TTC #1 and looking for emotional support

[Sarah Wood]

I have never done anything like this but have found myself in a place looking for support. My husband and I have been ttc for almost two years and this summer began the preliminary testing for infertility. Everything has checked out okay for the both of us and other than a few emotional periods, I felt like I've handled everything okay. We are beginning the first step of estradiol and clomid in addition to HSG this month. I felt like I was still very positive about everything until last night when I physically picked up the medication. Since then I can't seem to turn off the tears. I'm overwhelmed with the feeling of failure, like my body couldn't do what it was supposed to do. Now, I know many women go through much more for much longer to conceive, so I feel like a weak big baby about crying this hard. The husband tries to be supportive with annoying comments like "cheer up", which I find makes me cry harder. I guess what I'm looking for here is other people to cry with through this very scary, anxiety ridden journey. I knew it would be emotional but I wasn't prepared for the wall that hit me last night looking at the medication. I just want to know it's okay to be sad sometimes. Well whatever comes of this thread, I do feel a bit better getting that out

 

[Bevziibubble]

Hi and welcome to BabyandBump
I'm so sorry you're going through this. Best wishes

 

[Rebandy]

DH and I have been ttc off and on (work travel) for a long time. I have definitely been through waves of what you are feeling. For me they come and go. I feel like the emotions get easier to process over time. I have gotten to a point where I am just grateful to have a wonderful DH who supports me and is doing this life along side me. We are going to our first IVF appt this week and I can honestly say the earlier treatments (hsg, clomid, IUI) were harder emotionally than preparing for this one. I hope you can find some comfort in knowing you are not along and that hopefully one day it will be better. For now feel those feelings.