US Army Families - I NEED YOUR HELP/SUGGESTIONS!

[greenbeans12]

My husband and I have been married for over a month. He is in the US Army and his rank is a Private E-3. He is stationed in another state (in the US) and the kids and I are making the move to our new home on base within the next 2 weeks. Originally our plan was to have my husband fly in on a Friday night and drive my vehicle over a thousand miles into the new state we will be living in so I wasn't driving by myself with 2 young children on a trip that is going to take 24+ hours. That way it would lighten my load, be much safer, and he would be able to return to work Monday. He wouldn't have to take off of work at all. The flight would take off 2 hours after he got off work, so plenty of time to get to the airport, and land 3 hours later. We would arrive in the state late Sunday evening. However, he had 2 commanders sign off on it and his sergeant refuse to do so because of personal conflict between them (which is an on going affair, the sergeant is also refusing my husband the right and permission to take care of matters needed such as housing paperwork, internet/cable install appointments/insurance/etc during work hours). This makes it impossible for my husband to do anything because he gots off of work around 5 PM and by then everything is closed and on the weekends they are closed.

We made other plans for someone else to travel with me but they fell through due to my vehicle situation and now I have to fly into the new state we're moving to. If I book my flight to land into another airport about 3 hours away from the base (instead of the one 5 minutes away from base) we can save a tremendous amount of money even after paying for gas. However, for NO reason, the same sergeant is refusing to sign off on the papers even though the commanders did for NO reason. My husband offered the flight number, receipt, etc as proof. He would only need to leave work 3 hours early to pick us up...so it's not as if he is missing a whole work day.

My questions is...what rights do we have?! I know there has to be some guideline...something...somewhere...that protects our rights for family matters to be able to be taken care of. This sergeant has been in the platoon for a short time and has done the same to other families/soldiers for NO reason. I am so over it and now that it is effecting our family as a whole I am ready to take matters into my own hands even if it's seeking a lawyer.

Any advice/tips? I am desperate for help!!

 

[MrsMcK14]

Ex-Army brat/girlfriend here.

Have your husband go up the chain of command. The OK does not stop with that sergeant, and if he won't give the OK your hubs has the right to go above him. Tell him to make sure he keeps his cool, because losing it won't do any of you any good.

Good luck! Sometimes military red tape really sucks!

 

[TriChick]

I was active duty Navy for 10 years, and separated as an E-6. While I can't speak for the Army in particular, I worked on Army posts in a joint environment for that time, and the way our services handle things is very similar.

First, do NOT hire a lawyer or take matters into your own hands. In hopes of providing some insight, I CANNOT stress this enough. As a military spouse, you are not part of the chain of command, nor are you part of the process. I'm not saying this to be mean, but to help keep you from falling into the trap that many new military spouses do. Not only will getting involved get you no where, but it will create even bigger problems between your husband and his superiors. As a supervisor, if the spouse of one of my sailors or soldiers approached me, I would kindly ask that they speak to their husband/wife regarding any issues they may have. The military has protocol and regulations for how things are handled. If your husband has a legitimate concern with the way his SGT is behaving, he should use his chain of command in the manner which it was intended. I have seen the new spouses of junior enlisted get involved before, and not only does it not work, it can cause HELL for the spouse in the workplace. That being said:

1. Was he not given some type of house-hunting leave when he PCSed? Or was he in the barracks when he first got stationed there?

2. Has he put in a leave request? Not just asking for time off, but for legitimate leave? Much like a civilian job, no one is owed free time off in the military to take care of errands, etc. Many times you need to burn leave for that, unless your supervisor allows it (which is entirely at their discretion). In addition, almost every command I have been at has a distance limit for travel without leave (often 150-200 mile radius), as well as an Army-wide regulation for distance that you can drive in a single day while on leave. For the Navy it's 400 miles, I believe the Army is around the same. I would be very surprised if his supervisors approved the trip without leave.

In the military setting, the needs of the service will sometimes trump the needs of the family unfortunately. You might have to alter your plans a little, or wait until he has approved leave. I'm a little confused however, how his plans were approved by higher ups but not his platoon SGT? They are the first line in his chain of command. How did the request get past him to be approved?

