update on the woman who puts stuff on Marley's grave....

[secretbaby]

Poor Woman - I agree with all the above comments - how sad for her and it must really help you to understand why she does this.

A lady I know through church had her son in 1969 - he lived 5 hours - they whisked him away after delivery to another hospital - she only caught a glipse of his feet. Her husband came back and said that the baby had died - and that was it, he would not tell her if or where the baby was burried and would not speak of baby. She did get to name him and she called him Dale. They split up and she said it was a couple of years after she found the courage to try and find out (she said it wasn't like now when woman had so much freedom) the woman at the records office took her details but couldn't promise anything but to come back in a few weeks (before computers it was early 70's)... she said "I knew they had found him as the woman smiled at me when I walked in the office" and they had - she then knew where his grave was and it gives her such comfort to go and put flowers there. These poor women who were treated so badly on top of their loss, there are so many of them and sometimes no one to tell their story too. .. they weren't allowed to share it and now no one may ask. It is so heartbreaking for them and their families x

 

[sweetthang24]

it is so heartbreaking. I am in floods of tears, that was a very emotional read.

I can't believe she was treated like that, but i would think it is comforting to you to know that she will will be watching over him.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

 

[emme]

such an amazing story, what a wonderful woman xx

 

[Mrs_X]

im so sorry for your loss. the old ladies story had me in tears . marley has a gaurdian looking over her and it must be comforting for you (((hugs)))
my grandma lost her 1st baby in 1967, he cried at first but died 2 hours later. my grandad broke the news and then brushed it all under the carpet. my grandma wanted to talk about it but no one would listen. she concieved my mum within a month afterwards.
my grandma turned to alcohol to deal with her greif after my mum, then was prescribed serious antideppresants and got addicted to them. she then developed bullimia and other mental health issues.
she died in her mid fifties due multiple organ failure with alcohol abuse being the reason. her liver was twice its normal size.
when i lost my angels, it was dealt with sympathy and i got alot of support. it really upsets me that my grandma had to deal with all that pain to herself when i was supported

 

[DueSeptember]

awww wonder if a Nurse took her Baby...Like them Lifetime Movies...That is cute that she watches over Marleys Grave

 

[Ohmy4]

Thats really sweet of her to do. Really sad actually...she's got some depression, which is TOTALLY understandable. Quite horrible. My grandma lost a baby back in the 50s. My grandma went into labor on Christmas and no doctor was around. Apparently the doctor wanted to finish his christmas party so he got there late. My grandma's baby got stuck in the birth canal...shoulder distosia. The baby passed and everyone acted like it was nothing. Took the baby like it was nothing and my grandma never knew what happened to him....she thinks he was creamated...something she was against. To his very day she'll still cry at the fact that she doesnt know where he is...or what happened to him. That was all very common back in those days....makes me cry....I feel horrible for this lady...

 

[helenb]

that story is so sad but as has already been stated very true for those times.

i remember my great-grandmother sharing a story with me about the child she had born sleeping. when her son was born, he was wrapped in brown paper and placed on the back of the fire by the midwife. the only reason she knew that she had another son was because my great-grandmother became very upset (obviously) and demanded to know. i used to find this story very hard to believe and it wasn't until she passed away and i got older that my great-uncle told me all about it. my grandma never got over it.

i often think that my great-grandmother is watching over me and although i miscarry quite early, i think she looks after me.

the eldery woman is a remarkable lady and has lived with her pain for so long x

 

[Croc-O-Dile]

That made me cry. What a remarkable woman.

 

[NYcountrygirl]

wow, what a touching story. It seems you actually have an angel on earth protecting your lil angel with wings. You can both be a support for eachother really, and you can both greive and tell stories. I'm so sorry for your loss. Perhaps this woman can help you through your greiving process, and you can help her with hers, as she prob never was alloud to grieve the death of her baby. I could never imagine not knowing where my baby was burried. What an empty feeling she must have.

 

[tessica123]

such a lovely thing for her to do

so sorry for your loss and her

xx