it in other ways..........

    but like i said, be glad u can have sex, and smith is right, after the baby is born u wont want to do it at all!!! the sleepless nights drain you!!!!
     
  13. misswren

    misswren Proud mama of 3 girlies

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    Awww girls, at least you have an OH to have or not have the sex with hehe
    My ex has totally abandoned me and I am very possibly going on a date this weekend and I am very 2nd tri style frisky so I may well have to contemplate finding it ok with a new person in this state or going without until 2010 hehe
    It isn't easy is it?!
    xx
     
  14. golcarlilly

    golcarlilly Proud mum of 2

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    We only have :sex: around once a week now, I feel really bad about it but I just don't feel sexy really even though DH thinks I look it, I find it hard to concentrate on anything but the baby these days and it sort of puts me off IYKWIM, I feel scared that some harm will come to LO even though I know that is being silly and it stops me enjoying myself (to the point where I find it difficult to 'O' too) :blush:
     
  15. keerthy

    keerthy Well-Known Member

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    arrrgghhhh! I think I am the only one different in here!
    I feel too sexy and want it all the time... I wasnt like this before! I feel am such an arse.... and I shouldnt be doing it.... But I end pestering my husband for 'it' lol!!!!!! Poor fella is so scared to do anything! he says he isn't "comfortable" .... hmmmm... really dont know what that means! he isnt ready to even discuss about it... lols!

    So, I have decided to stop asking him! and keep myself busy thinking about the baby! hmm.... do I have a choice?????
     

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