I know it's probably not what you want to hear, and I'm in no way trying to be harsh. I'm just trying to help you both avoid added frustration and possible embarrassment. Military life can be a pain in the ass, sometimes the biggest one you've ever experienced. But it's worth it in the long run, I promise! Good luck!

 

[greenbeans12]

Trichick, thank you so much for your response. This is an ongoing personal affair between his sergeant and him and a few other's in the platoon. This particular sergeant started working in the platoon about 6 months ago and has diverged the group into "favorites". Meaning, although it's illegal in the Army, he is spending time outside of the workplace with lower rank soldiers in his platoon that are willing to kiss his you-know-what and empower him. He does things such as hangs out in his office during work hours with a group of 3-5 soldiers he is buddy-buddy with and gives details/jobs to all the others. One of those soldiers just so happens to be my husband's ex best friend/roomie in the barracks. They grew apart as soon as the "favoring these 5" started. My husband has tried to go up the chain of command but no one is willing to help or be a part of it.

One issue is he was punched in the face by a sergeant while in desert training. Several superiors saw it happen and he had a swollen and busted lip and he tried to climb the chain of command....nothing happened. No consequence for the sergeant that struck my husband ( my husband did not hit back). Another one is appointing my husband tasks that set him up for failure. The sergeant who makes everything difficult wrote my husband up (first time he was ever written up and it was because after a 20 minute session of being creamed my husband used the work "hooah" in a tone the sergeant didn't like and it's stated in the paperwork that is the entire reason why he was wrote up). He punished my husband by writing him up and then wanted to further his punishment by giving him the humanly impossible task of hand writing a 38 page chapter out of the guide book fives separate times in the course of less then 12 hours. My husband tried to complete the task but was only able to write 60ish pages of it (total number of pages was 190 that he was expected to hand write). When my husband came in and pointed out the fact it was humanly impossible he was then held back at work after everyone was let out early and had to cut grass the rest of the day. A LT gave my husband permission to do housing paperwork during work hours and while he was in an appointment the sergeant he has issues with texted him cursing him out (texts saved on the phone) asking him where he was. When my husband explained via text he got the clear from the LT the sergeant then told him over text that he was to get his "ass back" now and cursed him out even more. When my husband got back he was chewed out, although the LT gave him the clear, because the LT didn't stand up and support the fact he had given my husband permission to do so. I can list off so many things that are going on. It's never ending.

My husband got NO leave time when we got married although he did request some time off. I flew in on a 4 day weekend and we got married an hour after he got off work. But here are the answers to your questions:

1. Was he not given some type of house-hunting leave when he PCSed? Or was he in the barracks when he first got stationed there?

-He was in the barracks.

2. Has he put in a leave request? Not just asking for time off, but for legitimate leave? Much like a civilian job, no one is owed free time off in the military to take care of errands, etc. Many times you need to burn leave for that, unless your supervisor allows it (which is entirely at their discretion). In addition, almost every command I have been at has a distance limit for travel without leave (often 150-200 mile radius), as well as an Army-wide regulation for distance that you can drive in a single day while on leave. For the Navy it's 400 miles, I believe the Army is around the same. I would be very surprised if his supervisors approved the trip without leave.

-He did not request legit and actual leave. He requested an afternoon off of work to pick the children and I up from the airport. He has no need/desire to take leave. It was brought up it would burn up one of his leave days by his commander, which we were OK with, if that's what it took for him to be able to pick us up.

3. In the military setting, the needs of the service will sometimes trump the needs of the family unfortunately. You might have to alter your plans a little, or wait until he has approved leave. I'm a little confused however, how his plans were approved by higher ups but not his platoon SGT? They are the first line in his chain of command. How did the request get past him to be approved?

-The guy is a Staff Sergeant.

 

[Gavins_Mummy]

When my husband and I got married and the big move to another state, he had to put in a request for leave. Unless you have a platoon sergeant that doesn't care, that will let you leave work early...then you need to put in for leave. Besides, your husband needs some time to get everything sorted.

Like the others said, your husband has no choice but to go though the chain of command. Getting a civilian lawyer involved would be a bad idea, as the Army has their own protocol (for everything, really).